4yr olds in pushchairs

[SEH23]

aaaaahhh!!! i made my annual trip into the town shopping centre for christmas shopping today with my 5 month old DD.

LIFTS!! wow i hate them more than ever. waiting alongside 4 other pushchairs and then the mom with her 3-4yr old in pushchair pushes infront of me... WHAT?!?

a) wait your fucking turn
b) do you really need a buggy for children that old?

i hate my pushchair and can't wait for my DD to start walking so i can leave it behind. absolutely acknowledge shopping centres are busy etc but this child looked miserable, had a dummy stuck in his mouth and could be on reigns? surely?

my ds walked at 11 months, but not in any way that was useful. He mostly charged around bashing into things with his head. When he was in the buggy, he used to lean over the side and put his fingers in the wheels as they were going round ffs. So I used the buggy and a blanket totally as restraint to actually get places on time.

I so deserve one of those badges.

Depends on how far you have to go, how quickly, and how often. There's times I wish my 7 year old could go in one, so we could friggen' get there and get back without any more dawdling or whinging. Actually, it's usually wishing i could get back already. On the way there, he ran ahead, then back, then ahead, then back, covering twice the distance, which is why he is so tired on the way home.

My 18 month old is an awesome walker. He will stomp along happily for miles while I push his 3.5 yo brother in the pushchair . Luckily I had the stubborn lazy relaxed child first, or I may have developed delusions of superior parenting

I look after a three year old whose clothes are mostly age 7. He's very tall, but he's three.

My 2.5yo walks a lot and always wants her own seat on trains etc. .. But I can't ditch the buggy! How would I carry all the stuff she needs? (potty training, so giant potty plus zillions of spare clothes, whichever 3 toys she can't live without that day, all the half eaten snacks she requires etc?) I look insane pushing a buggy round with one hand while she walks next to me holding the other hand.... But it works for now.

I mean they can walk technically but in reality they sort of stagger around like little drunk people and want to stare at lamp posts and lick fences.

I think they look like zombies when walking at that age. Arms stretched out before them, slightly faraway expression on their faces.

DD is 8 months and shows zero interest in crawling. The chances she'll be capable of prancing to the shops unaided in 3 months appear somewhere near Brad jettisoning Angelina to marry me instead.

Yes we were in London. Corner shop was 100m away, play group the same. You hold their hand or use reins, yes it takes forever (think 40 minutes for a 2 minute walk). But it meant by 2 he understood walking to somewhere rather than just ambling about.He was starting with rules of the road. When his sister came along he was happy to hold on to the side of the buggy, something I remember doing.Makes it easier to get on and off buses with both of them. Mind you ds hated his buggy once he could walk (10.5m). So for me the idea of it making shopping possible is laughable, he would have insisted on getting out.

Ok it was a long time ago maybe I am misrembering but I don't think ds looked like a zombie , we have pictures of him sweeping the floor after his first birthday party eg: not using his hands for balance. But it doesn't matter, the point remains if you get them used to purposeful walking when they learn to walk then you can ditch the buggy earlier. In some parts of the UK half of all pre-schoolers are over weight, I am sure this is related in part to late and extensive buggy use.

No still it will be down to car use, too many people I see on the school run just simply park as close to the school as they possibly can and those kids probably only ever walk a few feet from car door directly to the playground, as do the accompanying toddlers. That is their exercise done for the whole day I should imagine..

Don't want to out myself but that is not the case for some inner London boroughs not much car use there and very high levels of obesity.

Must be great to lead a life whereby you can always go in slow motion to allow a child to walk

When will people realise that just because something works for them it won't work for everyone!

My son who 8 uses a buggy and he is slightly underweight. Being in a buggy doesn't mean having no exercise.

Mrs Devere you will also be aware of developmental windows and that a skill will take longer to aquire if the opportunity is not taken when the child is ready. So an 18 month old can learn to walk along the pavement holding your hand. By 3 they have learnt that they sit in the buggy whilst being pushed along. And of course a 3 year old who has never learnt to walk a couple of miles is much heavier than the 18 month old to carry or put on your shoulders for the last bit.

