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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU Re parent and child parking

110 replies

BlueSuedeStiletto · 09/01/2015 12:14

Right. I'm fully aware that this is a bit of a contentious issue but...

DSis has broken her leg. Today I took her to the supermarket as she needed a big shop and her DP currently only has a motorbike. Plus, she needed to get out of the house!

We parked in an ordinary space, but she couldn't get out- the cast she's in goes above the knee with a funny metal bendy bit that's not very bendy, so to get in and out she has to open the door fully, sit down and swivel in or out. We needed space to do this so I moved to a parent and child space.

All was fine, she hobbled around the shop very slowly and we got it done. However, once we got back to the car a woman had a massive go at us for using the space. I explained the situation, and she reckoned I should have dropped DSis at the entrance and then parked. To be fair, I did think of that, but she's quite wobbly on the crutches and feeling vulnerable so I didn't really want to leave her alone while I faffed about parking. The woman was really rude and DSis was getting upset- she's fed up and in pain as it is! Angry

It got me thinking though- there are a few situations where you might need extra space- for example when I take my elderly GM and Aunt somewhere they need to have the doors fully open to get in and out- they're not disabled, just old and arthritic!

My point is, I fully understand why parents need the wider spaces and I wouldn't dream of parking in one of I was on my own- but AIBU to think that it's not just parents who need a bit of extra space?

OP posts:
ghostyslovesheep · 09/01/2015 16:42

OP some people are entitled dicks

Your sister needed the space - I wouldn;t have batted an eyelid - far easier to get a child out of a car than a broken leg

I'd have looked for end of row spaces first though - but if there where none I'd use P+C

with your older relatives I'd be more inclined to find an end of row space though

youarekiddingme · 09/01/2015 16:45

YANBU. I believe at that time your sister needed the space.

youarekiddingme · 09/01/2015 16:49

What concerns me is the fact that people would rather moan because they feel the title of the space means they have more right to it than ask if there is anything they can do to help someone who's struggling.

We live in a very sad world.

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 09/01/2015 16:50

ghost where I am, people park on the end of a row too , especially at busy times.
They narrow the driving area and park as close as humanely possible to the car at the end (who thinks like you do, that they'll have extra space)

RandomNPC · 09/01/2015 16:54

YANBU. Some people are just a pain in the arse with their entitlement.

Hissy · 09/01/2015 17:12

Don't you dare doubt yourself love!

Your need was greater than anyone with a flaming toddler! IF you get anyone so disgustingly rude again, just do yourself a favour and ignore them. They can call store security if they have a problem.

P&C spaces are just spaces they are not designated for disabled people, you don't have to have proof of entitlement, and FWIW, I STILL use them with my hulking great 9yo because I am a parent and he is a child. I usually go after teatime so don't clash with parents of little ones, but I would never ever begrudge anyone from using them. I don't use them if I am on my own, no need.

MrsCaptainReynolds · 09/01/2015 17:27

Giles it isn't all about buggies! Modern carseats can be bulky to get in and out, needing the car door fully open, and even if you are taking the infant out of the car seat you can still need the door all the way open. Adults can look after themselves at the front entrance while you park but what are you supposed to do with a baby while you reverse a car out of tight space? And yes, you can park far away where its quieter but it still means taking a chance that it'll still be quiet when you come out.

MrsMaker83 · 09/01/2015 17:28

Yanbu

P&c spaces are not law, they are very handy, but not a necessity, and anybody who has genuine and temporary need for extra room should use them.

P&c space police are idiots!

And the person who suggested parking further back, how does that help a wobbly person struggling on crutches!?

Gileswithachainsaw · 09/01/2015 17:36

Then you'd do what you would do when there's no spaces available.

which chances are there won't be at busy times anyway.

when you choose to have a child you choose to take the chances with the inconveniences they can cause.

you don't choose to break your leg and temporarily require some extra space and support.

She was in greater need. no doubt.

Icimoi · 09/01/2015 17:37

Moaning woman was being VVVVVU and I hope she's on MN and can see this. What kind of wanker moans about someone on crutches using a parent and child space?

But I do agree that I have never seen the need for P and C places near stores. I coped without with three young children.

