to think putting salt on your food before you taste it is rude?

[KirjavaTheCat]

FIL comes to stay every couple of months and this is a habit of his. I cook, I place the meal in front of everyone at the table and before we've all picked up our knives and forks he's shaking salt onto his food.

He hasn't tasted it, he doesn't know if the seasoning is to his taste or not, he just goes ahead and does it.

On Saturday I made everyone cheese and pepperoni omelettes for breakfast. As he went to pick up the salt I stopped him and said, 'you should try it first, pepperoni tends to be quite salty' so he tried it, and lo and behold he didn't want any.

He's wasted food before, declaring he couldn't eat anymore because it was a bit salty. After he'd shaken a load on before tasting it

AIBU to find this really rude?

he can do what he likes - but unless the top came off the salt cellar, he doesn't not eat it because it is 'too salty'. Might be a way to learn not to waste food.

serve him less in future. He can always request more if still hungry.

I never salt my food at the table - it's so bad for you anyway!! If I was out and there was black pepper and I felt the food warranted a bit more seasoning I would add it, but this would be in a restaurant setting really. If you haven't tasted it and add salt first, then I would think it a bit odd. Personally I don't keep salt on my table so that wouldn't happen in my house!

Is the idea that salt is the major contributor to chronic high blood pressure valid?

It seems to make sense in that more salt = less fluid = higher blood pressure.

But I'm not a doctor.

I would genuinely like someone who knows what they're talking about to tell me.

This evening I will be eating fried chicken breast on the bone with fried new potatoes, simmered in a salty stock cube with thyme, garlic, peas and carrots and finished with a teaspoon of mustard and a tablespoon of creme fraiche.

And pepper.

And salt.

I suppose just putting salt on first implies habit, adding salt after you've tried it suggests the cook is at fault

DH used to always add salt before he'd tried the food and it drove me mad for some reason. He doesn't anymore thank goodness because he's under the patio

I don't use much in cooking because of the DCs and I've found that as I've got older I prefer less salt than I used to. Although I did smoke, so maybe that's why.

My nana used to put handfuls of salt on her food.

What about things that have to be cooked completely without salt because many people like them unsalted (e.g. veg, chips) surely a person is allowed to salt those before eating first or are they supposed to imagine that it's a unique salty cabbage they have to taste first?

YANBU at all. It drives me bonkers when people do this. And whilst I agree with people can have as much salt as they want on their food (after they have tasted it), it is totally rude to not taste it first. Frankly if anyone sat at my table, salted their food and then moaned it was too salty, I'd be tempted to tip it in their laps!

"I love love love salt, and know that whoever's served me food wouldn't have put the amount I like on."

But this isn't the case with the OP's FIL. In the case of the dish she stopped him autocondimenting, it was already exactly as salty as he liked (as he realised when he stopped and tasted it). And in the case of previous meals she's cooked, he's rejected them for being "too salty" after he's autocondimented them.

If he always ate his meal after putting salt on it, then fair enough he would just be a person who liked really salty food and that's his own lookout. But he's not a person who likes really salty food he actually likes food just as salty as the OP cooks it, but he insists on dumping extra salt on and then rejecting it for being too salty.

OP, just don't put the salt out automatically, and if he asks for it say "Oh, do you think it needs more salt?"

This thread has to be one of the most extreme examples of FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS I have ever seen on this site. And then some.

it's rude to season without tasting first.

Are people actually this controlling?

I can't have too much salt so never cook with it. I actually warn people before they taste it that it's probably not going to be to their liking.
YABU it's his food if it's inedible he's the one going hungry not you. Just don't offer him anything else, but he is an adult at the end of the day and how he chooses to have his food is up to him

MYOB

YABU

HTH

Ja hey, I kind of get the irritation. I take great care in seasoning. I add proper sea salt, taste it, add other stuff. 5 out 10 meals are pure bloody masterpieces, I swear.

