to want to watch the Nativity play without toddlers screaming.

[windchime]

Another Christmas, another Nativity play, and another hour of sitting in the school hall listening to the screams and shouts of strangers' toddlers. Before the play started, the Head asked nicely if upset babies and toddlers could be taken outside because the children and staff had worked so hard on the play. But, of course, the play was totally ruined for everyone because of a few inconsiderate, ignorant and selfish parents NOT taking their child outside when they started (and continued) playing up. The school was filming it to sell as a dvd. Good luck with that.

too hasty you sound a bit mean to me..I completely understand the issue and agree disruptive children should be taken out. But to approach the poor child.. if I was that childs mum I would have walloped u!!

YANBU. It's completely selfish - it puts the kids on stage off and also ruins it for the audience. Although our head seems to have mastered a hard stare that makes even the most brazen mums slink out with their screaming kids!

YANBU... how the devil is anybody supposed to watch their child with squawking and screeching going on. It is utterly selfish to just sit there with a screaming child. Take it out for goodness sakes!

Ditto people that can't stop talking, go and do it somewhere else.

Bellejessleo... How so? If you'd been that child's mother you wouldn't have taken it out, just left her to disrupt and spoil the play for everybody else. Now that's mean.

YADNBU, wish our school would do the two performance thing!

lying I would have taken the child out if she was mine, but still to approach the toddler and make a sarcastic comment is cruel in my opinion. A lot of parents find managing pre-schooler behaviour a challenge..especially when being watched/judged. I would have been upset if someone had approached my daughter and made said comment.

If you've got more than one child there is plenty of time to make arrangements. If your arrangements fall through then it's tough luck if you have to miss some of it to take a noisy toddler/baby out. Why should the selfishness of one parent spoil the play for everyone else?
I get just as annoyed with those parents who actively try to get their child to wave or call out to them. Show some manners and behave appropriately.

So, YANBU

Yanbu, it's very unfair on everyone to have disruptions throughout especially the children who have put so much effort into the performance.

You are definitely not being at all unreasonable.

I believe YANBU. even if I was doing my play and my sister was acting up, she'd take us outside.
Screaming on a bus? we walked.
Running about like maniacs? sit down, shut up, read a book.
Screaming in church? taken outside.
Mum never went out for meals with us because we screamed and shouted if we didn't get attention - she thought about other people, as I do.
We once had a group of little ones around the pool table in our local pub, one tried drinking my drink (which looked like coke and wasn't) and one had slavered all over out 50ps on the table! another had fallen and slit his elbow open. his mother was outside smoking and drinking. His dad had gone home and no one was looking after any of these children!
I think people really need to think of others. I don't have DCs but even if I did, it's just being courteous as my mother was.
if you're watching your DCs doing their play and some toddler is screeching, i'd be vv annoyed. Just the same as I get annoyed when we're out for a carvery and there's children touching the food and throwing it about! (this was not a family place!!)

Yanbu. Some noise is to be expected. but letting toddlers and babies literally scream the entire time is selfish.

laughing or giggling or teh odd vocal noise fine. Full. on screaming and wandering round is not ok

the kids doing the performance are only little themselves. They have worked so hard.

Yanbu

Our school does one performance for pre-school children and one for adults/school age siblings at other schools.

It works well as everyone gets to relax at the appropriate performance. The dress rehearsal is the DVD performance

People not taking crying babies/toddlers out annoy me too. I've taken out my toddler and saw it as common sense to do so.

YANBU, and I say that as the mother of a reception child and a toddler. DD1's nativity is next week, and I'll be sitting at the end of a row so I can take DD2 out if she starts to make a fuss.

YANBU, which is one of the reasons I always volunteered for the creche that the school ran for the duration of the performances.
Some parents of shriekers used to sort it out so that one would babysit whilst the other watched, and then swap for the next performance.
Other parents are shameless and quite unbothered that the enjoyment of the audience and the hours of practise have been ruined by their baby/child being asked to do something beyond their capacity such as stay quiet and still.
Yes, marmite. The needs of the many should outweigh the selfish desire of the one.

YANBU, it's incredibly selfish behaviour. Unfortunately though, that's how some parents are, so your best bet is to suggest to the school that they make at least one of the performances child free.

'A lot of parents find managing pre-schooler behaviour a challenge..especially when being watched/judged. I would have been upset if someone had approached my daughter and made said comment.'

Would it have changed your response to the problem next time it arose, belle?
If it upset you, would you avoid it happening in the future by taking the child out before it upset dozens of other people? Because if that's the case, the sarcasm had the desired effect.

Of course other peoples toddlers having tantrums are annoying but it's to be expected at a young children's play. My dd loved going when she was tiny and behaved fine so to ban kids seems ridic. If I'm at les mis I'd see my arse, but not at the school play.

yanbu I have 2 children and youngest dd was strapped in pram and had various snacks/books/magnadoodle to keep her entertained. I was perched near the exit so if she played up I could take her out.

what I found very irritating was the parent in front of us who was holding her phone up the entire time, moving seats along the aisle to film her child as they moved, so me and partner had to watch through her phone and another persons iPad. we were only the 3rd row too. I think parents who wish to video the entire thing should stand at the back.

Wouldn't need a ban if the parents had some empathy for the level of excitement and bravery required for some children to take part.
It's not an expensive West End blockbuster. The cast of Les Mis don't cry and wet themselves and panic if the audience behave like arrogant shits.

Yanbu. I always used to take mine out if they were really noisy.

Our school has gone to 1 performance where pre schoolers were welcome and 2 where they weren't. This is my first year without a preschooler so I was a bit skeptical but actually I think that works out great. Parents can choose which performance they want to go to. The head teacher actually had to ask someone to leave yesterday as she'd brought her little toddler in. I must admit I felt pretty bad for her as we all watched her walk out but it had been made clear that is what would happen.

I would have taken my child out if I thought she was being a problem dust, as I said before. I think an honest straightforward polite 'perhaps you could have taken her out' comment to the actual mother would have done. To approach the child in a sarcastic manner is cruel...in my opinion.

Usually I would be a big fat YANBU here, I avoid 'family friendly' restaurants / pubs etc like the plague. I went to see a Wallace and Gromit film at the cinema a couple of years back (without kids - just me and DW) and I waited until lunchtime on a weekday in term time so I wouldn't have to sit in the cinema with a load of kids.

However in this case - sorry it's a school. If there is one place in the universe you expect kids (of all ages) it's at a school!

YABVU.

Last year afterwards , I approached a noisy pre-schooler and congratulated her on playing the main role.Hopefully her mum took the hint!

What a passive aggressive approach. If you wanted to say to her mum that she should have taken her out (on which, by the way, I'd agree with you), why not just say so instead of making a snarky comment to the toddler.

Belle totally with you.