Zazzie I am guessing your 8 year old has additional needs.

YANBU to think that a healthy 4 year old should not be in a pushchair or using a dummy in normal circumstances

YABU to think that you can tell from a casual glance whether any given child is healthy, or 4, or in normal circumstances.

I agree that there are a lot of parents out there who think their perfectly normal kid couldn't POSSIBLY walk a couple of miles - well of course they couldn't if they never build up any stamina by walking anywhere because they are always taken in a pushchair. It's a vicious circle.

DS regulary used a pram til 3. He was, and still is at 5 borderline underweight.

Infact he was 16 months before he learnt to walk so the idea of him walking miles at 18 months is quite laughable!

the point remains if you get them used to purposeful walking when they learn to walk then you can ditch the buggy earlier

No, the point remains that all children are different, and children's development doesn't follow a straightforward upward trajectory - eg dd2 walked very happily but slowly trotting along by my side at 2 with her reins (2 months after she started walking). By 3 and 1/2 she was a bloody nightmare, lying on the pavement refusing to move or bolting in front of cars, reins were useless because she had learnt the art of dangling off them like Pinocchio.

Yes but it shows that being in a buggy doesn't make a child overweight.

The other mum was rude to push in but YABU about saying she shouldn't have her child in a buggy.

I used to get funny looks pushing DS in his buggy when he was 2 as he looked 5 ( also used to get asked all the the why he wasn't at school!)

He was out of his buggy and walking or scooting long distances quite early but DD was stuck in hers until she was 4 as we had a two mile round trip to take DS to school. If I had had an extra hour to spare each morning to let her walk all the way ( stopping to pick up every flower, leaf or bit of interesting looking rubbish) I would have.

I don't think I have said that a 3 year old should never be in a buggy, most (>95%) of normally developing dcs will be walking by 18 months. That's a year and a half for them to learn to trot alongside an adult. I am expressing disbelief that most children can't learn to do this especially these days with bikes/scooters etc.

Why does it have to be an all in nothing thing?

My dc's were in and out of buggy's from walking to about 4. We also used a buggy board (which I have been slated for as it didn't give my 2 year old dd anywhere to rest).

Yes, they used a buggy, but they also walked alongside.

Sometime you have time to amble along, saying hello to snails and marvelling at the grass, but sometimes they're tired or you just have to get there.

I would love to hear from all these people who didn't use a buggy from 18 mths(or whatever) after they've spent a week without their car and not having left their children at home.

And how marvellous to live only 100 yards from everything you need. Really?!

Real life people, real life.

developmental windows and that a skill will take longer to aquire if the opportunity is not taken when the child is ready.

surely the key there is when the child is ready - all children are ready at different times, and you can no more get a child to crawl or walk or speak before they are going to do it than learn how to fly. A child might be physically 'ready' to walk, but not have the understanding or may have massive tantrums or get really tired because of health reasons. You make thw whole child development thing sound very easy and straightforward - and it, and life, are not.

Ha. When my first DC was a baby I was superior to all, whatever I was doing it was obviously the right thing. I looked down my nose at other parents I felt were doing it wrong. God, I was horrible.

Fast forward to now, three DC and I'm doing a few of the things I swore I never would . Using the pushchair with two year old DD is one of them. Ok so she's just over two, not four but it's still longer than I'd rather be using the contraption. We stopped using it bang on two years with DC 1&2. DC3 is a law unto herself. Tried walking for an hour with her the other day, 3/4 of the walk was her tantrumming, throwing herself on the floor and insisting we carry her. She's HEAVY. This is despite her insistence she wanted to walk and doesn't want the pushchair anymore. Grr. So I can foresee we won't be ditching it for another few months yet, maybe a year bloody hope not.

Must confess I still don't like seeing children in pushchairs they're practically falling out of, feet are walking along the floor with it but I've seen so much now almost five years into my parenting journey and with three very different DC I know not to judge.