to think it's so rude to get someone's name wrong?

[JaneFonda]

My first name is hyphenated - imagine something like Mary-Anne but different names!

The amount of people who call me just 'Mary' when I have introduced myself with my actual name is frustrating, and, really strangely, I've been referred to so many times as 'Anne' - if I were to shorten my name to anything, it wouldn't be the second part of my name!

I can understand people struggling with difficult or foreign names that might not be clear how they're pronounced (my surname for example, I will never take offence to someone being unable to pronounce it!), but AIBU to think it's actually just rude to not call someone by the name they've introduced themselves as?

I don't think I am easily annoyed by things but this just seems like something that inexplicably annoys me.

I worked with someone with a hyphenated name. She did tell us it is the full name she uses not one or other and one guy insisted in calling her just bt the first part of her name despite her correcting him every day for two years at least 3 times a day. He also used the wrong shortened version for another girl. If she was 'elizabeth' she goes by 'liz' he insisted in using 'Lizzie' again this was despite being corrected daily. Strangely he was the only colleague not to shorten my unusual name. The issue with shortening my name is that there is another more common name that uses same short version. I don't mind the short version though. There is a different short version that only dp uses.

YANBU. I worked for almost 10 years with dome upper management guy who could never get my name right. It's not a hard name.

His name was Richard and the last time he screwed up my name I called him DICK to his face and asked him did he Really not know my name after 10 years?!

That was many years ago when I was young and stupid, I'd never do that now!

'Some' not 'dome'

I have burdened my children with names that they will spend their lives correcting others on. My nephew had a name of the same origin as my children where people presumed he was a girl as it is similar to a welsh girls name. My name is female but it is similar to a welsh male name so everyone mispronounced it in the UK. No biggie for me correct and move on. Life is wayyyyyy too short to presume people are doing it to wind you up. If you want people to always get a name right go for the obvious names otherwise suck it up I reckon.

Cor blimey, there are some overbearing replies on this thread hmm Really, people, nobody has to change the pronunciation, spelling or configuration of their own name to suit you!

Fair point, but I wasn't suggesting OP do it to suit me - more to suit herself so others could twig that it was a whole name rather than two joined up with a hyphen. I think it's natural for people to shorten names tbh, especially if the hyphen is joining two which don't flow together well.

I have a very unusual name which potentially has a widely used shortening (another name with the same beginning was very popular back in the 70s and most people with that name seem to use the short form). I have never used that shortening and I don't answer to it.

I introduce myself with my name and that's what I expect to be called. I don't mind if people forget or mispronounce my name, but it they try the shortening I let them know that it's not my name and that I won't respond to it because it's not my name.

I did once have a teacher who tried the 'but I shorten everyone's names, it's just affectionate' line, but she didn't do it more than the once because I really don't respond as the shortening doesn't trigger my 'that person is talking to me' response as it doesn't sound like my name. eg if I was called Jeanette and the person tried Jenny on me - that's someone else surely?

My husbands name is a commonly shortened name. He doesn't like people to shorten it and will often correct them. Depending on the person he will then start calling them offensive names and when they ask him why he tells them because they were calling him a name that wasn't his own and he thought that was the game. They get the point.

YANBU, it's your name, people should try to make the effort, especially if you gave corrected them.

My DN has a double barrelled name, no one, not even her mum calls her by her full name. I feel bad now as I've only ever used the first part of her name when speaking to her but write her full name in cards etc.
OTOH DD2 doesn't have a double barrelled name but ends up being called by both her first and second names, as if they are double barrelled. All the family do this, DH and I too

My first name isn't double barrelled but has 4 syllables and I cringe when people use my full name, not sure why I do tbh I prefer the shorter version of my name.

My best friend officially changed her name about 3 years ago and it took me a good 18 months to stop calling her by her original name. I apologised profusely but was all taken in good grace.

Names can be such emotive issues for people, I can completely understand why it would annoy you.

OP, you need to come to my neck of the woods, the US South. We will have no problem at all with your double name. In fact, we sometimes give people a double name if they don't have one already.

But seriously, it's your name so YANBU.

some girls names just sound so twee it is almost painful to use them with an adult. i dont think i.have ever met anyone in fact who still used the second part. usually i have found out years later that they are really a 'rose mary' 'sarah jane' etc. the ones i knew who used both tended to run them together so rose-marie like 'rosemary' not rose mary.

but if you wish to be known by both names, your choice and yanbu, people should make an effort

I automatically hear Daisy-May when someone says a
hyphenated Christian name, don't know why, think it's because we joke about hyphenated names in our family (sorry).

If yu have to correct people once that's ok, twice, they are being rude.

Darkandstormynight my husband is actually called, well, not Dick but a similar type of name. The number of people who can't cope with this is ridiculous. They'll call him Richard (not too bad, it is his full name, just not how he introduced himself), Rick (sounds similar but without snigger inducing connotations - surely that's for him to decide if he doesn't want to be called something), Rich (a diminutive of the same name but one they think has more gravitas).

Drives me mad. He's quite happy with his name and has plenty dignity, gravitas, whatever. I just don't understand why all these terribly nice people can't bring themselves to use a perfecty standard British name. The message is "you're possibly too uncultivated to realise that your name just isn't quite right so we'll keep using our preferred version until you get the message."