To be upset over lack of birthday card...

[CheeseAndBeans]

So, today it's my birthday, not a special one but the first as a mummy - my DD is 10 months old. My DP forgot to get me a card from her! Feel really upset, I know it's only a card but it was my first chance to get a "happy birthday mummy" card. Have told him I am upset- I was actually in tears, couldn't help it, now he feels really bad. AIBU to be in a mood with him? We have a lovely family day planned, but now am just in a bad mood that I can't shift!!

Haha fudgeface
No, didn't drop hints. As I said, just assumed he would! (As per other occasions where he has) Thought it was done thing, would appear not though from lots here.

Yanbu however a lot of people just don't think!

My first baby was 8 weeks old on my first mothers day. My dp did bugger all for me, but ran around like a blue arse fly getting things for his mum, made sure she got 'nana' gifts! I was in bits, it is hurtful, but just lack of thought!

I don't get why you would waste money on a card from someone who would prefer to eat it than write in it...

But still, if that's your thing, and it what you guys do in your family then Yanbu I guess. Happy birthday OP

Yanbu. I would have been upset too. But then that's what we do in this house, even our dog gets a card from the DCs on his birthday.

OP Why not get OH to take a really nice photo of you and DD and get a frame that has "Mummy" on it. Then you can display it proudly.

Tali, what a lovely idea. Definatley going to do that!

Happy birthday!

But honestly, are you sure you are not just spoiling for a fight?

Enjoy your lovely family day together. In a year or two she will be making you lovely cards with mushed up bits of tissue and dried pasta stuck on. You will treasure them way more that something she knows nothing about.

Yanbu

A little bit of thought would be nice....

You'll get a card and little gift from her next year I bet

Do not let it spoil your day though....you have said your bit,

Happy birthday

It's not the actual card that's upset you. It's the lack of thought behind it, from someone who is supposed to care.

YANBU
Make a big fuss about how it's upset you, so that he remembers in future.

Yanbu.

In my experience, although there are exceptions, a lot of men just don't get this kind of thing. It doesn't matter that your child didn't write in the card, doesn't even know it's your birthday - it's about you as a new mum.

You were right to say something, but try to put it to one side and enjoy your special day.

I would say a lot of people don't think like that.

DH always did panicked fingerprinting at dawn with uncomprehending babies to make remembered a card. I might remember if I was feeling soppyish.

You have gifts, and a day to enjoy, I don't think that seems like lack of thought or care.

It's not the actual card that's upset you. It's the lack of thought behind it, from someone who is supposed to care.

He got her a card and lovely presents she says. They've got a nice family day out planned.
Supposed to care? He sounds totally fine to me. A good guy.

Jeez some of you are hard going.

pictish, I agree!

Agree with pictish. It does sound as if he made an effort, but forgot this one thing, and he's very sorry. I feel a bit sorry for him. However much you love your children, it's not something that would mean that much to everyone, and if it didn't for him, then it probably didn't realise it was that big a deal. My DH is much softer hearted about things like that than I am. This wouldn't have bothered me at all. I'm not saying you're wrong to be upset, just that I don't think he's really at fault either. He probably had no idea it meant that much to you.

Try to put it behind you and have a lovely day.

YANBU

DH got me one To Mummy From Your Little Girl.

the glaring error is that my DC has a willy

I made sure OH knew I expected a Mother's day card and a Birthday card from LO.

In-fact I even set him up on Moonpig so he could "be creative"

But yep I did have to tell him... blatantly.

Out of interest did you get a Mother's Day card in March?

YANBU at all, I too would have been upset. I know to some people cards aren't a big deal but in our household they are (give good luck, congrats, bday, Xmas cards Etc etc) and I would be v upset if my dh forgot to give me a card from our baby son.

It's my dh bday tomorrow and he has a "hand written" card from our baby as well as a superman mug with pics of him and his wee boy!

Anyway I understand why u are upset but it's not worth ruining a lovely family day. Plus he's never going to forget again now is he!!

Happy birthday and enjoy ur day

Personally, I wouldn't have got upset over that, but each to their own. I can't remember now if DH got me a card from DS when I had my first birthday as a mother (DS would have been nearly one at the time). I don't think he did and I probably would have thought it was a bit pointless to buy a card just from the baby. But if you really wanted one, it could have been worth dropping hints. It sounds like he's been lovely to you on your birthday otherwise.

I don't really see the point of having to explicitly explain that you would like a card from your baby on your birthday or Mother's Day. Dropping hints is ok but full on demanding isn't imo. You might as well go and buy one yourself and write in it!

Ok I confess I didn't rtft properly. Yes if he made an effort then you may have to forgive this one oversight.

Yanbu to be a bit disappointed but you have a lovely day planned for you. Your DH has chosen, bought and wrapped lovely presents for you. He has chosen and written a card from him to you. You get to spend the day with your baby daughter and a man who loves you. There's so much to be thankful for and to enjoy there that it out weighs a small slip up. Next year he'll know and remember. This year, let it go.

Happy birthday, hope you have a good day.

Happy Birthday.
It's ok to feel upset... But sometimes people (well, men!) need prompting.
My DH didn't get me a first time Mother's Day card from our then 5 month old son. I was very hurt and upset.