To not want any gifts?

[iwantgin]

Am I?

As Christmas approaches- I want to broach the idea of no adult gifting. Just stuff for the DC cash

My reasons are :

a) I don't need anything. If I did, I would go out and buy it myself
b) I don't want anything. As above.
c) I am very particular. Unless I specify the precise model number of the item I am bound to be disappointed.

d) I am trying to live with less 'stuff'. Am still trying to use up last year's glut of toiletries.

e) I don't want to be asked what I want. Nothing.

DH thinks I am being a drama llama about it. DM and DF think the same. PIL would be upset and not want to leave me out.

Ask for a meal out? Spa treatment?

You could ask for gin?

ask for vouchers, that way when you DO want or need something, you can go and get it, and everyone's happy

Good suggestions.

We do vouchers already with SIL and BIL. We send them vouchers, they send us some. It seems a bit daft really.

Gin would be only thing that I really, really want :)

Ask for edibles or drink.

we do secret santa with the adults in my family. It's worked really well because you can actually think about the person you're buying for and buy them suitable. We set a limit (£10 usually)

Just gin. Then you'll have enough bottles to last you until NYE

I'm the same.

DP is paying for another tattoo for my birthday. Apart from a few DVDs/books/CDs coming out there's nothing I need/want.

Last year I suggested no gifts to the in laws. They agreed. Then ignored it. They spend a fortune on stuff we don't want. I sound ungreatful but I put a lot of thought into the gifts I had to buy last minute...

That's a good idea - Secret Santa.

Me and Dsis have already agreed not to bother getting each other gifts. Might try and do SS with the rest of them.

Hmmmmm

What about smellies or candles? Stuff that gets used?

Could you, by way of a start, agree with BIL and SIL not to exchange vouchers? I agree with you that that is just daft.

SIL and I agreed a few years ago that we would just do presents for the children. We were in a similar position to you in that we were just swapping bottles of booze.

Yanbu, I'm exactly the same!
I don't want to offend people by saying "I only like x brand" because it's very expensive so I buy it myself. I don't want for anything and not good at pretending to like random tat!

I don't think you are being unreasonable, I think a no gift or charity gift Christmas can work really well if everyone is signed up to it but I don't think this issue is worth making waves over. What about theatre or experiential voucher gifts that won't add to your collection of stuff?

kingjoffrey that's the thing. Everyone has to be in agreement for it to work.

This must be a first world problem. ;)

Am going to promote the Secret Santa idea - I think most of the family are coming to mine this Xmas anyway - so that would work well.

Next task is to get them to ask DC directly what they want- instead of asking me. cash

I am pleased IANBtooU.

Thanks for all suggestions.

Seriously, Gin is a good suggestion. Dh gets the same whiskey every year-he's always delighted.
People like giving gifts and it's the thought that counts.
Just donate to charity shop/food bank if it's something you don't want-they take sealed toiletries.
It was ok to politely suggest no gifts, but if that ideas has been rejected, then I'm afraid you have to suck it up.

oh i feel the very same this year, i can't put my finger on why exactly as have never felt this way before!

secret santa or a a limit on spends sounds best.

I'm the same, YANBU. Our house has everything necessary for civilised living, I've got enough clothes to see me out. I've a job every Christmas to persuade my dh not to get me anything, other than one bar of rose soap!

My dear sis and I have an agreement not to get pressies. But every Christmas she sends out quite a large sum to my dh's African family (an enormous clan of about 60 people) to help with their poverty and squalor. We too send money transfers for them. When you see how they live, you feel totally guilty wallowing in consumerism!

I think a nice card ( esp a funny one, which my sis is excellent at finding) with loving words inside is worth all the pressies in the world.

hatespiders That puts things into perspective.

I'd be totally chuffed to have donkey or something sponsored on my behalf as a gift.

I've done this for some of DS's friends.

Our Women's Friendly Hour (I know, but it's a tiny Norfolk village still in the 1950's) has a Christmas Lucky Dip where we each buy a little something for £2 or less. It's surprising what you can find for such a small sum. And we have a good laugh too. One dear old soul bought a packet of corn plasters (beautifully gift-wrapped) as her contribution.

If you know people would be upset by it, like your in laws, then I think it would be quite mean to say you don't want to swap gifts.

If you don't want to receive anything then ask for vouchers and set a strict budget on what you spend on others, but don't try and stop other people from giving and receiving gifts.

It does get a bit silly.

My brother gives me twenty quid.

Which i spend on buying him a gift.

I have asked for chutney this year, as i use loads of the stuff.

Just think of a consumable you actually use and ask for that.

Do adults actually ask for gifts? How mercenary.