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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Letting fireworks off in our garden.

292 replies

raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 12:38

Yesterday I was letting some, admittedly large, fireworks off in our garden at about 7pm. Fireworks were going vertically upwards and not into neighbours gardens.

Anyway all hell breaks loose. Guy comes out of his house screaming at my DH that he is a "fucking nobhead" and starts banging on our gate which was padlocked.

I went back into the house and locked the front door. Went upstairs to son's bedroom. Window was open as I had been painting sons walls earlier. and curtains had been removed due to the DIY.

Next thing he is shouting at me "oi you, fucking nobhead at the window". By this time the neighbours 2 doors down, who cannot stand me, had come out and were joining in on the trouble.

I replied "go away or I will phone the police" as there was now a small crowd at the front gate. I then shut the window and turned the light off in the room.

Next thing the guy jumped the fence and came in garden banging on front door. I did not answer the door.

They hung around at the front gate for about 15 minutes then got bored and dispersed.

I can appreciate that they may not like fireworks as they may have pets that could have been scared. However another neighbour set some fireworks off (far more than I did) and no-one complained.

Not sure what to do now.

OP posts:
Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 21:09

I answered about Uni because someone assumed I am a student. I guess I am a part time student at the moment because I am doing my accountancy exams.
I do not think I am particularly rough, but that is subjective so others may view me differently.

OP posts:
TeaForTara · 30/10/2014 21:10

OP: AIBU or is my neighbour?
MN: His reaction was OTT but YABVU
OP: No I'm not!

Preciousbane · 30/10/2014 21:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mynewpassion · 30/10/2014 21:13

My impression is that rough areas would be more ok with fireworks than a more nicer area.

lemisscared · 30/10/2014 21:18

You may not be rough, but you are bloody inconsiderate, oh and surely if you are studying accountancy, you should know that spending £19.99 on something that goes offf in seconds is NOT sound economic sense.

Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 21:23

You seem very antagonistic lemi. Husband bought the firework and I told him when he brought it home that we are trying to economise and I was not happy he had spent all that cash.

OP posts:
SDTGisASpookyWoooolefGenius · 30/10/2014 21:29

One of our neighbours let off a single firework last night - it was a really big explosion - and my poor dog leapt out of her skin, and spent an hour trembling, next to me on the couch.

I am dreading this weekend and next weekend, and it's bad enough on those weekends around Bonfire night - when they are going off on week nights too, it is beyond a joke.

And I love fireworks - I really enjoy watching good displays - but my poor dog has ruptured anterior cruciate ligaments in both hind legs - the last thing I need is for her to freak out, because she could do herself even more damage.

I think you were very unreasonable to let off a huge firework in a small garden on a midweek night. Your neighbour's reaction was aggressive and unpleasant, and I understand why you were scared and upset. He was more in the wrong than you were, but you need to stop letting off explosives in a residential area.

lemisscared · 30/10/2014 21:33

You don't have to justify your DH's actions to me OP, maybe you are defensive because you know YABU?

Antagonistic? no, just utterly pissed off with people letting off explosives in built up areas, well anywhere really.

Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 21:34

As I said lemi I might be rough. It is a very subjective term and what I view as rough may be different to other people.

OP posts:
lemisscared · 30/10/2014 21:34

To be fair your neighbour sounds like a thug, but i would be mighty pissed off too! although im only ever antagonistic behind the safety of my laptop

lemisscared · 30/10/2014 21:36

don't worry, I am rough as fuck myself (can't you tell!)

Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 21:36

No you are antagonistic.

I said before that I realise with hindsight it was unreasonable, I am not trying to justify it at all.

I am not justifying DHs actions to anyone. I pulled him over the firework as I am doing my best to save money and he keeps spending it.

OP posts:
Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 21:43

hahaha you made me laugh with that one!

When I first glanced at your RAF comment I thought you were referring to air pilots.

I am not sure if I am rough or not. I come from a family where dad had a professional job and mum had her own business. However dad did not really behave in a "nice middle class way". He was always getting into fisticuffs with neighbours when I was growing up and got sacked from one job for knocking his boss unconscious. Although he had money I would describe him as rough, because he swore a lot and started a lot of fist fights.

My mum was born on a council estate and was not violent but if anyone got on the wrong side of her they would get a massive earbashing. She even had a pop at several teachers at school.

I guess it all boils down to what you define as rough. I could be, I do not know.

I think I only ever got in Uni as I was the only person who had applied to the college from a comprehensive and the college I went to is very left-wing.

OP posts:
ChelsyHandy · 30/10/2014 21:49

Maybe you are used to areas with large secluded gardens and houses spaced well apart from each other then OP?

I'm just really astonished that it wouldn't occur to an adult that setting off loud, repeating fireworks in their garden on a random Wednesday night in the middle of a housing estate wouldn't cause annoyance to their neighbours. Its the sort of thing you would expect teenagers to do, and then learn from.

You do realise that if your neighbours had phoned the police and made a complaint, there is a small chance you could have been charged with breach of the peace and, as an accountant, you would have been up before your professional body? That has surely been explained to you in your degree, in a course on professional practice or similar.

lemisscared · 30/10/2014 21:51

Well thanks for that potted history of your life, I think you are trying too hard now Wink Shall we just agree that letting stupidly loud, stupidly expensive fireworks off in a residential area is well, stupid, and that you wont do it again? even if you can afford it.

Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 22:04

I am not an accountant. I am just doing my training exams in the hope it will help me running my business.

OP posts:
soph123kay · 30/10/2014 22:15

omg theres some miserable ppl on here its a firework for gods sake shes not throwing live grenades around!! id go and set the rest off just to piss them off even more!

lemisscared · 30/10/2014 22:17

^THAT that is antagonistic

Sirzy · 30/10/2014 22:20

Soph I assume you haven't read the thread?

Even the op has seen she was unreasonable to set off the firework

soph123kay · 30/10/2014 22:22

so was her neighbors reactions!! its 1 firework and people are going mad about her not measuring her garden etc! im sure Tesco wouldn't sell them if they were powerful display fireworks. i buy them every year for my daughter and i will do again this year.

Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 22:23

Sirzy is right. I feel really bad about letting the firework off.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 30/10/2014 22:25

Do you bother to read the instructions on them Soph and make sure they are set off exactly right including distances?

A trip to an a and e in the coming week will show why home displays, especially those with rediculously big fireworks are a bad idea

soph123kay · 30/10/2014 22:25

i have read the tread but i think people are really over reacting she could have set the whole box off if she wanted even the police said she wasn't breaking the law it was 7 in the evening so i cannot see what she has done wrong? if they wasnt intended to be set off in gardens then why is tesco selling them.

Original poster
raltheraffe · 30/10/2014 22:26

Jumping my fence and shouting abuse at my disabled husband is totally out of order. I am not trying to justify letting the firework off, however his behaviour was totally unacceptable.

OP posts:
soph123kay · 30/10/2014 22:27

yes i do read the instructions and my partner sets them off while me and my daughter stand at a safe distance or we get up kitchen window to watch.