To think it is rude to treat a breastfeeding mother like a child (in regards to alcohol)?

[Stripylikeatiger]

We went to my sil's house today for Christmas lunch. We have a baby who is breastfed, I have looked into the risk of alcohol consumption whilst breastfeeding and I feel ok about having the occasional drink as only a minute amount of alcohol goes into the milk.

I have talked about alcohol and breastfeeding with my sils (there are 4 of them) before, they were all very anti breastfeeding mothers drinking, mil even joined in the conversation saying it was disgusting for bf mums to drink and she'd be ashamed if her grandchild's mother drank and breastfed.

At dinner I accidentally sat in dp's place which had a wine glass and they swooped in and changed the glasses over and then asked me which non alcoholic drink I'd like. I felt like a naughty teenager who had been caught trying to have a sneaky drink!

I'm at home enjoying a lovely cold (the first in a year, I had to dust the wine glass!) but aibu to think that as a host it's rude to decide which adults can and can't drink?

Yes. If you are not drunk then the baby wont be. I would have said- dont worry the bottle of vodka that I drank each day whilst pregnant will have acclimatised him/her well (only joking)

Yes, they were rude. However, their actions were obviously well intentioned, albeit, in your opinion, mis-informed.

I dunno, I am very sensitive to alcohol consumption during pregnancy and breastfeeding after finding out about Foetal Alcohol Syndrome when I was in South Africa.

Seeing the effects in real life upset so much that I didn't drink at all during my pregnancy and whilst bfing. Obviously that is an extreme example. But I am guessing your family were just worried

Fucking patronizing in my view. Yanbu.

yanbu at all I am a bfing mother and I have had a glass of champagne on arrival at my mums, a glass of red with my meal and may have a baileys once I put the wee one down. like you I did lots of reading about this and have nursed those 2 drinks (no downing shots for me) throughout the day and would bet with all the food I have eaten very little will have gotten through.
my step gran made some eyes about it but I have just ignored her.
your sils are very rude and should offer you a choice it is up to you

I would never dare comment on someone else's alcohol consumption, whatever they were pregnant/breastfeeding/formula feeding.

I've breastfed two children for well over a year each and drank quite often and they both still have one head each.

Very patronising. I've had a nice big glass of champagne today and I'm pregnant. PIL pointedly stuck to soft drinks and watched every sip.

MIL was like "Ooohhh, I bet you haven't had a drink for months" and was visibly covering shock when I said I had one last week.

Yanbu, that's really rude and unnecessary.

Fucking patronising I agree. I used to work in a restaurant where one of the waitresses used to lecture pregnant women about boozy deserts (like tiramisu) and I always had to tell her to lay off. Agree its treating you like a child.

Xxed, the physiology of drinking while breast feeding is utterly different to the physiology of drinking while pregnant. When breast feeding, alcohol doesn't pass directly into the milk. And foetal alcohol syndrome has nothing to do with bf (the clue's in the name )

OP, you are right to be annoyed. It's very controlling of them. Light drinking is perfectly find when bf. After a glass of two the alcohol level in milk would be minuscule.

Laurie thank you for telling me,

Yanbu. It's your choice, not theirs. You have informed yourself and made a sensible decision. I am also bf and had a glass of prosecco earlier. Probably another later too.

God, I drank as normal when breastfeeding (i.e. a few glasses of wine as and when). It's this kind of misinformed judgement that puts people off breastfeeding imo. A shame.

I drank as normal when I was breastfeeding too! YANBU

Yanbu, they are bang out of order. You are not a child and should not be treated as such. Glad you're having one now!

Xxed feotal alcohol syndrome doesn't affect breastfeeding babies

Current thread in feeding on the physical side of bf and drinking - perhaps you could forward it to your lovely in-laws who might be less ignorant after reading it!
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/breast_and_bottle_feeding/2263038-Breast-feeding-and-alcohol-Your-experiences

Yanbu

I know Laurie just said

I think they possibly believe the milk becomes very alcoholic, baffled as to why they don't believe me when I say i think it's safe!

Milk alcohol level is exactly the same as your blood alcohol level, so unless your blood alcohol level is approaching the point where you'd die, it's going to make no impact on the baby whatsoever. A lactation consultant and a paediatrician have seperately told me that as long as you're sober enough to locate your baby and attach them to your breast (several goes allowed!) then you are fine to breastfeed . That said, I stopped drinking halfway down my second glass today as after not drinking much through pregnancy I was feeling on the verge of too tipsy to make lunch...

I'm someone who has chosen not to drink while BFing. Though may have a glass of bubbly with DH in a bit now DC are in bed However if someone made that decision for me? Buggrr me I'd be pissed off!

Well my mum used to put brandy into my milk bottles to calm me down and no-one bothered.

It's this kind of misinformed judgement that puts people off breastfeeding imo. A shame

This

Express some off, give it to them to drink and see how quickly they get drunk.