To think DH drinks too much

[Marphe]

He doesn't drink everyday, just at weekends, which means Fri, Sat, Sun.

When he drinks he will have a whole bottle of wine, unless I'm sharing, in which case he'll have some brandy or whisky after the bottle's empty.

He doesn't suffer from any nasty personality change, you'd never really know he'd been drinking, still carries on with chores (did all the ironing with his bottle last night!) doesn't drink until after the DC are in bed wouldn't dream of drinking if he's got to drive etc so there's not really anything for me to complain about as such. The main reasons it bothers me are:

• It's too much to be good for his health
• He drinks so much and his body is so accustomed to it that there don't appear to be any ill effects - you should notice the difference when someone's had a whole bottle IMO
• When he drinks he snores - this is selfishly my main bugbear. I've told him countless times and he either doesn't believe me or doesn't care. He knew that today I had some important meetings (to me) and I've had to sit through them on hardly any sleep

So, is he drinking too much and AIBU to think that, especially on a Sunday night, he should be more considerate and rein it in so that I can sleep?

My DH is probably similar OP (though without the spirits) and the three bottles are spread over 4 nights not 3. Similar quantity over the week, though, possibly even a bit more sometimes.

As others have said-not ideal, it's above government guidelines, but not horrendous, and he's having several non drinking days which is what is recommended. Yes he could and probably should cut down a bit but I wouldn't be panicking. I do sympathise re the snoring though. Does a good hard thump sort him? I find that DH snores when on his back but is fine if I can bump him onto his side somehow!

Not really much more that he should. If the snoring annoys you, I would sleep in another room! He's using it to unwind so maybe suggest another activity on one of those nights? Nudge nudge!

Not too much in my book. As for the snoring, I assume you don't have a spare room?

Oh yes, sorry terrible maths.......12% bottle of wine = 9 units, 27 units a week. So see if he'll cut down by half a bottle.

It's only 3 nights a week. Cut the lad some slack....it could be every night!
The snoring is a different issue though, can you use earplugs or sleep in a separate bed?

Not excessive drinking, at all! Be worried if he starts to up the amount he drinks but 1 bottle a night on 3 nights... not a problem.

It's his snoring you're objecting to. Poke him until he moves so he doesn't snore!

Re snoring, try making him sleep on his left hand side. This seems to help with my DH.

The drinking doesn't sound too excessive to me but he should sort the snoring out.

Wouldn't have an issue with this, yabu. He helps out. Does chores, your more concerned with your sleep due to snoring so deal with that rather than making an issue out of something that isn't one.

My and dp used to drink a bottle or more every night! I haven't had a drink for nearly 2 months now and dp has cut down to a bottle a night fri sat and sun and sometimes Thursday not great but definitely cheaper!

They are guidelines, not commandments.

the recommended weekly guidelines were made up.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-488682/Safe-drinking-limits-simply-guess.html

No one will click that ChocolateOranges it's a Daily Mail link. I have though - good news - World Health Organisation says under 35 units a week is low risk!

Besides 3 bottles of wine = 30 units and the recommended weekly unit intake for men is 28 units (I think) so nowhere near 50% over the guidelines.

If I drank a whole bottle of wine I would be drunk and then feel shit the next day. He does this three times a week? I wouldn't be happy.
A glass or two fine but why sink the whole bottle? Why drink three nights in a row every week?

35 units! woo! Now to increase my alcohol levels.

But he might be a foot taller and five stone heavier than you so the bottle of wine wouldn't have the same effect.

My DH does this and barely seems drunks. I'm pretty much teetotal for health reasons.

There was an article in the press a month or so ago with some expert saying a bottle a day does no harm to health.

No snoring here so I can't complain!

The mail article at least quotes evidence, which is more than is given for these guidelines.

Because that is considering particular things, not overall mortality for different rates of drinking. As the mail (and others if you care to look) has said, the lowest mortality rates are actually associated with levels of drinking more than the recommended limits.

Tbh id be pretty pissed off if my DH was sinking a bottle every night of the weekend. And I myself am far far from teetotal. I cant put my finger on why it would seem wrong in our house, possibly its that other members of DHs family have had alcohol issues in the past, while my parents rarely drank at all