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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a 55 minute commute is too long?

163 replies

Penguinotterfoxbadger · 25/01/2015 23:18

So dp and I are buying a house in London.

The house he likes would mean my commute was a 20 minute walk to the tube, a 30 minute tube journey (with one change) and another 5 minute walk.

My preferred area would have only about a 5-10 minute walk to the tube (the rest of the journey would be v similar).

Aibu to care about the extra 20 - 30 mins travelling time per day? (He doesn't work because of health problems).

X

OP posts:
Fuckmath · 27/01/2015 00:40

People being all Hmm about posters not liking a 20 min walk... It's not that we are lazy slobs who object to walking.

Speaking for myself, the day is just long enough already and by the time I'm done working and commuting I'm just tired. I don't want to have to walk in heels or carrying stuff through wind and rain in the pitch dark. I get up at 6:30 for my working day and today I left the office at 10 pm. That's fairly normal where I work (unfortunately). I don't want to drag the day out even further by adding a 20 min walk in each end. I just want to get home to my family and crash out. I'm sure others are the same! At the weekend I'll walk for hours when I actually have time to enjoy it...

I think some people who don't live in London don't understand how relentless and tiring the commute is e.g. on my current route I never ever get a seat on the train in the morning. It's standing where you are lucky if you have enough elbow room to even get your phone out of your pocket to change a song. You get pushed and shoved and have people stamping on your feet, someone will do a really heinous fart and you physically cant move away from their stench as you are packed in like sardines... (that was my lovely start to the morning today..... Boak). It's not a gentle relaxing train ride where you feel like a nice stroll after.

wobblyweebles · 27/01/2015 02:32

I think some people who don't live in London don't understand how relentless and tiring the commute is

I agree - and my London commute wasn't even that long. It was commonplace for me to watch 3 or 4 trains go through before there was one with enough space for me to even get on it.

nooka · 27/01/2015 03:33

That's an argument for not choosing a commute that involves the tube, nothing to do with walking for 10mins or walking for 20mins. Personally I'd avoid the tube if at all possible, but then as a (ex) South London girl I think I'd probably hate to live in Walthamstow in any case. We once looked at moving to Crough End, but couldn't quite do it Grin

My best London commute was when I cycled in from Crystal Palace to Southwalk. 45 mins, no cost and a full work out :)

OnIlkleyMoorBahTwat · 27/01/2015 03:46

YY nooks about not choosing the tube sometimes. On the times I've used the tube sometimes it feels like you walk further underground to go up and down and along all the tunnels than you would staying on the surface.

In fact I think there is a website that helps you find out when it is quicker to just walk above ground than use the tube.

Openup41 · 27/01/2015 05:00

I have a long commute and a 20 minute brisk walk at start and finish. I love the morning walk - wakes me up! The evening walk after a long day is tiring but I accept it. It is my only exercise. Love my toned.legs too.

Many commuters are dropped to/collected from the station.

ScrambledEggAndToast · 27/01/2015 05:51

Surely if he doesn't work for health reasons, you should get a big say in where you live. I once turned down a job I really, really wanted because it would have meant two buses and 20 minutes walking, leaving the house at 7.15am. I had to leave the house at 7.15am the other day as a one off for a meeting in my current job and could see how horrible it would have been. I would be very selective over where you choose to live because it could potentially make your day a lot more pleasant.

TiredButFine · 27/01/2015 07:35

OP have you looked at transport as a whole- is it easy for you/dh to get to the shops, GP, etc? Is the place actually isolated, or just a pain in terms of commute? I live 10-15 mins from the tube but sometimes I am late/tired/the tube is down so I use the bus buddy app to see when the next bus is due because jumping a bus can save time (if it's due) but if not I'd waste 15 mins waiting. Also on the weekend I'd usually get to shops etc by walking as they are nearby, so my commuting walk isn't a big deal (though I do have "office shoes" at work and walk everywhere in boots)

Fuckmath · 28/01/2015 01:24

Nooka it's not really an argument for not choosing the tube - my rubbish commute that I described above doesn't actually even involve the tube at all. It's 2 buses + southwest trains. I've never been on any tube that's as ridiculous as that train gets in the mornings. People this morning were actually being pushed off the train by other passengers! Would be lovely to live within walking distance of work and avoid transport all together but that is just not practical for most people.

Anyway don't mind me, just very frustrated with my 16 hour days and the fact they are started with total aggro due to the commute and if I was going to move, commute would be at the forefront to of my Mind.

though I actually think time is seconary to general bearableness of commute. Would 100% rather travel 1.5 hours sitting in comfort with my book than spend an hour standing on train, walking to bus, waiting for bus, standing on bus etc. the killer is when the commute is long but it's dead time where you can't even read, work, look at Internet on phone etc as too rammed in.

Leontine · 28/01/2015 02:00

With things like this it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks - if you think it's unreasonable then it is.

nooka · 28/01/2015 03:57

Fuckmath apologies I didn't read your post well enough, thought you were comparing a crowded tube journey with a nice train journey.

We emigrated partly because dh hated his commute so much, I was never that bothered about mine as it was a straight train journey from far enough out that getting a seat was fairly normal and then on the way home going from the terminal so most often getting a seat then too. I totally agree that nasty commutes can really kill an already stressful day.

fullsuspension · 28/01/2015 05:04

Fuckmath SWT have been beyond hideous since the New Year - there are no words to express my hatred for that signalling system at Waterloo

OP could you bike to the station? Though I would say a total of 55 minutes door2door is decent, I get that 40mins walking a day when it could be less than 20 would be annoying

Caronaim · 28/01/2015 05:16

a 20 minute walk is nothing. It is good for your physical and mental health to have a walk every day. I am shocked at the number of people who think 20 minutes is a long walk. It is nothing at all. I would really worry about lack of exercise in my life or my children's lives if any of us walked less than that within our daily routine.

Caronaim · 28/01/2015 05:18

I also thin fuckmath is right saying the quality of the train/tube or bus journey matters a lot more than the length.

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