AIBU to do whatever I like to my fence?

[SunnaStrangeInTheNeighbourhood]

Or rather is DH BU?

Last summer we replaced our tatty 6ft fence with a brand new one. It's a very long garden and that side was looking horribly bare. We have planted shrubs and flowers in beds down the side but it was still looking a bit naked because we'd had to remove a lot of established bushes and shrubs to do the fence.

DH scrounged was given some lightweight barbed wire left over from a friend's project and has been hammering it to the fence along the top and in loops and curls up and down with the intention of growing some climbing plants along it. It will also make it harder for random burglars to climb over the fence, he said. 3 years ago a potential burglar scaled all the fences down the lane and tried all the back doors, so it's not entirely silly to think it could happen.

NDN is worried about his cat getting hurt. Said cat hardly ever comes in our garden because we shout at it or squirt it with water. Until we moved in it had used it as an outside toilet. 4 years of discouragement means we hardly see it any more.

Cats aren't stupid so I think it may have encountered barbed wire before (we live in a village surround by farm land) and will have learned to avoid it or tiptoe round it. He wants us to remove it but "doesn't want to fall out over it". Dh has said he doesn't want to fall out either but it's staying.

NDN's wife says he's being ridiculous. He is isn't he?

cross posting again.

Elsie, neighbours wife thinks he's mad not us. She thinks it's fine.

Barbed wire is ugly and not ideal for training plants up. However, a fox got tangled in next doors plant mesh so cats will get tangled in anything you put up there. I stapled some lengths of string to our fence and am growing passion flower up it which works well. Personally I would take the barbed wire down. You don't want an angry neighbour banging on the door demanding a hefty vet's bill is paid.

'I think it's not the best idea and I wouldn't do it.'

Look, you don't like it, your neighbour doesn't like it, a sample group of people you asked online don't like it and the only reason your DH likes it is because it was free.

Does it really need to be spelt out any more?

The fact that it is free is no justification for using it.

It looks like mumsnetters are unanimous in saying how unreasonable it is yet you keep defending your husband's unreasonableness.

Surely, common sense would indicate that out of 100+ posts where everyone says YABU that perhaps your husband is in the wrong?

Dh is reconsidering. He likes a good mull over. He is coming round to the idea that the plants may not find it friendly.

There's barbed wire all around in the field, as I've said before, so if the neighbour's cat got hurt by some it probably wouldn't be on ours anyway, so I'm not anticipating any vet's bills. Impossible to prove.

No, just no. Barbed wire looks awful, it's dangerous and it's useless as a support for climbing plants.

I'm another who has some nasty scars after falling from a pony onto a barbed wire fence - it really is nasty stuff and causes horrible injuries.

Also, just because your neighbour couldn't prove your wire injured his cat doesn't mean you can have a clear conscience - wouldn't you feel even the tiniest bit guilty if the cat was hurt and it was possibly your fault?

I'm with your neighbour. It's not just his cat either, it's other cats and all kinds of wildlife. My cat had all the fur ripped off his leg because of barbed wire, it has no place on residential properties. It gives me the rage tbh. If you're concerned about burglars, lock your doors and get an alarm.

We live in the country. There is barbed wire everywhere.

Is that how your justifying it to yourself? It doesn't matter if it's everywhere. If someone or something gets injured on YOUR barbed wire, then that is on you.

I love a freebie too but honestly a pack of vine eyes and some wire is not going to set you back very much at all.

I've replaced two 6' fences on either side this spring. Two lengths of wire across the whole fence at 2' intervals, a couple of vine eyes and you're done. I don't think I spent more than £5 at Wilkinson It's easy to tuck the plants under the wire to steer their growth, or use a little twine to tie them in.

Be aware your wisteria etc may not give proper coverage until the second year, so you would be stuck looking at the 'abstract' barbed wire. I replanted this spring (because of the fences) and my climbers, though settled, are in no way covering the fence. I will have to wait until next year (or beyond) to get decent coverage. In the meantime the wire I've applied blends into the fence.

Please reconsider the barbed wire. It's not good for any wildlife. Birds are great for controlling slugs and pests in your garden and the smaller ones will perch or even nest in your climbers. You want to encourage not maim them!

Please continue to discourage the cat with nonviolent methods. The cat can't read signs nor will it know what you've concealed

So what. We live in the country where there is barbed wire everywhere, just not in people's gardens.

Why are you being so obtuse?

I used to sell barbed wire; we provided customers with little warning signs to display to the public/neighbours.

Bunbaker read what's already been said, why don't you? There is a barbed wire fence (belonging to the farmer) running along the back of all the residential gardens in the lane, including ours. Not being obtuse at all.

As long as you're aware that if the car gets injured you would be liable for any vet fees. Our cunt of a former neighbour put gripper rod of his. The cat was hurt and they had to pay. Moved not long after. Yay.

It wouldn't be impossible to prove if you had to try to untangle a cat, or the corpse of one, from the barbed wire in your garden.

Had a cat in at work this week with barbed wire wounds-not pretty.
It's not just cats you're putting at risk OP, those little birds you're fond of could also easily get injured once your barbed wire is nicely camouflaged with plants.
Stupidest idea I've ever heard.

Unusual, chilling? Have you made a study of me? I think that's a bit weird tbh

^ Don't flatter yourself. I merely read a post and think and look at the posters name, often it's yours. So often in fact that I recognise your name

I live in the country too and there's plenty of barbed wire, I still wouldn't have it in my garden.

I'm waiting for the mil thread:

"AIBU to refuse to take my children to visit my in-laws because they have barbed wire on the inside of their fences, hidden behind climbers. They say it's ok because the children will play on the lawn on the other side of the path"

I suspect a unanimous YANBU on that one

I've never seen barbed wire in any countryside garden op. The whole idea is ridiculous and very odd to be honest. The wire being hidden by clematis in a year or 2 is not only optimistic but also even more dangerous as no one will know the barbed wire is underneath. I wouldn't want to be your neighbour and would be doing everything possible to get it removed if I were them.

Is it wildlife friendly?... presuming it becomes covered and obscured by trailing plants, what if birds/squirrels were to get themselves tangled? Sounds like a bad idea to me.

I give up. OP, you were obviously hoping we would all agree with you and say how horrid and VVU your neighbour was being. As we aren't, you're stomping around going lalalalalalala with your hands over your ears.
I'm out.

Sorry, I cross posted with aliennation.

Oh FFS - You are not worried about being landed with vet's bills because the NND wouldn't be able to prove the cat hurt itself on your barbed wire? What's wrong with you? Why aren't you just worried about the cat being hurt? Jeez, I just don't get some people.