to feel so upset about this

[GingerCuddleMonster]

I fear I'm being a right drama queen . I have PND bit it's now managed by fluoxetine and ongoing care from GP.

I was feeding my DS (he is bottle fed) and some woman turned to me and said something along the lines of you must not have a bond with your baby of you feed him like that. I can't quote her word for word I was busy but I just stared confused at her at first then dissmissed it, but I sat there and felt the anger/upset mounting. Not sure of she directed it at me or was talking to someone else, wasn't looking at her.

what did she mean I don't have a bond with my baby and what does bottle feeding him have to do with it (have I missed something )

I'm confused and angry, DS and me have a lovely bond, we adore each other spend ages giggling and smiling at each other

I think I'm missing some information or something, why would a stranger assume such a thing?!

[LadyLuck10]

So this woman just randomly turned to you and said this? Where do people encounter these types, I only hear of them on here.

[CornChips]

I remember when I was a harrassed new mother and DS was a colicky constantly screaming baby. We were in a cafe and I was desperate for just a sit and a drink of coffee and he started up. I shoved a dummy in his mouth. Some random told me off and said it was lazy. I started to babble and flap and an elderly woman from the next table leaned over, put her hand on my arm and said to me 'Don't ever feel you have to justify anything to anyone else'.

I cried.

[susannahmoodie]

I bf my dcs. I have a strong bond with them.

My dh has never bf our dcs. He has an equally string bind with them.

The woman is possibly deranged.

[susannahmoodie]

Strong bond! Not string bind!!

[mymummademelistentoshitmusic]

What she meant was that she is thick as pigshit with half the charm. (Bonus of ff, you can have one).

[financialwizard]

You should have told her to chuff off to the far side of chuff and then chuff off some more (insert relative expletive).

Interfering busy body ..... grumble grumble grumble.

[SisterMoonshine]

I go with the idea she's a giant "cockwomble" too.

like it :)

[Lambzig]

Seriously, I think there is something inherently misogynistic in the way that pregnant women and new mothers are regarded as public property or at least open to public opinion. Seriously, I have never had so many complete strangers feel utterly comfortable on commenting on my business as when pregnant/new baby (and not in the lovely sympathetic "been there done that" way that you get from so many women).

[GingerCuddleMonster]

thank you all, ahh I see, I was never told this, only thing I was ever told about breast feeding was that I couldn't due to underdeveloped breast tissue so nobody ever discussed it with me.

I feed him the same way anyone would cradled in arms facing me so I know hes drinking correctly.

I'll just ignore it then, currently sat here watching dad feeding a very wiggly baby who keeps pausing to blow bubbles at him haha

[littlejohnnydory]

Yup, Cockwomble. I've loved breastfeeding my DC but if that's really what she meant, what a twattish thing to say. Reflects on her, not you - enjoy your baby and don't give it another thought.

[Lambzig]

Very jealous of your little one OP, my littlest is talking now and I miss the baby days (other bonus of FF, someone else can do the night feeds). I too didn't have a choice to BF due to medication, so completely understand the extra vulnerability around not getting to decide how to feed. Trust me, it gets easier.

[cinders456]

Ignore with a capital I!
Ive had PND with all three of mine. Youre not alone and are doing absolutely brilliantly. I bottlefed two of mine and they are so healthy and strong, and we have a fantastic bond!

[LoisHatesChristmas]

She is a thundercunt. I stole that phrase from another mnetter and I have been dying to use it. So angry for you op.

[LoisHatesChristmas]

Cockwomble!

[dorasee]

What a dick! She's just a nutter. I had PND 4 years ago so I can totally understand why you're sensitive about this. This'll make you smile... I told a friend of mine about my PND and her response was "How awful. I couldn't imagine wanting to drown my kids." Jesus... what a conclusion to jump to! I can't believe we're still friends. Lol! Anyway, try not to take it on board. And don't dwell on the PND. It's something so many of us go through and come out the other side of... full of love for our babies!!

[blackeyedsusie]

I mixed fed. bottle feeding is lovely as you get to look at each other and do not get chewed nipples found it very bonding, especially as it did not sodding hurt so much.

[husbanddoestheironing]

Why do people think that when you're pregnant or had a baby it is open season to comment on and criticise what you do regardless of the fact they don't know you and IT IS NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. Me and most of my generation were ff and formula is a hundred times better now than it was then. Do what suits you both and enjoy your cuddles, they grow up too fast

[LoisHatesChristmas]

doeasee that's awful! Some friend.

[southeastastra]

associating her with a womble is offensive to the womble clan ! she's just a cock

[mymummademelistentoshitmusic]

When I had pnd with my youngest I would have lamped her. I literally threw a HV out of my house and told her to take her moustache with her, then went back out with a bic razor and threw it at her car. To be fair, she was shit, even for a HV, and even now I feel it was justified. And I'm someone who never bites, ever. You're not doing too badly at all.

[Adarajames]

/aside / my brain keeps read ff as force fed! Ekkk! / end aside

Ignore her, some people are just arses! X

[ButternutBosc]

I bonded quicker and easier with my ff baby than I did my bf baby.

If you bf you'd probably encounter some other twat with an equally twatty opinion.

[Biggles398]

I BF my lo. I didn't get that rush of love you're supposed to get when she was born, and thought the bf would 'bond' us. It didn't in the slightest, so instead I just spent ages Why I wasn't bonding with her!! [7 years on and we couldn't be closer xx ]
You have a happy baby you adore. What more could you want?!

[ChickenMe]

"Did someone say something?! Oh you..YOU?! Fuck off you slimey little bitch" would be very satisfying to say.

You're so vulnerable as a new mum though. It makes me so angry that people think you're fair game.

Opinions are like arseholes. Everyone has one. That they do..

[MagicMojito]

The woman's a twat. Anybody who genuinely believes the way another woman feeds her baby determines what kind of a mother they are, is a twat.

I breastfed dd1 til she was 2.7 and I'm bfeeding dd2 now. I'm certainly not up for any mother of the year awards