To think this is a bit racist?

[EMS23]

Two friends from completely separate friendship groups have recently expressed a similar opinion to me. They have each moved their DC from a school because 'she was one of only two children not called Mohammed' / 'they were all Muslims - I don't want my kid being the minority'.

After the first one, I was pretty sure it was mildly racist, felt a bit uncomfortable about it but I rarely see her so just thought, whatever, bit of a shame but no great loss.
Then one of my oldest and best friends said the exact same thing and now I don't know how to feel. I love her and have always really respected her intelligence so now what?
Am I being hyper sensitive here? I'm a white British person so i don't think I feel offended for myself IYSWIM but I abhor racism in any form and never imagined myself as being friends with people that I knew were.

Re kids in school.

Nope not racist I would move my children too if that was the case

Why, Lonely? (Not goady, just genuinely interested as to why people feel like this.)

To clarify I do not mean that I wouldn't allow a child to be friends with people from lot's of different backgrounds and cultures, just if it was the way OP explained it and there was only 2 kids that are white British I wouldn't like that

No, its not being racist. I wouldn't want my child to be the odd one out either.

Tbh, people are too quick to shout racism. Does it make you feel good. Holier than thou that you dont hold a racist thought in your head. Boring!!

Yabu, it's not racist not to want your child indoctrinated with a religion.

I did understand, Lonely - but why wouldn't you like that? What's the problem?

But they'd only be the "odd one out" on one aspect of their lives, ThePink. A significant part for many of them, to be sure, and one which may affect their views on other stuff - but they'd also have a lot in common as neighbours, as being interested in the same things (football, Frozen singalongs, whatever) as well.

Carrier I totally agree, I wouldn't want my child to go to any faith school. But the subject of this thread is a bit different: how would you feel about a secular school which just happened to have mostly Muslim (or Catholic or whatever other religion you weren't) pupils?

I don't think they were being racist.

I went to school in Newham in London where white Brits were the minority. There were no issues around race or religion or culture, very mixed friendship groups etc.

There wasn't an overwhelming majority of one particular race or religion, maybe that makes a difference. I can imagine it being very daunting if you were one out of a hundred where the other 99 all belonged to the same group. That might be prejudiced but I think it's understandable, it's natural to want to fit in.

annie I wouldn't like it because it wouldnt be fair on the child. Children should have a mix and it wouldn't be nice for all children to be "Muslim".. I am a TA at a lovely primary school and they all have a good mix of children and they all get on so well I think it's great

"Yabu, it's not racist not to want your child indoctrinated with a religion."

Unfortunately it IS quite racist indeed to assume all Muslims will forcibly 'indoctrinate' people into their religion.

Yes this is racist. There are a choice of 2 schools near us, both similar in ofsted ratings. One c of e school the other, a more ethnically mixed school with poorer children. It was amazing how many white liberal parents suddenly found religion and talked about the c of e school being "more suited" to their children. Our daughter loved the other school and made lots of good friends with kids she wouldn't have otherwise mixed with. She would say these comments are racist too.

can't have an opinion without being racist these days

Lonely if you look upthread you can see where I talk about my kid who has spent his school life so far in exactly this position - being one of the very few non-Muslims with almost all his classmates Muslim. There are a few issues, which I outline, but on the whole it's been fine.

If anyone non-Muslim takes their kids out of majority-Muslim schools, how do we hope to ever get a "good mix", or will the groups just grow further and further apart?

OP here - thanks again for the further comments and debate.

Bit disappointed I've been called 'holier than thou' twice but ok, I'll take it on the chin because it's been genuinely interesting to read so many differing opinions on this.

BackOnlyBriefly - yes, I was having a look at those stats. Really interesting that the % of ethnic minority children in schools is so much higher than the % of the population as a whole in the borough...but then I think the 55% is BAME while the 89% is 'ethnic minority' which includes white ethnic minorities.
Other explanations are that a hugely disproportionate number of citizens are of school age, or that families not BAME / ethnic minority send their children to school outside the borough.

Anyway, Tower Hamlets is a borough where many primary schools are predominantly Bangladeshi... years and years ago a dodgy incarnation of the council tinkered with the housing policies and effectively created segregated estates, which in turn affected school catchments. I wonder whether that still affects the population across the borough.

Because annie a good mix is not one of the very few non-muslim people in a school

Blu yeah the numbers looked odd to me too. I wondered if the ethnic minority families had a disproportionately higher number of children or had them earlier and closer together or something to cause a peak in the figures. Or perhaps that the non ethnic people were all older with few children.

I hadn't thought of other families sending their children out of the borough, but that's another possible factor.

My sister did this with dn years ago. I thought she was racist then but now I'm a mum I get it. I agonised over dc1 school choices. I'm not racist or any other prejudice but I Wanted dc to have the best chance of happiness and academic success. For me this meant moving house. For dsis it meant moving dn

I wouldnt want my child to be one of very few non-Muslim children at a school either. I prefer more of a mix

We'd move if the majority of the children in my children's class were Muslim.