Background to this is some of DHs family now live abroad for most of the year. Went to see them last year for a week with Mil and Dd(2). Lots of naice restaurants, no flexibility around mealtimes or anything to accommodate Dd. I ended up doing the majority of childcare as Dh and rest of family had their dinners and drinks in peace. I found it very stressful but kept my mouth shut. Also, family lives in rural location with farm nearby - 2 big massive dogs roaming freely who belong to farm. Kept coming to house as Dh family feed them scraps. Growled at and nearly went for Dd so could not relax and let her play more than a foot away from me when she was outside.
MIL has now decided that as it is another family members big birthday and my 40th that we all head off again for a repeat experience. I really really do not want to go, and especially not for my birthday as from the last time I know it will be the same scenario with the adult-friendly activities and I will be left to look after Dd. Plus the farm dogs scare the crap out of me.
Must add that Dh did all the driving and also had to look after ditzy high maintenance Mil, which is why it wasn't 50/50.
So, aibu to tell my Mil I really don't want to go? Am totally happy for Dh to go on his own to celebrate other family members bday.