To think it is rude to treat a breastfeeding mother like a child (in regards to alcohol)?

[Stripylikeatiger]

We went to my sil's house today for Christmas lunch. We have a baby who is breastfed, I have looked into the risk of alcohol consumption whilst breastfeeding and I feel ok about having the occasional drink as only a minute amount of alcohol goes into the milk.

I have talked about alcohol and breastfeeding with my sils (there are 4 of them) before, they were all very anti breastfeeding mothers drinking, mil even joined in the conversation saying it was disgusting for bf mums to drink and she'd be ashamed if her grandchild's mother drank and breastfed.

At dinner I accidentally sat in dp's place which had a wine glass and they swooped in and changed the glasses over and then asked me which non alcoholic drink I'd like. I felt like a naughty teenager who had been caught trying to have a sneaky drink!

I'm at home enjoying a lovely cold (the first in a year, I had to dust the wine glass!) but aibu to think that as a host it's rude to decide which adults can and can't drink?

Yes that is really rude.

I've been breastfeeding a year now and drink as normal (not to excess, but more due to wanting to avoid hangovers than concerns about it getting into the milk - having read up on it).

I like to think I'd have brazened it out with a baby on the boob and a glass of wine in the other hand! (But I probably would have done as you did and waited till I got home!)

My mum mocked me today for limiting my alcohol consumption to two glasses. Ds is 8 days old! Ffs let us make our own decisions!

YANBU the engineer in me forced me to do the nerdy calculation on blood alcohol levels. It is minute after a couple of glasses they are talking nonsense.

www.slate.com/articles/double_x/the_kids/2014/12/breast_feeding_and_alcohol_it_s_fine_to_drink_while_nursing.html?wpsrc=sh_all_tab_tw_top

A friend and I did some calculations about this yesterday (American quantities but it still is a good illustration)

She worked out that if
1/1250 is based on a BAC of .08%, not one or two drinks, which would have a BAC of even less.

1250 tsp = 26 cups, so one teaspoon worth in 26 cups
1250 oz = 156.25 cups
1250 oz = 9.76 gallons-- this is the easiest to picture, i can "see" 9 3/4 gallons of milk, and one ounce.

I found out that apparently a 13lb baby has about a pint of blood. So mix that 10 gallons of water with 1 oz of pure alcohol, then take 4 oz out and dilute it in a pint. That is about the right concentration and would be incredibly weak, so weak that it is probably not detectable by a person drinking it.

Really rude and patronising, I don't drink much, am breastfeeding now but have a drink or two every week or two. Barely any gets to the milk and like you say you've researched it and they probably haven't, even of they have none of their flipping business.
I also used to get really annoyed with people asking if I was 'still exercising' when pregnant..

They're basically under a misapprehension about the concentration of blood alcohol vs how much alcohol there would be if you actually then drank the blood/milk!

8 months pregnant here and had a glass of wine with dinner. Was obviously a one off but I'm a grown adult and more than capable to make my own decisions regarding alcohol.

I think your realations were really mean. If they insist you are teetotal then the whole company should refrain from alcohol to be in solidarity with you!

The consensus these days is that light alcohol consumption is fine for breastfeeding mothers. A Swedish friend told me that the Swedish public health ministry changed their guidelines on alcohol intake when breastfeeding because there was no basis to it and they thought that the extreme of zero alcohol was putting women off bf, especially extended bf. So I say if it's good enough for the perfecty-perfect Swedes with their high bf rates and overall good health, it's good enough for the rest of us!

Your SILs were rude and patronizing. Are they generally holier-than-thou types?

YANBU. Women judging women, as usual. Depressing.

Cheers, OP.

How very patronizing of your SILs. YANBU, it's totally up to you, and you were making an informed choice.

YANBU. At all.

Utterly patronising and ridiculous of them. Public ownership of pregnant and breastfeeding women's bodies makes me .

Fwiw I'm breastfeeding and I have had more than one today. Luckily my family are completely relaxed and trust me (as an intelligent grown woman) to have made an informed decision about any risks (not that there are any with the odd glass of wine).

You did well not to tell them to get fucked OP.

Yes very rude and patronising. I drunk what I wanted while BF. Not that I wanted to get pissed, but certainly on special days I'd have more than one glass of wine .

I really don't see anything wrong with it.