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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think this is grabby by the school and we as parents already give enough!!!!!

57 replies

Worryingwombat · 16/12/2014 22:55

This might out me but hey ho!!

This afternoon a letter arrived home in the school book bag from the governors stating that from january the school would be asking for a £10 donation per term per family towards the upkeep of the school

As the school is a religious school they have to stump up 10% of the yearly building and upkeep costs

But drinking hell I will have £10. A term not so bad if they stopped all the other stuff but no letter mentions more fund raising!!!

So far since September we have had

3 non uniform days all had to find dress up outfits for both my kids ( I made 2 and borrowed for 1 of the days)
Gift in a bag donations
Bottle donations
4school trips to be paid
Music activity pay to take part
Bake cakes for school
Then bloody buy them
Christmas fair
Sweet jars
School photos at £28 a pop!!
Class photos

And next year
Easter party
Easter bonnets
Non uniform days
2 more outings
Donations for books
Donations for summer fair
The summer fair!!!

I give up I bet I will have spent over £100 when I've done and now they want £10 a term!!

I don't mind the trips as the boys get something out of it but the rest is a nightmare!!

I give up!!

So AIBU to think this is grabby and guilting me in to it !!

OP posts:
Original poster
Worryingwombat · 16/12/2014 22:57

No idea what has happen to the pound signs!! Sorry

Also remembered school has had 2 raffles and 1 raising money for church guilting me in to five pounds a book!!! Hmm

OP posts:
Trumpity · 16/12/2014 22:58

The school I am applying for is a faith school, and has this. It's not compulsory though.

kilmuir · 16/12/2014 22:58

I don't have a problem supporting the Christmas and summer Fairs. Trips are worth it. But would be bit peed off at the £10, we pay taxes already. You say its a school church, then let church pay, they are loaded

LonelyThisChristmas28 · 16/12/2014 22:58

YANBU that is terrible!! Is it voluntry or are they making you pay!!

please remind them that every child has a right to a FREE education

LovleyRitaMeterMaid · 16/12/2014 22:58

Are you on the pta or equivalent? Might be a good idea to go along and find out more. Bizarre request.

The rest is pretty par for the course though.

suspiciousandsad · 16/12/2014 22:59

Personally I don't think the state should be funding religious schools at all. Agree that your church should pay.

abouttobeevicted · 16/12/2014 23:03

I have a "voluntary contribution of £400 a term" so £10 is good!!

we can't always pay but its a faith school so we try to pay as much as we can. thus term I think we paid £200.

KERALA1 · 16/12/2014 23:03

Budgets in schools have been cut right back I know ours is broke. Music and photos payment usually goes to outside agencies rather than benefitting the school. Your kids presumably have fun at the fairs, parties and on trips so not entirely money for nothing.

Schools don't have the budget for the extra nice to haves so if we want them we have to pay for them. This is a political issue rather than the schools fault.

JohnCusacksWife · 16/12/2014 23:04

I'm on the fundraising committee for our school so see it from the other side. After staff costs and essential supplies our school has bugger all budget left. So we have to raise money for any new equipment, resources etc for the benefit of the pupils. Striking a balance between raising enough to buy the the things the school needs versus pissing parents off is a fine art. We don't always get it right but we do our best.

Bunbaker · 16/12/2014 23:05

I am a governor at a high school. We don't make anything like these kind of demands on parents.

DD has about 2 non uniform days a year and that is it.

In defence of the school, I know that all schools are struggling financially and a great many of them are over budget due to the cuts in funding.

Original poster
Worryingwombat · 16/12/2014 23:06

We do like the school we are not religious though and encourage the kids to make there own choices luckily the school is not one to force it on ever child every minute of the day!

I am not on the PTA but might contact the school when we get the next letter apparently this next letter will give full details of how to make payment and when it will need to be in!!

It does say voluntary but it says that for everything even the letter reads " we know you will not let your children down and let there education suffer "!!!

Like I say £10 straight out fine but no more other faffing!!

Yet I can not ban the kids for non uniform days and stuff!!

So unfair making me feel all in Christmassy this has!!

Bastards Hmm

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 16/12/2014 23:09

Most of this stuff you don't have to pay for. However as said above schools are suffering massive budget cuts.

These threads moaning about schools are getting as frequent and predictable as P&C parking threads.

MissBattleaxe · 16/12/2014 23:09

"we know you will not let your children down and let there education suffer "!!!"

I hope it didn't say that. I hope it said "their education".

JohnCusacksWife · 16/12/2014 23:10

Emotional blackmail's not on. But perhaps instead of calling them bastards you could go to a PTA meeting and ask what they plan to spend the money on and then you could make a judgement as to whether it's worth it to you?

Original poster
Worryingwombat · 16/12/2014 23:15

The more I read the more I feel AIBU!!

£400 a term!! I could not cope!! That's our food bill for 5 weeks!!!

I know schools are struggling but I as a parent am struggling to

In the past 4 weeks I have paid £15 in school trips £5 for music activity
Donated bottles (cost £5 ) gift in a bag (cost £10 as I had to have 2 as 2 kids!!) then gave the kids £3 each for the Christmas fair and the £2each for secrets santa 2x £5 in raffle tickets

That's £55in a very short space of time and near Christmas as well I know to some that might be nothing but to me it's almost a food shop for the 5 of us!

Really only £20!went to my kids trips the ready was faff!!

OP posts:
TheFairyCaravan · 16/12/2014 23:15

I wouldn't pay it. It's voluntary, you don't have to pay it. The school should be asking the church for the money, it's not like they are short of a few pounds.

Original poster
Worryingwombat · 16/12/2014 23:16

Yes miss battleaxe the schools spelling was much much better than mine!

OP posts:
kormachameleon · 16/12/2014 23:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WooWooOwl · 16/12/2014 23:18

Some of the things on your list are things that you are paying for directly to benefit your own children, others are more indirect but having children does cost money. You don't have to join in with everything.

It shouldn't have to be like this because we pay enough tax which should be funding our schools properly, but it's not happening and schools are left with little choice. I'm sure they'd rather not have to ask parents for money, but it's pretty common in my experience.

Shockingundercrackers · 16/12/2014 23:18

£10 a term is less than a quid a week isn't it? It's not much really. Its voluntary. Pay it if you want to, don't if you don't. It really is that simple.

Icimoi · 16/12/2014 23:21

Is this a C of E or RC school? Because they are extremely rich. If they want faith schools they should unquestionably be prepared to pay for them.

Shockingundercrackers · 16/12/2014 23:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Worryingwombat · 16/12/2014 23:21

Korma - I never took a place from another child

I have supported the school for 4 years fully my son's take part in every activity and we donate to every drive they have

I just thought that asking for £10 a term outright was grabby when I already contribute through all the other things!

OP posts:
apotatoprintinapeartree · 16/12/2014 23:25

If it is a VA Faith school this is completely normal.
Two of my dc attended schools like this for a while and it costs a fortune.
You are meant to be happy to do this and be part of the reason you chose the school, so if this is the case YABU, sorry.

JohnCusacksWife · 16/12/2014 23:26

How do you know it's grabby if you don't know what it's spent on?

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