I am so angry and sad about this teenage pregnancy.

[ShockingBadHat]

A member of my extended family is pregnant. She's 17. She hasn't worked since leaving school and doesn't intend to ever. The boyfriend is older and 'on the sick' long term with a minor injury (think sprained wrist and you'd be on the right lines).

Her parents separated after she was born and she was removed from her mother by ss so lived with her father. They were recently moved to a brand new house by the HA. He pays very little rent as he keeps his wage from self employment low so he can claim HB.

She has now left the house and moved into a council B and B and is waiting for a HA house for herself, the boyfriend and the upcoming baby.

Her mother has never worked. Her father works very part time and claims full tax credits etc.

So this baby will be at least the third generation of this family to be born to parents who are completely reliant on the state BY CHOICE.

I am struggling with this so much, it's making me reevaluate all my left leaning, pro welfare principles.

How have we ended up with an entire underclass with such complete poverty of aspiration? How can we address it?

Aibu to feel so angry and sad about this? What a waste of a life.

[Catsarebastards]

Was just about to say what needs said.

She would only have been in touch with CSA if she had contacted them herself- and she would only do that to ask them to get child support from the Dc's fathers. She would hardly ring them up to tell them she had a ONS would she?

[Meerka]

dances what a lovely story for you all. You both must be so very proud of your daughter! (and the other children, but it's your daughter you mention most)

Other than that, agreed with the OP. Worked in a exceptionally deprived borough for a while. The sadness of the lack of aspiration was heartbreaking and has stayed with me for years. These were lovely, bright babies and toddlers and they came from generations of people who just expected the council to provide a home and the government to provide benefits and school was to be endured, never, sadly, enjoyed.

I don't think that these children were encouraged. There seemed to have to be an external educational push to even get them to think that there was an alternative to leaving school at 16 and getting pregnant, getting a place to live from the council and starting the cycle all over again.

I'd worked closely with people from very, very, very abusive backgrounds. Damaged people who would struggle all their lives. But they still had a sense of something more in their lives, aiming for something better, a sense that they could fulfil some of their potential. The prevailing ethos in this borough was so much poorer in outlook.

Money doesn't really matter that much, though damn the lack of it can make your life uncomfortable - hungry, cold and depressed. It's the hope of being the best you can or even more importantly, that you children can be the best they can, that's what matters.