Please can someone tell me if I really need to let this go or if I am right to be pissed off?
WARNING!!! THIS MAY GET CONFUSING!! 10 YEARS WORTH OF RANTS TO FOLLOW!!!
DH has rheumatoid arthritis and in the past I have always thought how painful/restricting it must be for him.
Here is the BUT
I can watch my DH on many occassions, out in the bitter cold weather, work on his mates cars for 3 days flat, manually lifting car engine out and replacing them with a new ones, but he can't help with any kind of decorating/DIY at home because of his back etc (he also shrugged at me a few years ago and told me he just "didn't want to").
I constantly listen to him tell me all about his colleagues/bosses/friends wives and children, and how hard it is for them for blah blah blah reasons. He knows everything, about everything. I believe he is "golden balls" at work because he is sooooo helpful....bless..grrrrr. Yet he wouldn't have a clue about me or his own.
He wont work overtime because there isn't any (unless he needs to do a job on his car), then I have to listen to him telling me how cheeky his boss is because he expected them to come in on a sat morning to finish a rush job, please correct me if i'm wrong but would this not be classed as overtime?????
He can spend weeks at a time respraying mates cars, again as a favor, but if I put nail varnish on or off he can't breath because of his asthma!
I am fucking sick and tired of hearing how he confiscated some wobbly ladders of his nan before she hurt herself but its ok for me to teeter on the top of said ladders to decorate even when I was 8 months pregnant with both of my children while he sat on his arse watching scrapheap challenge because his back hurt. According to him I didn't have to do it....oh fucking really...well you point me in the direction of the person who will do it and I'll leave it. What he really meant was wait until you have a small baby to look after and do it then. Don't get me started on how he tells me what technique etc I should use, because he has so much experience.
Stays in bed until 1pm every sat and sun and then we spend the rest of the day being snapped at and listening to him huff and puff every 2 seconds because his back hurts, unless that is, there is a car show on and then he can manage to get up and out the door by 7.30 (but bless he will offer to take our youngest and then keep telling everyone how he took her to the car show for months afterwards).
He was constantly in trouble at school when younger for knobbing about, he can not write (and according to him it was because...yes you guessed it, he just "didn't want to", in fact he happily offers to do statements etc for his friends and then I have to write them because "I can't spell and my writings really messy". Meanwhile he will sit and shout at our son who has Asperger's and hypermobility syndrome and tell him he is lazy and stupid because he doesn't complete his work at school. I swear I could deck him when he does this!
What really pisses me off is that everyone thinks he is the best thing since sliced bread, everyone knows him and they think he is great, and I get treated like I have 2 heads even when they are meeting me for the first time.
After years of going around in circles it all stems to the fact that he "goes to work".
Is it me??? Is it because my dad made it clear when I was 10 that a woman is here purely to wash, cook, and clean which has made me so easily pissed of with men in general???? To be slightly green when my DB mentions on passing that he is doing a lobby for his missus and he's only just finished decorating???? OR AIBR to be annoyed by this?