to ask for your help re dh facial herpes

[Soleurmange]

Hi all, sorry i am posting for traffic - dh has multiple cold sores (which i can never see because he treats them with zovirax and he is on medication from the doctors) which means that he often doesnt want to kiss me and is worried about our new born daughter lying on his pillows, in case we catch it.

i presonally would be a lot more relaxed about it, but he caugth it from his father has a child when given a kiss with a cold sore.

the medication from the dr doesent seem to be working and he is coming to the end of a 3 month prescription. it has been a rather taboo subject for a ong time as he is very embarrassed about it, but we have agreed to tackle it head on properly in the new year and look at changing his diet/ try alternative medicines/ pay for a trip to a dermatologist. the trouble is, i have no idea where to start. any advice gratefully received.

This might be worth a try?

www.salihughesbeauty.com/reviews/sali-loves-boots-avert-coldsore-machine/

(I don't get cold sores but almost wish I did, so convincing is Sali Hughes's praise of this product!)

Horribly painful. And good on your DH being so careful around your LO.

thing is if he's on acyclovir and still getting them he needs to be reinvestigated.

I've had cold sores since I was little, yes zinc helps as does freezing the area with ice as soon as you feel the 'tingle'. But about 5/6 years ago I was getting them constantly one wouldn't have healed before a new one started. Anyway was really stressed and eating favourite sweets as a comfort. Then had to do 5 days abroad with work. Stress x 100 but all my sores cleared up.

I was reacting to something in the sweets.

It maybe he has a particularly nasty strain. Or that he's not taking the pills for long enough. Or it's something else presenting as mouth sores.

I'm prone to cold sores after catching them as a child from my dad, who never gave a damn about passing them on ! I have found over the years that when I treat a cold sore with antiviral creams/plasters that my cold sores never seem to dry out or clear up. Has your DH actually tried just leaving them alone for a few weeks and see if they heal up naturally?

I get them every few months on and around my lips and nose.
Zovirax stopped working but currently working just as well as zov used to is Tea Tree oil diluted - I do 20 -30 drops in a 100ml bottle and the rest filled with cooled boiled water.
Dab at every opportunity. It kills them before they 'hatch' properly. If one does it quickly dries it out and gets rid. My skin can sometimes get a bit dry after treating them this way so if he wants to try make sure he's got a good moisturiser to use after.

You're right to mention diet as a possible trigger. I get far fewer coldsores since cutting back on the amount of alcohol I drink.

Another thing to consider is that sunlight can trigger them - uv block for lips all year round can help.

DH gets them when he relaxes - typically on holiday. He has taught DD to accept a nose rub instead of a kiss to avoid passing them on to her when he has one near his mouth.

I feel for your husband, I have had cold sore/facial herpes for nearly 60 years. I first had it as a toddler and had frequent outbreaks as a child and teenager. Typically outbreaks redce over time. I have been married for 45 years and have 4 children and 3 grandchildren, none of them have ever caught cold sores from me. The first rule is no kissing during an outbreak and ideally for five or six days afterwards. Herpes is not strong and is unlikely to be caught without direct skin to skin contact, some people believe the exception is a warm damp towel. Herpes passes easily through membranes, like lips and genitals, otherwise it is through a break in the skin.

Taking acyclovir, is that his med?, reduces outbreaks and chances of shedding the virus between outbreaks if it is taken regularly, some people only take it during outbreaks, yes unfortunately you can shed the virus even without a visible outbreak. Outbreaks and shedding reduce over time, it is most contagious in the first six to 12 months.

Have you had a blood test for HSV1? I believe about 80% of people who have anti bodies to the virus don't have outbreaks so don't even realise they also carry it, they don't know why but I suppose it might be a good immune system. If you have the antibodies then I don't think you can catch it again but best to check that. If you have the antibodies then a newborn will also have them, I think this lasts about 3 months.

The biggest risk to new borns is if they catch herpes from an active outbreak of genital herpes during delivery, you can imagine that the amount of virus on the baby would be far more than from a kiss.

You can buy little plasters that cover the sores and help to prevent them spreading, they also make them less unsightly and less painful in my expeience.

Good luck, reassure your husband this isn't the plague, has he recently acquired this? Tell him when he has had it 60 years his worries will seem a bit OTT.

Just thought a good suncream is vital, high protection factor is great, I use 50 factor.

For herpes contact the association. They have very good info.

Your dh is right to be concerned, that said simple precautions can help. And the gp must know if his present medication isn't helping. Might need stronger dose...? It's an acciclovir one usually I think. Can be bought online too.

L-lysine from holland and barrett. 1000mg daily should help. buy a tea tree oil based face wash, and use tea tree and lysine ointments. get vit b and zinc supplements. hsv1 is so difficult whether its facial or genital - but these things help, honestly.

By facial herpes do you mean he had HSV type 2 on his face?
If not and it's HSV type 1 you may be immune as a pp mentioned. Maybe you could both get blood tests. Obviously it's v wise to take precautions so the baby does not catch it.

