to think that i should not have to pay for the school's mistake?

[Kitsmummy]

This year the children at school have each done a Christmas card design and parents were able to buy the cards at 6 per pack.

So I duly bought my two packs (one pack per child) and a couple of week's later they were sent home. I noticed they'd sent two packs of my son's cards, I gave it about 2 seconds thought, figured I must have ordered the wrong amount of cards (the form was quite complicated) and thought nothing more of it. I certainly didn't think that someone else might have ordered my son's cards. My children wrote all their cards straight away (I am right in the middle of a divorce/house move and want to get things crossed off the list straight away at the moment).

Then yesterday the school emails everyone asking if anyone has been sent extra packs of cards as they were ordered by and paid for by the teachers. I immediately replied, explained I assumed i'd ordered in error, the cards have already been written but I think there are a few spare ones at home that I can send back in and a few spare cards of my daughters that I can send too (knowing that obviously they haven't been bought by a parent so I thought my daughter's might be an appropriate substitute).

School have replied saying it's the Headmistresses cards and she wants to be re-imbursed for them, as she bought packs of my son's and daughter's cards.

Now firstly, I only received one pack of my daughter's cards so I'm not reimbursing the headmistress for an extra pack that I never received, but AIBU to think it's a bit off to demand payment for their mistake and they should just take it out of the profit for the cards? I know my kids wrote on them but I didn't give it any thought other than initially assuming I ordered an extra pack by mistake. I should also mention that I support the school in lots of other ways, attending functions, sending in stuff for school fayres blah blah blah.

Now i am going to pay, I don't want a falling out with the Headmistress, but I'm pissed off because I think it's a bloody cheek and the school should be covering this error. And also perhaps the fact that I straight away offered (before being asked for payment) to send the few spare cards that I have left back in should be enough.

Bumped into someone from the PTA tonight, the orders were given to the school secretary to distribute and she just sent them out to the relevant parents (children named on the back of the cards) without checking the order forms (assuming as I did that only parents would order the childrens' cards).

Also my friend on a different school's PTA said they would have checked with parent's first if they minded someone else buying their cards. That aspect doesn't particularly bother me but i guess it would have highlighted that someone else had bought the cards too.

It is a flawed process, I still don't think I'm in the wrong but I am going to pay up.

Don't pay up.

What a petty headteacher! You owe her £4?!

She's made a serious error in safeguarding, she owes you AN APOLOGY.

If the cards are for school distribution (to governors or other schools or whatever), I assume it's a school budget expense, not head teacher's personal expense.

Also, it was the school secretary's mistake in not checking the order forms before distributing.

It's a bucket load of cheek to ask the OP for £6 (or £4, or whatever) to reimburse a school budget.

Perhaps OP should have mentioned the extra pack (but clearly she genuinely did not realise), but what a cock up by the school. Not impressed at all.

This thread is madness - you used the extra cards you need to pay the £4.

If you hadn't used them (although hats off for being organised) you could just have sent them back.

They could have been generous about it , so could you.

It sounds like you have enough going on in your life just to roll with this one.

She's made a serious error in safeguarding, she owes you AN APOLOGY.

How? As has been pointed out, no-one has actually said that the child's name was on the cards. If it's a safeguarding error to print a child's name on any literature that might be seen by people other than his parents, how are you going to deal wilt things like school magazines, concert programmes etc?

I agree with Watching, you used the cards, why shouldn't you pay for them? If you thought you'd ordered too many in error, how on earth did you reconcile that with the fact that you hadn't paid for them? Did you think someone had forgotten to charge you the correct amount?

Our school buys a selection of cards to use for sending out official cards. It's not a safeguarding issue, as the only cards sent out would be from parents who have already signed a waiver about their child's name being used in newsletters, website, etc. Anyone who has asked that the name not be published would mean that we would just not order those cards. Besides, ours only says "Jack, X Primary School, 2014" so not very identifying anyway.

I find it incredibly sad that the Head is being called weird and creepy. he/she can buy cards cheaper from elsewhere but is wanting to contribute to school funds too.

Weird and creepy for the head to buy your child's cards.

Are nominations for the 'idiotic post of the year' award open yet?

Poor teachers with such parents about.

I find it incredibly sad that the Head is being called weird and creepy. he/she can buy cards cheaper from elsewhere but is wanting to contribute to school funds too.

Yes. And maybe likes his/her pupils, appreciates their art, is proud to share it with friends and family....

How creepy that is. So much better when child-hating or disinterested staff are in charge

You are a cheeky OP. Had the mistake not been in your favour I expect you would have been doing another AIBU saying how awful it was you didn't get your cards even though you had paid for them. Just like what has happened to the head. Just to clarify, YABU .

I would imagine the head had ordered a pack of each child's cards to send out either from the school or herself, which I actually think is quite nice.

Yabu. Pay for the extra pack. Think its sweet the headmaster is using a set of cards.

So you ordered & paid for 2packs.

I do see what you mean about no one else ordering your son's stuff, but who did ypu think was going to pay for the third pack?

Why wouldn't you take them back saying that you hadn't ordered them?

Maybe creepy was the wrong word. Intrusive might be a better one instead.
I just think it's supposed to be (it is at our school anyway) a personalised thing that the child has made for their parents to send to their grandparents and other adoring relatives. Not for the Headteacher to send out to randoms that wouldn't know your kid from Eve without you knowing.

Feels like they'd been taking pictures the kids had drawn you off of your fridge and photocopying them.

It's bloody creepy

I really feel sorry for teachers nowadays. They must feel like they're walking on egg shells a lot of the time. I would have thought a parent would be quite flattered that the HT would choose to buy some cards designed by their child. But no, apparently that's the wrong thing to do and she is now being described as 'weird and creepy' by strangers on a website.