To not like it when my daughter is referred to as a flirt?

[CruCru]

She is 14 months and very friendly, that's all.

Definition
Flirting or coquetry is a social and sometimes sexual activity involving verbal or written communication as well as body language by one person to another, suggesting an interest in a deeper relationship with the other person.

Wtf I thought this thread was going to be about a teenage DD! What is wrong with people!?

We've lost the word Coquette, haven't we.

About "flirting"... I suppose we might say "I'm flirting with the idea of ....taking up crotchet" ( for example). It wouldn't mean we feel interested sexually in crotchet.

It wouldn't bother me but I consider flirt to be more synonymous with charming than a purely sexual term.

The comment made to Greyhound on the other hand consists of so many levels of wrong it would leave me gobsmacked, either that or some very choice language would be directed at whoever thought it would be a good idea to say that to my child. Not sure which and I hope I never have to find out.

it's revolting. i'd never describe anyone as flirty. how can a baby/child etc be flirty?? it's disgusting.

What was particularly horrific about the old man who said I looked good enough to rape was that he was a friend of the family :(

I was 12...

My DH once said to a woman "No...she's not a flirt, she's a baby. They're unaware of that concept." - Props to Mr Claw! Perfect reply.

Yh, we do 'flirt with the idea' of something, and even call work projects 'sexy'. I'm old enough to find the latter stupid and the first normal, but still dislike either word - or any other term associated with sexuality - being used about a child.

My cousin calls her baby boy sexy all the time, I think that is a little bit strange and not something I'd do.

Lots of people refer to both boys and girls as being flirty generally this is reserved for under ones and surely just means they are friendly and like attention. Again I don't think it is a term I have used but it's not just a few people who do it it's something I hear alot (I work with children)
A baby I saw recently had this baby grow which I think is a step too far
www.zazzle.co.uk/i_flirt_with_all_the_girls_baby_boy_tee_shirt_gift-235786589933112845

Of course it's inappropriate - it semi-sexualises an infant, for crying out loud.

The phrase 'flirting with [taking up playing polo/darts/learning Serbo-Croat or whatever]' derives from the primary meaning of signalling potential sexual interest. And frankly, describing a baby as flirting doesn't draw on the meaning of 'considering but not fully committed to taking up activity X'.

I'm sure that with many such statements it was a thoughtless repetition of something the speaker had heard someone else said and hadn't thought about before saying it, but that doesn't mean it shouldn't be challenged.

Of course it's inappropriate - it semi-sexualises an infant, for crying out loud.

No it isnt, and the word is oftens used in a non sexual way.

Flirting or coquetry is a social and sometimes sexual activity involving verbal or written communication as well as body language by one person to another, suggesting an interest in a deeper relationship with the other person
I think this definition puts it nicely. Its a babies way of making new friends. My dd was accused of flirting on the train by another passenger. She was doing "flirty things" ie fluttering eye lashes etc. My dd was making friends with the other passengers on the train by doing it.

Flirting isn't always sexual. I would class it as looking for attention or showing an interest in something/one.

Saying a baby is sexy is always sexual and a completely different thing. That's wrong.

Bruffin, do you 'flirt' with potential new friends? Would you describe your male friends or relatives as engaging in flirting or 'coquetry' when they ask a colleague whether they want to go for a drink after work?

Your child was, as you say, making friends by making eye contact with other people - that's not at issue. My son did exactly the same. But to overlay that normal, non-gendered behaviour of a curious baby engaging with the world (and often mirroring the looks and smiles other people give her) with the gendered language of flirtation and coquetry genders and sexualises baby behaviour.

I've never heard of this.

What's wrong with calling the baby a 'charmer'. Or am I unacceptably old now that I'm in my forties.

This has made me so despairing I've forgotten about punctuation

The online Oxford Dictionaries definition that I'm looking at doesn't depart from the sexual.

Definition of flirt in English:
verb
1 Behave as though sexually attracted to someone, but playfully rather than with serious intentions

Origin

mid 16th century: apparently symbolic, the elements fl- and -irt both suggesting sudden movement; compare with flick and spurt. The original verb senses were 'give someone a sharp blow' and 'sneer at'; the earliest noun senses were 'joke, jibe' and 'flighty girl' (defined by Dr Johnson as 'a pert young hussey'), with a notion originally of cheeky behaviour, later of playfully amorous behaviour.

Good god, greyhound
Calling babies and children flirts or sexy is hugely inappropriate. Horrible.

I know some people who behave in a "flirty" way and others who dont, it's their personality and they are not necessarily inviting sex, just being friendly.

Well, that's odd, bruffin. I'm one of those people, and am always being told off for it and/or assumed to be gay, because a lot of people attach sexual motives to what is simple over-friendly behaviour.

I think (hope) I've stopped that now, but this post isn't about me. I'm pointing out that a lot of people assume 'flirty' behaviour in an adult is a sexual come-on. And I don't like them attributing that to children.

Urgh - sexy?! Wtf that's abnormal.

Flirt is pretty vile too. But I even hate "iCandy" buggies as eye candy is sexual as well!

There used to be a woman in our stable yard who would call DD 'saucy' whenever I brought her down.

I have NO idea what she thought she meant by that word, but to me it conjured up images of Barbara Windsor/Carry On films/rude postcards and it just felt wrong to refer to a 3 month old baby as 'saucy' (DD was a right little giggler at that age).

I never said anything because this woman was seriously scary and took pride in describing the fights she got into in pubs and the injuries she'd inflicted because people had 'disrespected' her...

but they are not attributing sexual behaviour to children, they are using the word in a different way, as pointed out on here flirting can be used as a sexual and non sexual way. Its a way of inviting attention. As i said my dd was described as flirting by a stranger (female),dd had been fluttering her eyes at a (male) passenger further down the carriage. Its was very funny seeing men in business suits melting and cooing with a baby. She wasnt sexualising my dds behaviour and I didnt take it as that. One old man stopped me in the street to gush about dd's eyes, after she had been fluttering her eyelashes at him on the train.

I've always wanted to know how to flutter my eyelashes. If I try, it looks as if I've dislodged a contact lens. Then it does dislodge a contact lens, so I have to go the loo, one hand clasped over my face, and poke around in my eye to retrieve it. Sexeh.

I've had it used about my DS and I've used the term to describe him myself and I've used it towards other babies. It's always light hearted and joking and I have never been offended by it. It's just a bit of silliness, nothing sinister.

I don't like it either. I don't think it's just an issue of whether or not the term is being used with sexual connotations. Even non sexual flirting implies a sort of knowingness, a deliberate attempt to charm, that I just don't think can be attributed to naturally friendly, curious babies.

I think it's weird and horrible. To me 'flirt' has always had sexual connotations, not innocent ones, and I'm quite an old lady.

After what one hears on the News, you have to be even more vigilant about inappropriate remarks and behaviour towards babies/children.
And sexualising little ones with sexy clothes with nasty things written on them, no! no! no! I though the supermarkets and other outlets had stopped stocking that sort of ghastly trash after several complaints.

Greyhound, that is horrifying. I can't imagine what I've had said if I'd been your mum. Good grief!!