And then to have a fecking husband come and immediately pour on a cup of tomato sauce and a kilo of salt make me all rage-y.

My inlaws do this as well. Esp MIL. They go through 2kg of table salt a MONTH. I'm not even kidding.

I digress. YABU and a bit of YANBU.

YANBU. DH does this, I think it's really rude. And stupid.

It's not stupid to add salt to food you know will need it. It's stupid to object to people seasoning the food they are going to eat to make it the way they like it. It's rude to expect people to eat food that isn't to their liking just because it's fine for you.

I always put salt on food first, it never occurred to me that it would be perceived as rude!

I wouldn't say it was rude, just silly. For health and taste reasons. You don't know if it needs/you want salt until you taste it.

I agree that it's good manners to taste food first before adding seasoning but it's also good manners to accept that what may be ample seasoning for your tastes when you cook isn't for other people and they are going to add salt.

Agree about the pepper grinders in restaurants, I always ask them to come back when I have tasted my food.

I must admit I am someone who always "adds" to foods. Not just seasoning but often sauces or dips too. I love ketchup / salad cream / salad dressings / vinegar / humus. I couldn't eat a roast without gravy and horseradish [at least]

I don't like dry food so most of my home cooked stuff is sauce based (curries / pasta dishes / stir-fries). Even if I am just doing some veg to go alongside a meal I will normally add a dab of balsamic vinegar to liven it up.

Tonight we are having steak, mash and garlic green beans but I'll need a little honey & mustard dressing on the side.

My OH has this habit and it irritates me!

I only hope our LO doesn't start to copy him once old enough- I will definitely stop LO from doing it when the time comes!

My OH chucks salt over each part of his dinner- rice, salad, meat whatever.

Sadly I think the habit is too ingrained for him to stop. Personally, I find salty food unpalatable...oh fuck being polite- it's disgusting!

On a few occasions, he's been cooking something for us and thrown a load of salt in. Mainly he tends to chuck it on his own plate only!

Fgs what is it about folk who can't accept. That other people like food their own way - I bet you are of the "can't stand fussy eaters" ilk - you concentrate on eating your food and leave other people's dinner the fuck alone - if he was adding salt to your plate then fair enough but he isn't.

Personally I think it's rude to expect everyone else to like food your way and what you expect them to eat even if it is something they don't enjoy - so he doesn't taste it first - I expect he has been eating food long enough to know what he does and doesn't like by now.

Oh and having a meal with family and friends is meant to be enjoyable not with someone gagging on their food.

It isn't rude at all to salt your food before eating it. Salt and pepper is on the table for those who want it in our house. When I was a child setting the table for a meal entailed putting out the salt, pepper, ketchup and brown sauce.

Sometimes it seems to me with threads like this that some people actually look around for something to get offended about.

Leave people to eat their food in peace, the way THEY like it.

"Fgs what is it about folk who can't accept. That other people like food their own way"

But he doesn't like it -- he adds salt without tasting first, then throws away the food that the OP has spent time, money and effort on because it's now "too salty". If he were adding salt without tasting and then actually eating the resulting salty mess that would be different and entirely his own affair.

"he doesn't taste it first - I expect he has been eating food long enough to know what he does and doesn't like by now"

How can he possibly have been eating food "long enough" to know how much salt the OP has already added to this particular dish when he wasn't looking?

Foidies ate do poncey over tbeir vooking. Sll these blody chefs shouting at people who want something else on tbeir meal. How egotistical to think that their cooking is so perfect every single perdon will like it as it is. Regardless that everyone has different tastes.
I have never eaten anything without adding salt to it. If I was eating out I would try it first just in case I made it too salty.

I just wanted to avoid sliding a 3-egg omelette with cheddar cheese and pepperoni into the bin. If that makes me controlling then I think I might be able to handle it tbh.

The things people get their knickers into a twist about.

If people know they like their food saltier than average then why bother going to the pointless effort of tasting it first. Ok they may oversalt on the odd occassion but the law of averages prevails.