To think toddlers don't need shoes to go with each outfit

[kiki0202]

DS has 3 pairs of shoes 1 white adidas trainers 1 pair of smart-ish navy boots and 1 pair of wellys for park/garden/walks. MIL thinks he needs more shoes as the shoes he has don't go with everything she wants to buy him brown boots and blue trainers I said no as I don't see the need for it at all I think 3 pairs is plenty and more than some kids have. She is now totally offended that I've refused her kind offer and saying I'm ungrateful. I just don't see the need for it and don't need yet more shoes to store I did tell her he's growing out of his current clothes size and if she was looking for something to buy he needs everything except shoes to which she told DP that I'm being bossy.

So hit me should I have just said yes to the shoes? I wasn't rude just said he doesn't need anymore shoes she said they don't go with his clothes-yes they do-- I said he's growing out of his clothes so if you want to buy him something you could get him clothes he needs everything. MIL and I usually get along really well I like her but think she's a bit flashy and that's not really me. DP would happily sort it out but I prefer to deal with her myself through the good and the bad she's usually very reasonable.

She just wants the pleasure of buying her Grandson shoes ffs.

He doesn't "need" them no. But why say no! Poor woman.

My MIL buys my DDs things they don't need ALL the time. And my Mum buys them tonnes of plastic toys which I hate but she's not buying them for me!

I say thank you...and how kind...and that's that!

I'd have just given her the next size up. If offered a gift its polite to decline before its bought but not to say i don't want x buy you can buy me y. If DS did that when offered a gift he would be told off in no uncertain terms.

I like matching shoes to outfits so would have been more than happy to have extras and would have given them to the charity shop after so that they got used again after.

This must be a new thing, surely? When I was a child, I generally had one pair of shoes at a time depending on the season. Possibly two pairs in overlapping times. I think that was pretty standard. Children grow so quickly, five pairs of shoes for a 3-year-old seems like a lot to me.

I agree with a PP, though. If your MIL has her heart set on buying shoes for your son, ask for the next size up. Win win.

I don't think he needs them but if MIL wants to buy them then there's no harm in it. So long as she doesn't expect your undying gratitude.
I'm afraid I don't get the whole "things go with things" thing. Shoes go with feet.

more money than sense springs to mind. he is a toddler who cares. mine had 1 pair of shoes and some wellies i think.

better use of money would be savings for his future

SO just an update MIL has called and said she's sorry she over reacted she had an argument with exhusbad (FIL) about BIL (15) and basically took it out on me.

She's buying him jeans which he really needs. We don't have much money so having 5 pairs on shoes when his trousers are up his legs just seems crazy to me.

I work with a girl who went to Clark's the other week and bought her DD 5 pairs of shoes. £129. She's 18 months. I was openly flabbergasted. My DD has one pair and some wellies.

Toddlers don't need shoes to go with every outfit, yanbu!
Dd has only got wellies and one pair of shoes from Clarks, that's plenty especially with how quickly her feet grow at the moment

Unless you are quite well off than no they don't need heaps of shoes. Clarks shoes cost £30 a time

My ds3 has a pair of Clarks shoes fitted every 6 months in a colour that will go with everything and a pair of wellies for jumping in all those puddles. In the summer he will have a pair of Clarks and a pair of sandals. Toddlers grow out of everything so quick.

Glad it's sorted, I tend to go for one decent pair of £40 shoes, a pair of wellies and some boots if we have any spare ££. They grow out of them fast enough anyway!

Confused, it's all relative thought isn't it. Some people spend that much socialising for the weekend or on wine for the month. At least the shoes will last six months so better value for money.

I don't think they need a lot of shoes, but I also don't think there's any harm in letting her buy him a couple pair if she wants to. Sometimes you have to pick your battles, and this is one I wouldn't have picked. If he outgrows them, you can donate them or sell them.

Considering Op Toddler needs all new clothes I can't see why she can't buy something useful if she wants to buy something.

Nope. Mine has proper shoes and wellies and that's it.
She is two. She has no need of any more shoes.
I get a bit judgy pants with people who buy 6 pairs of crappy shoes for their toddlers so they 'match' instead of buying a decent pair of properly fitted shoes.

Gosh. When they were very young, my toddlers only ever had one pair of standard Clarks shoes which worked for summer and winter. As they got older they also had wellies and then maybe Doodles.

My son has loads of trainers in different colours, 2 pairs of wellies,canvas trainers

But then again I have 10 pairs of just hi tops. I like shoes and so does he. He doesn't need them but we like them.

I wouldn't make a big deal about someone buying him something

I love buying clothes for DS (3) but at any onetime he only has 1 pair of trainers (I get neutral colours like navy/grey/black), 1 pair of wellies and in the summer 1 pair of sandals. Shoes are quite pricey and if he had several pairs or 'every day' shoes, I know I wood just end up putting him in the same pair every day (the easiest ones to get on in a hurry!) and the other ones would not really get worn.

Having said that, if someone was buying him shoes, I would never object!

That should say several pairs of every day shoes.

YANBU! I've wondered this too. DD (21 months) has always just had the one pair of shoes, until the last month when we got her some wellies for the winter, and a pair of trainers that were 75% off and too adorable to pass up But that's it. I just can't see why she needs more and though some of the little shoes are adorable, they grow out of them so fast anyway!

Nursery insist on inside and outside shoes and we also have wellies. I do sometimes use the nursery inside shoes at weekends if they match the outfit he's wearing and then wash/disinfect the soles prior to a Monday. I am a fan of Navy for DS and it seems to go okay with most stuff.

What do people find to be the most versatile colour of girls shoe?

dd2 is 3
she has wellies, slippers, both canvas shoes and leather shoes in summer, and generally just a pair of suede boots that go with everything in winter. she has some sparkly party shoes at the moment, which were a birthday present, but we won't rush to replace them

we have wellies for winter, imitation crocs for summer, trainers for sport and smart school shoes. Mostly they are all hand me downs with the exception of the smart school shoes

Glad you got it sorted. This would really have bugged me as it's so wasteful and silly.

Do some people's toddlers not grow?

When ds was a toddler I took him to have his feet measured every 6 weeks and he would always have grown and need new shoes.

So he always only had one pair of properly fitted shoes and maybe some wellies or doodles according to the time of year.

Hugo - mine have only changed size about once a year. So first shoes just over 1 would last until past 2 years, next lot he's only just outgrowing now at 3 1/2