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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To tell neighbours we can hear them....constantly.

42 replies

DeadCert · 01/01/2015 08:46

Morning All,

Live in a 1930's, fairly solid, semi detached house. Next door neighbours are loud, constantly.

We are always hearing their TV (as in word for word dialogue), conversations and arguments....oh the arguments. They have vile arguments with her accusing him of cheating, they both swear at each other and they go on for hours, usually in the middle of the night. They also have a night approximately once a month to six weeks where they come back late, drunk and play their music so loud until 5 or 6am. It wakes my son (3) and we have a 5 month old too so end up with a night of playing bed hopping trying to get some sleep.

This happened again last night which I realise is New Years but it's not like it's a one off.

Would I be unreasonable to say something? Prior to us moving in my husbands Nana lived here for years and was stone deaf so I'm torn between thinking they don't care or don't realise?

They are very stand offish and not particularly friendly, should I say something or just suck it up?

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 01/01/2015 08:49

They can most likely hear you too.

LineRunner · 01/01/2015 08:49

I'd let them know.

ChillieJeanie · 01/01/2015 08:51

Try an approach, and give them time to change. If they carry on then you might want to consider a complaint to environmental health at your local council.

Monstamio · 01/01/2015 08:52

I would let them know, but not so close to new year when a bit of noise is to be expected. Wait for the next occasion, otherwise they'll just fob you off.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 01/01/2015 08:53

If you can hear every word of TV and normal conversations the soundproofing is obviously non existent. You can't really complain about those.

But loud music and drunken shouting is out of order.

Original poster

DeadCert · 01/01/2015 08:55

They're just really loud people, you know the kind of people that when they talk they're not talking really - they're shouting at each other.

I realise they can probably hear us too but our noise will be just us "living." Their noise is drunken, rowdy, horribleness.

OP posts:

Storytown · 01/01/2015 09:12

I think you should try and have a word but not today. To complain about noise on NYE would make you sound unreasonable and no matter how much it's really about all the other noise, they won't get that.

3WiseMenOr1WiseWoman · 01/01/2015 09:37

Keep a diary - regularly. Note memorable discussions they have/music/tv and times.

This way you have proof and you can have a reasonable conversation with them, or if you take it further with environmental health.

CalleighDoodle · 01/01/2015 09:45

Could you go over and say hi isnt it terrible the lack of sound proofing in these old houses?! We can here every word you are saying, and you can no dout here our conversations too! We are thinking anout getting a quote from a builders for sound proofing. Would you be open to that?

CalleighDoodle · 01/01/2015 09:46

Or even pop it through as a note so they can think about it and react before replying to you. End with will pop round later to see what you think.

CalleighDoodle · 01/01/2015 09:47

But dont pop a note through when they are in as that is rude.

Original poster

DeadCert · 01/01/2015 14:58

Thanks for the ideas.

We went out earlier and as DH was packing the pushchair into the car the neighbour came out to put something in his bin. He said something like:

"Weren't too noisy for you last night where we?"

DH said "yeah actually, woke DS up and the baby."

Neighbour "Ahhhh, been there mate! Happy New Year!" and went back in the house.

OP posts:

LineRunner · 01/01/2015 15:53

The subject has at least been broached.

Storytown · 01/01/2015 16:50

Ah,Ah, they're punishing you for all the times deaf Nanak had her TV way too loud while their dc were small!

An apology would have been nice but noise on nye isn't that unreasonable. Its the rest that would get to me

Original poster

DeadCert · 01/01/2015 18:13

Yeah, NYE I can get. Shall I just shit on their doorstep next time they do it?

OP posts:

Snappynewyear · 01/01/2015 18:19

At least he didn't pull a knife so I'd risk having a friendly word about the TV and the loud voices.

IAmOnMyBike · 01/01/2015 18:25

I thought the GM lived in the neighbours house not OP's?

Original poster

DeadCert · 01/01/2015 19:43

No, our house used to be Dh's Nan before she passed away.

OP posts:

IAmOnMyBike · 01/01/2015 20:21

Oh, well maybe it is revenge for her having on a booming TV disturbing them and the children. People are weird.

LadyLuck10 · 01/01/2015 20:37

Maybe they have to deal with your 3yo and 5 month old noise too?

AntiHop · 01/01/2015 20:46

Sounds really stressful, I feel for you.
If your neighbour was referring to their noise on nye I wouldn't expect him to be repentant about that if he's not a very considerate person. They need to know you can hear them at other times. They really may not realise. The music in the middle of the night is particularly unreasonable. I sympathise, I've had similar issues. When I finally plucked up the courage to talk to them, I discovered they really didn't know we could hear them.

Always try the face to face friendly approach first. It's less likely to get their backs up.

MariscallRoad · 01/01/2015 20:47

Another way to approach the neigbours is to ask them whether they can hear you in the night talking or TV watching. So they might ask you why and you have an opportuniy to tell them to them.

AntiHop · 01/01/2015 20:47

Also in the interests of appealing to their better nature, perhaps ask them if you disturb them even if you know you don't.

sanfairyanne · 01/01/2015 20:58

hearing tv and conversations probably means they also hear your baby and toddler. evens. also probably means the problem is the soundproofing.

Original poster

DeadCert · 01/01/2015 22:16

Some posters are a bit weird on this thread; yes I can appreciate they can hear us living and I'm not expecting them to live in silence but I'm 100% sure I don't wake them up calling DH a "fucking cunt" at all hours.

For those that replied in a more sensible manner, yes, I think I'll mention it next time in passing. I often see the wife walking her dog and DS stop to pat the dog so I'll pounce then!

OP posts:

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