Gileswithachainsaw · 09/01/2015 17:40

You also choose the size and design of the car and car seats and buggies.

you can't moan after weighing up the pros and cons of each choice and making your choice hat the world doesn't pander to your choices all the time and sometimes you have to experience the down sides yo them.

like struggling to find a space to accommodate you

thatsn0tmyname · 09/01/2015 17:40

I think ALL spaces should be made extra wide for EVERYONE regardless of your need for extra space space. Then my car won't keep getting chipped by other people's car doors opening and we can also enjoy a guilt-free parking experience.

SauvignonBlanche · 09/01/2015 17:47

YWNBU at all. I'd use one when DH is (frequently) on crutches and struggling to move.

Original poster
BlueSuedeStiletto · 09/01/2015 17:50

hedgehogs fuck you you entitled cow, you should carry your child on your head. And in fact you should give my sister a piggyback! Better? Grin

I don't think making all the spaces bigger would work somehow. People would just park like dicks!
loletta like I said, I did consider that, but it was quite busy and she really didn't want to be left on her own I think the tramadol is making her twitchy . Definitely couldn't have let her out before I pulled in, she needs help and I'd have had to get out. You should see this contraption, there's no chance of just jumping our! I'd have been blocking the road bit off and would still have been yelled at.

OP posts:
Norfolkandchance1234 · 09/01/2015 18:44

And how on earth is anyone heavily pregnant meant to squeeze out of their car in those tight supermarket spaces. I can barely get out myself sometimes when someone has parked a bit awkwardly whilst I'm trying not to ding their car door.

HedgehogsDontBite · 09/01/2015 19:16

hedgehogs fuck you you entitled cow, you should carry your child on your head. And in fact you should give my sister a piggyback! Better?

Yes much better, thanks and fuck you too :o

youarekiddingme · 09/01/2015 19:44

I do agree the spaces in general are very tight nowadays. A rather popular and large shopping centre near me has spaces so narrow I've seen bigger cars (4x4 etc) that are literally as wide as the spaces. I think they assume everyone in the city drives a stereotypical small city type car.

grannytomine · 09/01/2015 20:45

but if your sister is well enough to walk around the store, she's well enough to be dropped off at the entrance and wait 2 minutes while you park

When I broke my leg I could just about manage to get from car park to where they parked the supermarkets wheelchairs, I couldn't have walked across the car park or round the supermarket but I was stir crazy and wanted to go out.

IAmAllImportant · 09/01/2015 20:58

When I broke my ankle and needed extra space, I was told in our local Tesco to use P&C parking. It would have been wrong to use a disabled space. The disabled have less options. At that time though, I was temporarily disabled.

I did tend to get my friend with a three year old to take me, to save any aggro though! wimp

Altinkum · 09/01/2015 21:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mmmbacon · 09/01/2015 21:23

Yadnbu I was on crutches for 3 months as a teen for a sprained ankle, I was impatient and a was so bad on crutches I kept falling and bumping into things and re spraining it, once ended up flat on my face trying to carry a pillow, my poor mother was at her wits end I'd say, some people are ridiculously entitled

LikeABadSethRogenMovie · 09/01/2015 23:50

Seeing as cars in the UK are getting bigger, even though there is no room for more cars on the road, they should follow the US lead. Have your car parks set up with "compact car" spaces and regular, bigger spaces for all.

I do suspect however that then MN would be filled with threads about how some bastard parked in the compact space when then were driving an SUV.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 09/01/2015 23:59

Like I fear you may be right Grin

Misscheifmaker · 10/01/2015 08:06

I have three children under the age of three and if I can get a space then great (and I do love those days I can get a space) but it's not my given right to have one. In cases where I just take one child I can't see the problem with using a normal space and can still get the child in and out of their car seat. When I dare brave a shop with all three, I'll happily wait for a space to become free!

In this case you are definitely within your right to use a space. Your need was more, id of happily given up my space.

LLJ4 · 10/01/2015 08:20

At my supermarkett the P&C spaces are tucked round the back, unattractive to those just wanting a nearby space, but with a path to the door with no need to cross the car park. Mind you, it helps that the car park itself is huge so there's no shortage of spaces more generally.

You can't win with P&C spaces I think. So YABU and so is everyone else, ever. Bastards.