To think that you should be able to opt out of chuggers coming to the door

[Gobbolinothewitchscat]

DH off out at a course last night.

I have bathed and settled 1 year old DS and 9 month old DD. DD teething, has a cold and hand foot and mouth so this is no easy feat.

Have just made myself some lovely spaghetti carbonara and am about to settle down to catch up on crap TV.

At 8:30pm, I have just got my arse on the sofas and am about to eat the first mouthful of my spaghetti when I am disturbed to put it mildly by some loud hammering on the door. I get up, and as I have not a sneered the door quickly enough within the 10 seconds expected-- the caller then starts ringing my very loud old Victorian bell so loudly that it nearly comes of the wire

By this stage, I've got the fright of my life and DD is screaming. I genuinely assume that something awful must have happened to DH and the police need it speak to me urgently. I then open the door to find a middle aged gentleman dressed in a red "Save the Children" jacket standing in my door step grinning at me. He then asks me if if he can speak to me about "The Children"?

I say NO! not fuck off, even though I feel like it but I'm so relieved that DH isn't under a lorry on the M60 that I'm feeling charitable I then said I had to go and settle DD again and shut the door

AIBU to think this is totally not on? It's like harassment - I feel like these chuggers are now ringing the bell really loudly to make people think it's super urgent that they answer the door.

At 10:30 once I have settled DD, chucked out my congealed spaghetti and made some toast, I cancelled my Save the Children monthly direct debit. Any suggestions for a children's charity that doesn't use these awful collection techniques? I'm not happy to be donating money to support this kind of thing.

This is just totally unacceptable. It's far far too late for a start to be knocking on people's doors. Just say you never sign up to anything on the doorstep and shut the door.

TheRealMaryMillington I had a similar one, they started by asking if I knew about a certain cancer, I said I did as my mum had just been diagnosed for the second time and she said, "that's good isn't it?"

I said no it isn't and shut the door.
Had another the other day for PDSA, I was in bed with flu, luckily my carer was here to answer.

YANBU. That is late to be knocking on people's doors for donations. It could frighten people, especially if they are alone or elderly.

I hate them so much. British Heart Foundation are the worst round here, they're so rude. I had some guy telling me how heart disease kills more people than all the cancers combined, so needs more support, blah blah... Which may have been true, but given my grandad had died the week before from bowel cancer, I didn't really give a shit.

Although I must admit, there was one guy came from Marie Curie, and when I said "oh, I'm not interested thanks", he said "that's ok, sorry to bother you" and left without arguing! Which was surprising, but a nice change.

I agree that something like the telephone preference service for chuggers would show that charities actually cared. Perhaps someone who is on twitter could tweet this to the NCVO?

I wouldn't mind if they were like avocado's Marie Curie guy - it's the fact that most don't simply leave when I tell them I'm not interested because we never give money at the door (we do it via CAF online). The one guy then starts with "I'm not asking for money, I want to tell you about...", as if my time is less precious to me than money.

Am I obliged to be polite to unsolicited callers at my door? I know that it feels wrong to be rude to them, but they are surely attempting to manipulate social norms in their favour, so they are already breaking the rules of good manners?

I can see you've got a sign but surely you don't want to miss your chance to show how desperately you care about the OAP disabled lesser-spotted Guatemalan newts with cancer don't you?"

double snort

We get these ones too, so desperately earnest, usually re:cancer no idea why cancer is more important here than any other worthy cause.

But just not really a good idea to ask me 'So what are you doing to combat cancer?' when I've lost various family members to it, have a sibling with it, as do I (I mean I have cancer) have worked in oncology for years as well as hospice care. And still work in the area.

I have to admit on a bad day, I have verbally vomited this information on a door chugger, and then asked how they thought fucking people off helped their charity???

yes yes I know they're just doing their job, but if I'd open the door and been asked ' would you like to donate to blah blah charity that helps people with cancer, I've have reached for my purse. (in-spite of sign)

The challenge of 'WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO COMBAT CANCER TODAY!!' Fucked me right off.

Yanbu, it should not be allowed to go to people's doors? It's not safe to just open your door to anyone too.
I wonder if this does really work because it's seems to be on the increase.

I wonder if this does really work because it's seems to be on the increase.
They can be very persistent, i bet there are some vulnerable people who have signed up because they felt it was the only way to get rid of them.
It's a horrible practice. You shouldn't feel bullied in your own home, which is what some of these chuggers do.

Most large charities are members of a trade body. Make a complaint to the body and the charity about the nature of the chugging. The trade body of course won't do anything other than send an apology email - although if the individual was rude or something there's a chance the contracted out guy will be moved on.

But it will cost them effort and money to respond, changing the economics of paying guys to molest you in your home. It will also mean that they can't use "but no-one complains" defence when more regulation is suggested. Do the same with political parties too..

If it's a small local charity they probably won't be, and you can just complain directly.

Save the children are part of www.pfra.org.uk/ so www.frsb.org.uk/complaints/make-a-complaint/online-complaints-form/ I think by calling after dark and banging on the door giving you a fright is enough to violate the rules.

there are loads of links if you Google no cold calling zones.

http://www.tradingstandards.gov.uk/policy/doorstopperswelcome.cfm?frmAlias=/doorstoppers/

I have no cold calling sign and it does work. I relented and got one coz I was sick of the religious callers. It is a pain that we have to put up a sign telling people that we don't want to be bothered in our houses by people selling things whether that be products, services or religions.

I've often pondered on making a coin-operated doorbell ...

That's an excellent idea LurkingHusband - or even a coin operated gate, with refunds given to all welcome visitors and anyone who hasn't contravened the conditions.

I have a spy hole. If I see them, I don't answer the door and tell them to fuck off.

I wonder, has anyone ever heard of anyone who likes chuggers? You know, people whose face lights up when a chugger knocks at the door and they ask them in, make them a cup of tea and say "so glad you called, I really wanted to set up a direct debit and didn't know how to, I've been waiting the whole month for someone to come around and tell me about cancer." Because I don't know anyone like that. Everyone hates them, even jehova's witnesses get a better reception. So the only way they make money is by harassment and guilt tripping people into signing up. It's annoying and when there are vulnerable people involved it's unscrupulous. I wish charities got the picture but I don't see that happening.

It's hideous. Last night as I was running very late a woman knocked on my door and proceeded to show me a folder full of photographs of Syrian children. I was very polite until I told her she had to step back because she had actually crossed my threshold.

Worst of all is, I suspect she wasn't from a charity but a scammer.

There are plenty of very nice 'no soliciting' signs that wouldn't ruin the looks of a front door, from simple brass plaques (v understated) to be-ribboned, painted wooden plaque 'rhymes' (cutesy).

But I agree even those only deter a percentage of them.

Actually, OP, I think this sign has a certain style, non?

Offer to help them with their PPI claims . . .

mardy I was trying to give a helpful suggestion, no need to be defensive.

I rarely hear unexpected callers because my doorbell has no batteries in and my land line is not plugged in. I might occasionally hear someone banging on the door. Friends and people delivering stuff always text or ring my mobile to let me know they are at the door. I am a little bit of a recluse to be fair.

I have a well lit sign on my gate that reads "My dogs are not vegetarians". This seems to do the trick.

I am currently googling tasteful wooden signs that say FUCK OFF!

Please do let me know if you find any .

I have tweeted Save the Children twice but no response.

Will defo look at complaining to the trade body so thank you for kia king