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Original poster

To think that Jamie Oliver lives in a parallel universe?

170 replies

iamthenewgirl · 21/12/2014 09:25

Have watched a few of his programmes over the last few days and I cannot help but think wtf?!

Every dish he makes seems to feed about 100 people. He's cooking a chicken kebab about the size of my leg at the moment. Shiny happy children gorging on massive pieces of chocolate cake. His perfect bloody house and his opinions on how we should all be shopping daily from the food market... Hmm

OP posts:
Titsalinabumsquash · 21/12/2014 09:53

I want to live in Jamie world, his many kitchens in his house/garden/greenhouse are how my ideal Christmas decorations would look if I didn't have several small people to merrily destroy it all as they move around the house.

I have never had a Jamie recipe fail on me, I'm waiting for my christmas invitation from him and Jools, it always gets lost in the
post Sad

Bowlersarm · 21/12/2014 09:54

I think he's brilliant too, 123.

NewEraNewMindset · 21/12/2014 09:55

Jools is going to be giving him earache over that interview as he has once again said his family is complete and she wants more children!

x2boys · 21/12/2014 09:56

I saw a programme when he was on america there was a family of four living in a car so no cooking facillities whatsoever they were surving on a happy meal each from McDonalds a day and he was preaching to them how unhealthy it was I'm sure they were aware of that but they were living in a car ffs .

ThrowAChickenInTheAir · 21/12/2014 09:56

I like it when Nigel Slater potters out to his herb garden, takes a few cuttings, lays them carefully in a trug and bimbles back to his fab kitchen to whip up a masterpiece (for one person). He looks in his fridge for some interesting 'leftovers' or for some titbit he lovingly brought home from his local deli wrapped in brown paper.

Meanwhile back in the real world...Grin

PerpetualStudent · 21/12/2014 09:56

The thing that gets on my tits with Nigella, Jamie, and Gordon frown-face too is that they all stick their kids in their TV programmes - it's like giving up all vestige of being a cookery programme and just wholesale flogging an (aspirational?) lifestyle, with their offspring as a key product.
Oh, look at my rustic oven, look at my charming, shiny-faced children sitting maturely round a table eating exactly the same as the grown ups. If you buy my book you too will have a happy, boisterous family like this...

Bowlersarm · 21/12/2014 09:56

Yes, think Jools said somewhere she would like twins next time.

HoHonutty · 21/12/2014 09:57

He's worth 150million of course he lives in a parallel universe.

TotallySociallyInept · 21/12/2014 09:57

Haha yes the talk to your butcher/veg boy thing Hugh also goes on about. Quite a few years ago pre DC I was up for all these ldeals of Hugh and Jamie's, went to the local butcher and asked were the pork and beef came from and all that....... Butcher smiled said oh yes came from a farm a couple if miles away, oh yes they all had a wonderful free range life. Happy out in the fresh air

Left the shop feeling like a twat.

limitedperiodonly · 21/12/2014 09:59

I love the word 'bimble' and it really sums up Nigel Slater.

HeraldAngelSinging · 21/12/2014 09:59
NewEraNewMindset · 21/12/2014 09:59

But people like aspirational lifestyles. That's why these programs do well and why Estate Agents sell certain houses quickly because we like to imagine ourselves wafting about on a Sunday morning, flicking through the broadsheets and drinking freshly made coffee.

I can't take Nigella seriously anymore after the court case and messing with her face.

plecofjustice · 21/12/2014 10:01

the one about economy cooking when he was buying a entire salmon...you do realise that his world is very different to yours.

Not neccessarily. I bought a whole salmon in Tesco for £10 yesterday, It'll easily do 7 meals for both of us, and soup with the head and debris. Cheaper than meat, almost the same price per meal as eggs.

TotallySociallyInept · 21/12/2014 10:02

Ohhh Nigel Slater. I get the rage and want to slap his face when he comes on

Gileswithachainsaw · 21/12/2014 10:03

I'm super jealous of all if them. The massive kitchens and the twinkly light s and huge gardens.

All that rainbow delicious looking food. oh how I'd love access to those markets and organic butchers. I want brown paper damn it.

All the cooking for every occasion. no desperately trying to hurry the potatoes along became everything's ready and teh kids are whining at u as they are hungry and having to dish up whilst simultaneously trying not to trip over all the legoEnvy

Southeastdweller · 21/12/2014 10:03

All these cookery shows are selling an aspirational lifestyle so I don't take them seriously at all. Jamie's done more good, though, than Delia and the rest and hus heart's in the right place. And I agree with what he said today about the utter stupidity of kids having iPhones and last year about people not prioritising food over material goods.

KatoPotato · 21/12/2014 10:04

He's so going to do a hairy dieters next. His comfort food series was pure awesome gluttony and he's looking a bit podgy. Watch this space for his weight loss challenge

NewEraNewMindset · 21/12/2014 10:06

I love the fact that he is worth more than Angry Ramsey. Bet that pisses him right off considering Jamie is a cook, not a chef.

Tykeisagirl · 21/12/2014 10:07

He does live in a parallel universe, he's been wealthy and famous since he was just out of his teens.

No matter how much time he puts into helping young, disadvantaged people he'll never really understand what it means to live an average life. For him it's perfectly reasonable to cook a large, complicated meal every night because he has a nanny for the kids, a PA who runs his life and people to make sure his kitchen is always clean and fully stocked. Yes, he works hard at his career but he never has to worry about all the little things like the school run and the hoovering that the rest of us do.

FoxSticks · 21/12/2014 10:10

His hair is looking good these days though so I can forgive the podge. That comfort food series was amazing. I've asked for the book for Christmas but doubt I will ever cook from it. All the meals involved roasting a hunk of meat for five hours before letting it fall apart in your fingers them making it into something else that needs to cook for an hour.

Who has the time for that? Especially when you are a workaholic insomniac. Maybe he does all the roasting at night when he should be asleep. It all looked soooooo good though!

GinnelsandWhippets · 21/12/2014 10:14

But it's a cookery show on TV. Of course it's aspirational and unrealistic. No one has kitchens like that, food like that, friends and family like that as part of their daily life. Even the richest person in the world probablyhas moments when there's a pile of crap on the stairs that needs to be put away and the kitchen sink is full of washing up. If you want something akin to 'real life' watch Coronation Street (at least in terms of material goods if not plot lines!).

LovleyRitaMeterMaid · 21/12/2014 10:17

Dh and I enjoy Nigel, he makes us feel so inadequate but in such a nice way.

Plomino · 21/12/2014 10:20

I don't mind Jamie at all . He hasn't dumped all his old mates when he got famous , in fact he lent Jimmy Docherty money to get the farm going , and he seems decent enough . Anyone's kids can seem shiny and smiley if you've got the time to do multiple takes while filming - who's to say Buddy didn't have a massive screaming fit off camera, while Poppy and Daisy had to be bribed to stop sulking with one direction tickets ? And jamie stirring stuff whilst hissing 'behave! ' through gritted teeth and a rictus grin ?

Although I do wish he wouldn't get hold of at least sixty quids worth of beef fillet and use it for a mid week 30 minute meal! If I'd spent that much , I'd be wanting to spend time on it !

animalsunited · 21/12/2014 10:20

He's still going to die one day though. All the riches and twinkly lights in the world won't take that fact away. Therefore he has the same fears and insecurities as all of us.

Twowillbefine · 21/12/2014 10:21

Presumably he thinks his family is complete now he's finally got the boy he's been so desperate for after those pesky girls.

Really went down in my opinion after that.