To get annoyed when people on tv

[LittleMissDonkeyonADustyRoad]

Don't wash their hands after going to the toilet

Don't wash their hands after touching raw chicken, especially when they just rub their hands on a towel

When they don't close the door after going in and out the house

And many more

Please tell me I'm not alone!

I think remote central locking bleeped in about 2001, it hasn't since.

When someone drives along in the car with the radio on some kind of happy song and they are singing and everything is great, they're about to have a fatal car accident.

I don't think you can have a spare plane ticket these days can you? You'd have to phone them up and pay eleven billionty pounds to change the name on it.

Bertie. Unless it's Ryan Air, in which case a name change is 13 billionty pounds

And Yes to 'happy car radio signifying imminent death'

Also whenever someone calls and says they are going to be working late, the spouse never says "are you fuck, that's thee times this week and I've got Yoga so get your arse home pronto".

Instead they say "Sure honey. I'll leave your dinner in the oven"

And nobody (apart from fat divorced American male cops) ever eats ready meals. Or crisps.

Yes nobody can be happy on tv,if they are you just know somebody will get cancer or have an affair.

Another one, when people do pregnancy tests and the lines are so obviously drawn on!!

Or when they don't show you the test result and you only see the woman's expression. I never believe them either way then when they tell someone.

As well as happy people heading for imminent doom, there's the only nice person in an action/crime drama. That nice person will be brutally murdered, usually for no reason whatsoever (apart from being nice, obvs.)

Last night on EE:
Stacey - I've got to go & sign on.
Kat - Nah, you don't wanna do that!
Stacey - Really, Kat, I need the money and I'm running late. If I miss my appointment, I'll have to wait ages!

... Nooo, Stacey, you dozy scriptwriter woman. If you miss your appointment you'll be SANCTIONED and get NO money for months! Ignore Kat's brilliant idea for flogging bad frocks on a nicked pitch, and run like the wind!

When they look at the screen of an incoming call on their mobile, and their friend/colleague's name is shown, first name and surname. Who puts someone into their phone contacts like that??

Everyone goes in my phone as first name, last name. I had multiple people with the same first name and it didn't look right having a mixture.

StarvingBookworm

When they look at the screen of an incoming call on their mobile, and their friend/colleague's name is shown, first name and surname. Who puts someone into their phone contacts like that??

Erm, everyone?

Women always leave pregnancy tests lying around where they can be found really easily, usually by the person they least want to find out

Really?! I don't know anyone who does that. I have four contacts with the same first name and the most they get is a last initial!

When someone is visited by a policeman, and not only do they remember the policeman's name, they also address him by his full rank:

"Oh yes Detective Chief Inspector!"

Empty suitcase syndrome. Why can't they just put a couple of books in it at least?

When someone decides to move country/city. They make their mind up to go, pack up and are gone within 24 hours.

I have another one,someone earwigging someone elses conversation.Home and Away does this,the phone rings some one answers then another character earwigs and then asks about who was on the phone.They are all so nosy.

That reminds me, (I don't get to see Home and Away now), but when there was something really private or sensitive discussed, they always picked the worst possible place to discuss it.

The fact they always get a full and frank confession out of a suspect at the end of an episode. I know it's to tie up the story but all it takes is about 20 seconds of measly questioning and the suspect crumbles, tells them exactly what and why they did it, then looks all resigned as the cuffs are slapped on and they're led away

And murderers always die at the end in a spectacular scuffle, ending in a terrible accident (so the hero doesn't have to actually kill them) they never get dragged off to prison and then get out in 4 years for good behaviour.

Someone mentioned the high body count in Midsomer, but neglected to mention that Joyce Barnaby could give Jessica Fletcher a run for her money in the being around murders point of view.

Joyce takes up cycling? Homicidal cyclist on the loose. Watercolour painting her new hobby? Finds a body in the bushes. Goes for a spa weekend? Climbs in a flotation tank with a corpse. She can't even organise a BBQ without unearthing a skull in a bag of charcoal.

At least Jessica Fletcher travelled round the world to bump into murderers. Joyce Barnaby never seems to venture more than 10 miles out of Causton...

Happy - that was me and yes! I would love it if the new Barnaby had to re-open a case, it leads on to some real deep investigation with more and more cases looking suspect and the denouement? It was Joyce. All of them. Tom moved at her suggestion and she's a Machiavellian genius who did hit after hit. Why? She killed everyone who was honest about her skill at the latest hobby ' Oh very nice Mrs Barnaby, keep practicing and you'll get there' she absolutely stabbed the victim in the bush because he disrespected her watercolour.
All because of the terrible insecurity and rage she had surpressed for years due to Tom mocking her cooking.

Tbh after they killed Martine McCutcheon with a wheel of cheese I started making up my own plots. They're hardly more ridiculous tbh!

Hmm, lots of things annoy me, particularly continuity errors, but some things from the US are real, e.g. beeping cars (all of them do this as you lock them), front doors don't lock, round here we don't even check if the doors are locked, garage shut (a friend of mine has a garage with NO door, still has all her stuff in it), housing and appliances are much cheaper, except for main cities - I remember thinking Roseanne had a nice house, but in the US it's a cheap old place, so sometimes it's cultural rather than laziness.

Anyone remember Deb & Andie in EE? They were trying to make the show more 'upmarket' but then found people didn't want that, so Deb & Andie stopped being Yuppies trying to make a killing by doing up a town house, and became just like everyone else.

Bernard

Re pre-work visiting in Friends: they're 20-somethings whose birthday parties are finished by 9pm. They're probably up and about at 5am.

I watched an episode recently where they were constantly passing a ball between them and seeing how long they can go without dropping it. Alongside this Pheobe had moved in with her boyfriend and had been lying in bed all happy when he got out a gun and shot a bird at the window (then she dumps him).

Next scene: they're still playing the ball game and Phoebe walks in (all friends except Ross are there) in the clothes she's been wearing the whole episode. Monica says: "Phoebe it's 6am what are you doing here?" This gave me far too much rage - I know its said to make it seem like they've been throwing the ball all night but it's such sloppy writing because it would mean -

1. Phoebe got up at around 5am for no apparent reason and after dumping her boyfriend put yesterday's clothes on (right down to the alice band) and went to Monica's
2. Rachel, despite doing an office job, is up and dressed with hair and full make up at 6am

1. They thinks it's normal to walk into your friends apartment at 6am (phoebe presumably didn't know they were all still up as they were surprised to see her.)

When someone is in a taxi and gets out before paying and then pays through the cab window - that doesn't happen, you pay before you get out.

The trouble is after this thread I'm going to notice even more things that annoy me

Was watching silent witness the other night, and was shouting at the tv, OH just looked at me I said blame mumsnet!