My mum used to get cold sores and was vigilant about never giving then to us as kids. However that meant I had no immunity when a former boyfriend went down on me with a cold sore and gave me cold sores on my fanjo. I had a blood test and it is HSV1 not 2 but unfortunately it's still 'genital herpes' isn't it . I would probably prefer them on my face tbh.

In terms of medication I have found Valtrex very effective. Is more expensive than acliovir but you don't have to take it as often and it works really quickly.

YY to lysine supplements - has definitely reduced my outbreaks - also helps if you crush a tablet and apply topically
Also the boots avert electronic cold sore machine definitely works.
A combination if these two things have pretty much eliminated my cold sore outbreaks

I am absolutely paranoid about kissing my children on the lips as I have recurrent cold sores and I would hate to pass them on. I have acyclovir on prescription, but only take them if I feel at attack coming on as they have side effects.

According to this research (which is not very readable sorry), about a 1/4 of people infected with HS (herpes simplex 1 - cold sore virus - lack an enzyme to fight them). Which is why some people have recurrent attacks
[http://www.pnas.org/content/110/51/E5006.full.pdf]

[www.pnas.org/content/110/51/E5006.full.pdf]

try again

www.pnas.org/content/110/51/E5006.full.pdf

latebear, i had coldsores as a teen. but dp still managed to give me hsv1 down there. apparently although its the same illness, its hosted in different parts of the body - hence why those with hsv orally dont get breakouts in their genitalia. one is laying dormant in the throat, hsv1 genitalia lays dormant at the base of your spine apparently. its the same illness, but in the wrong place. so having cold sores round your mouth doesnt prevent you from contracting it in your genitals. its unusual to have hsv1 in your pants, my gp sees far more hsv2 than hsv1, even he was suprised when i was diagnosed last year.

i hate the stigma with it though. have one on your face and people sympathise almost. have it in your genitals and youre still treated like youre dirty somehow. Ive told very very few people, when i was really bad i just said it was a urine infection in the end, even to those i classed as close.

Velma, that's really unusual to get the same strain in two places. Once it has infected you either facially or genitally you produce anti bodies that prevent re infection - it's not impossible to get it in two places obviously as you know but very very unlikely. A bit like the chances of catching chicken pox twice I expect.
I have hsv1 genitally. It's a bugger to tell people about but I'm not ashamed of it.

Not sure if anyone's mentioned it but sun triggers outbreaks. Sunblock on his face could help stop outbreaks. I would definitely push for a specialist referral - gp might refer to immunology

Valtrex 1000 mg daily as a suppressant works for me. And I am happy to take them for ever if it means no more outbreaks. I've had one minor ob in three years and that was because I forgot my pills for three days and was run down.
Get GP to look at the acyclovir alternatives if s/he has no already done so. Valtrex also inhibits shedding.

nothing like being unusual then :-) also explains gps suprise when tests came back as hsv1. dp has also never had a cold sore, though he has diabetes and gets mouth ulcers and apparently passed it this way. was worst case of hsv1 gp had ever seen. not sure that makes me feel better or worse! but its been 10 months with no repeat attack, so crossing my fingers it doesnt happen......

thanks so much for all your comments - passing it all on to DH to read...

YY to sunblock on and around his mouth(where ever else they are). I buy the lipstix ones with high factor protection for ease of use, Avon do them as do Boots - popped into a pocket it's easy to keep reapplying while out and about.
I almost always have mine triggered by the sun, especially when on holiday but protecting the areas where I know they're likely to come really helps with prevention.

I'd also like to say thanks for the Lysine recommendation - I'm going to check them out and see if I can buy some here.

Personally, as a person who gets fanjo cold sores I prefer people using facial herpes, it helps de stigmatise Genital herpes especially type one (the cold sore one)

I went to the GUM clinic once with a friend and the nurse told her that loads and loads of fanjo cold sores are caused by oral sex obviously she didn't talk about figures/stats or anything but said most of them these days if swabbed will come back as the facial type.

I find it horrifying that people don't realise how contagious they are and how ill they can make some people. My friend felt like she had flu had the shakes and everything and looked like someone had assaulted her with a red hot poker, they had to swab to check it was that and yep it was the cold sore type.

Ok you and your DH are going very OTT

Some facts about cold sores

Approx half the population have 1.HSV virus on their system but not everyone comes out in coldsore

1. Although they can be uncomfortable they are not going to progress to any bad illness which will cause ill health or long term physical consequences
2. Neonatal herpes can be fatal but is only caught by the baby if the mother has a case of primary genital herpes (her first ever infection) during delivery - this is extremely rare.
3. So many people are asymptotic carriers of the virus that you most likely already have the virus anyway.

Chill out and put it in perspective, it is a coldsore. Nothing worse, not fatal for your newborn and you most likely have the virus anyway. Even if you or your baby get the virus at the end of the day it just a coldsore.

Are you a medical professional Ruperta?
If not then you really shouldn't be giving the wrong advice.

Neonatal herpes is NOT only caught if the mother has her first case of genital herpes.
It can and has been transmitted from mouth/facial cold sores - it happens less than transmission through genital herpes but still is a risk.

It's equally as dangerous and it CAN progress to a 'bad illness' - Encephalitis to name one.

The OP doesn't need to chill out, especially not in trying to protect her new born daughter.