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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Jesus. There's a woman on my FB feed

91 replies

catgirl1976 · 08/01/2015 20:54

Who I vaguely know, who has posted some article in support of Ched Evans and posted "I hate girls like her" on it.

I have posted "You hate rape victims?". I'll probably get a load of flack of her, but I will be defriending immediately anyway so what the fuck.

I should probably have just defriended and ignored but it riled me SO much. Angry

OP posts:
BumpAndGrind · 08/01/2015 22:34

Someone on mine called his victim a silly slag after his money.

I got very ranty Angry

StrattersThePreciousSnowflake · 08/01/2015 22:43

My FB seems to consist entirely of the very few decent members of my family, MNers, and exMNers.

Everyone else, bar one or two, has been deleted because of the bilge they spout.

Icimoi · 08/01/2015 23:03

What on earth is all this nonsense about her being after his money? Does it not occur to these idiots that if she had been after his money she would have had to start her claim by now? And, um, she hasn't?

AliceLidl · 08/01/2015 23:03

Someone on my Facebook shared this earlier, perhaps it's worth sharing on to try and show people how very few false allegations there really are.

Jesus. There's a woman on my FB feed
Original poster
catgirl1976 · 08/01/2015 23:04

My AIBU is Was I Being Unreasonable to challenge and then defriend her

OP posts:
HexBramble · 08/01/2015 23:10

MorrisZapp, there can never be enough threads like this.

Or should we all just be quiet about it like good little girls?

bubalou · 08/01/2015 23:12

Yanbu - what a twat.

I love a good defriend on Facebook.

I have like a 'twat removal system'.

Instant deletion for people who -

  • are positive for BNP, Britain first etc
  • people who would say stupid ched evans type related shit
  • people who constantly post how I'll their children are all the time along with photos of the sick children and tagging themselves in at the local A&E when taking said child in coz they have a fucking temperature!!!

2 strikes and deletion if you -

  • put vague attention seeking statuses 'so low right now' etc
  • sloppy relationship bollocks

There are loads of others but are quite specific to people I have previously deleted - such as the woman who took a photo of her sons first shit on the potty and posted it to facebook. Wasn't even being ironic.

Confused
MorrisZapp · 08/01/2015 23:13

We certainly should not be quiet like good little girls. But there are multiple threads about this case already, I've been on them, being anything but quiet.

With respect OP, you know fine well you aren't being unreasonable. On what grounds do you think you might be being unreasonable?

FreudiansSlipper · 08/01/2015 23:19

You ex friend has support from Julia Hartley-Brewer on Question Time

It's depressing glad to hear others on the panel disagree with her

iisme · 08/01/2015 23:19

I do think it's worth challenging these things if you can bear to get into an FB argument. It's awful to see these things go unchallenged. But also hideous getting into FB arguments ...

RJnomore · 08/01/2015 23:24

YANBU cat.

I'm watching question time, it's depressing.

I posted a completely ignored thread earlier, some absolute idiot from teh PFA likened the case to the hillsborough cover up - something along the lines of, of course it wouldn't be the first case in football where people maintained innocence and were years later found not to have done it, like hillsborough and the claims the fans were drunk and rioting (I was too furious to get it word for word, it was shown on the NBC 10 o'clock news)

I was spitting nails, he should be taken to task for that but I think it's slid past pretty unnoticed.

Original poster
catgirl1976 · 08/01/2015 23:25

Was my first and last FB argument. In my defence I was brief and then defriended. But yeah, I know FB spats are vile and I really normally wouldn't :( But she riled me so much

OP posts:
StrawberryMouse · 08/01/2015 23:27

I saw something on Facenook about this yesterday but it was an article posted by a guy I went to school with and I don't know him very well anymore so I didn't feel brave enough to challenge it to the time but I wish I had been. I think we should challenge this stuff more.

I did passive-aggressively post a link to a retort to said article which wiped the floor with it. Grin

Dognado · 08/01/2015 23:28

I heard that RJ. Ridiculous.

AliceInHinterland · 08/01/2015 23:37

What's the psychology of this - is it that people want to believe it will never happen to them and theirs because they never get drunk and wear high heels (not sure I know many women who could say that anyway)? I don't get it.

curiousgeorgie · 08/01/2015 23:38

Maybe I'm thick... But what on earth have high heels got to do with it? Confused

Am I missing something?

A friend of a friend posted on facebook earlier that people need to leave poor Ched alone and let him get on with his life, IHO he didn't do it anyway Hmm

WoTmania · 08/01/2015 23:43

Alice it's magical thinking ; if I'm q good girl and don't get drunk, walk home alone, wear a short skirt high heels like 'that type' of woman I'll be ok. Can't happen to me.

AmyElliotDunne · 08/01/2015 23:51

Curious, the high heels thing is that CCTV footage of her walking apparently quite well in high (& borrowed, so unfamiliar) wedges allegedly show that she wasn't as drunk as she was made out to be.

I'm not saying whether this is a fair assessment or not, but as the heels have been mentioned several times without this explanation I thought I'd add what I'd read about it.

ToomuchIsBackOnBootcamp · 08/01/2015 23:53

strawberry can you link to the link retort at all please?

I have a feeling I may need it tomorrow, knowing a certain someone on my feed. I would get all Ranty and spitty so if there is a measured and analytical response I can post, so much the better.

seesensepeople · 08/01/2015 23:56

I believe it's called freedom of speech. I may not agree with her but I'l defend her right to say it. Otherwise we end up like those terrorists in Paris.

MrsToddsShortcut · 09/01/2015 00:10

I was genuinely horrified by Julia Hartley-Brewer on QT tonight. For anyone who missed it, she stated that had she been on the jury, that she wouldn't have convicted Ched Evans.

If I recall, she also made a hideous remark about drunk young women and men having sex and crying rape. She completely misrepresented the case. It was very depressing viewing.

VikingVolva · 09/01/2015 00:15

I used to have a good opinion of JHB.

If she really spoke as described here, that's changed considerably. Is it possible that she did not read up on the case before appearing on national TV when a question would be likely?

FreudiansSlipper · 09/01/2015 00:18

Yes how many times did Julia H-B tells us that she had read extensively about the case Hmm

She backed Judy's comments if I remember rightly

clam · 09/01/2015 00:32

She also spoke of the victim's "claims" about having been raped, and tat the jury clearly didn't believe her re: Clayton McDonald and that it was "totally illogical" that they could acquit him, and not Ched Evans.

Yeah, right, Julia. Extensive reading up on the case!

MrsToddsShortcut · 09/01/2015 00:38

The more I hear people like this share their opinions, the more I realise that there is a huge misunderstanding of the contents of the 2003 Sexual Offences Act.

There, sadly, needs to be a great deal of education across the board about consent and sexuality and what actually constitutes rape.

She set back the cause hugely tonight. Very damaging, I thought.