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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To just want to cry / give her away!!!

52 replies

curiousgeorgie · 14/10/2014 22:34

When DD2 was born it was hard. She was the worst eater, sleeper, constantly cried and made our lives a misery.

It lasted until about a month ago.

We have just got back from Florida (Sunday) and its actual hell. She has been up from around now until 6am each day and I can't cope.

DD1 (4) is jet lagged too, but has to be in school nursery every morning. DH is amazing but is starting a new job this week and really can't go in knackered.

I feel like I might die.

OP posts:
scrappydappydoo · 14/10/2014 23:49

Wow thats brought me back - i remember getting so angry at anyone who had sleep. I was completely irrational.
Crazy suggestions:
is there a creche or something nearby you could leave her at for a couple of hours. Even if you napped in the car outside?
Second the option of going to drs - could have a burst ear drum from flight ( grasps at straws) but they might be able to help you.
Have you tried giving her a filling meal before bed - I found mine slept a bit longer after a bowl of weetabix.
Hang in there!

puntasticusername · 14/10/2014 23:49

It sounds awful. SUPPORT SUPPORT SUPPORT SUPPORT SUPPORT Smile Thanks Thanks

MrsCakesPrecognition · 15/10/2014 00:12

Just a thought, but could she have picked up a bug or ear infection during the flight? Would a dose of calpol be worth a try to see if she has got some discomfort meaning she can't settle?

agoodbook · 15/10/2014 09:41

Talk to your doctor !!!- 30 years ago our friends daughter did this from birth, doctor gave them knock out drops to make her sleep -are they allowed to do that now? (later when she got older they found she had only 1 functioning kidney and had had loads of kidney infections......)

londonrach · 15/10/2014 09:50

How last night go op

Surfsup1 · 15/10/2014 09:59

I did a whole trip to Australia which I barely remember due to DS1 never getting over his jet lag. He slept 45 mins at a time for the WHOLE trip. Apparently i threw a party and caught up with lots of friends - I know this because people took photos. I was so tired I actually started hallucinating!

Maybe speak to you GP about using melatonin to reset her body clock?

Swimming and lots of sunshine through the day really helps (pay someone else to do this for you if necessary - it's SOOO worth it!)

Surfsup1 · 15/10/2014 10:04

There are also some miracle working night nanny/maternity nurses out there. I'm all for throwing all resources at this sort of issue - whatever it takes!!

Bardette · 15/10/2014 10:09

Could you go to gp and ask if you can use antihistamines to reset her body clock? Second the idea of swimming and sunshine today

Original poster
curiousgeorgie · 15/10/2014 10:11

Thanks everyone, she finally went to sleep at 5 and got up at 8 so I'm hoping I can keep her active today and try and turn it around...

It does always seem worse when you're in the middle of it. I feel better today, just tired!

OP posts:
Original poster
curiousgeorgie · 15/10/2014 10:12

There's no sunshine here today, it's totally grey, but we've just been for a walk and will go again to pick DD up from nursery in about an hour.

OP posts:
HavanaSlife · 15/10/2014 10:12

Ds4 is like this whenever we go away and thats just to Mablethorpe! Last time it was 2 weeks before he finalky settled back into a routine, though it did start to get better after the 4th day.

Its fucking awful being so tired, especially when you have another little one to take care of in the day.

Dh taking them after work so you can sleep is a good idea, my dp would take ds4 from 4 oclock for a

couple of hours before work when things got realky bad.
I hope things get better for you soon

skylark2 · 15/10/2014 10:20

georgie you do sound a bit better, I was quite worried reading the first half of the thread. And she's had a decent chunk of sleep at night - hopefully it'll start coming back together now.

Just remember that if you really can't handle it, put baby in cot, shut door, go make a cup of tea and relax weep for half an hour. Baby will be fine.

I agree with you that sleep deprivation is horrific. Absolutely get your DH to take her for a couple of hours when he gets home or before he leaves. He can't go in knackered but you can't function on zero sleep, there needs to be a compromise where he's a bit tired and you're functioning.

Embolio · 15/10/2014 10:23

Just sympathy here, it's dreadful isn't it? Ds2 is 15 months and slept through on mon night for the first time ever. He made up for it by waking about a million times last night. He does the writhing around screaming thing too when horribly over tired. Dreadful. Hope tonight better, i guess you've tried calpol etc incase teeth/bug?

SwearySwearyQuiteContrary · 15/10/2014 10:29

Has she ever been investigated for glue ear? It's absolutely excruciating for kids with glue ear to lie down for long periods of time. Grommets really helped my 3.

Original poster
curiousgeorgie · 15/10/2014 10:32

She's been quite thoroughly checked over as she just cried for the first year of her life, and her skin is so rashy. But they always just say allergies and I follow the advice but nothing changes.

OP posts:
Surfsup1 · 15/10/2014 10:41

Have you spoken to a natropath about a diet to help her gut? It can make a massive difference to small children with allergies especially when it's a bit early to be very clear about what exactly the allergies are. A good probiotic is a great place to start but getting some help to heal her gut and calm her immune system can REALLY help.

Surfsup1 · 15/10/2014 10:43

Oh, and it doesn't have to be a natropath if you have a doctor who is savvy about these things but so few are as it's a relatively recent accepted area among the conventional medical establishment, but natropaths etc have been onto it for yonks.

Chumpster · 15/10/2014 12:22

Hello. Loads of sympathy, lack of sleep saps the enjoyment out of life totally and is a nightmare. And it's really horrible having a baby who just seems unhappy. My friend got some sort of sedative from the pharmacist. Another friend's GP recommended anti-hystamine. I'd go down that route if I was you. It's got to be better (for everyone) than you being completely exhausted. Well done at holding it all together so far!!

juliascurr · 15/10/2014 12:34

make note of sleep/wake time. if regular, wake her up 15 mins earlier every day until pattern is manageable
this might work but it might not
it will pass

(but it is unspeakable while it lasts)

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 15/10/2014 13:34

Homeopathic lycopodium. Now, I fully realise that homeopathy is bollocks, but it worked for us. DD slept for 9 hours the first time, having not slept for longer than 2 hours since birth.

ireallydontlikemonday · 15/10/2014 13:39

It took my twins a couple of weeks to get back to their normal pattern of sleep after a trip to the USA this summer and it was bloody hard. They seemed to think that going to bed at 7 was just for a nap and were up for hours in the middle of the night.

You have my sympathies, but unfortunately I think you just had to ride it out until she resets her body clock.

codandchipstwice · 15/10/2014 13:49

I may get flamed for this but DS2 was similar and I wen tot the GP in desperation for me thinking I had PND but GP reckoned it was just sleep deprivation. He gave me many bottles of Phenergan to use, and it would just get DS to sleep for about 3 or 4 hours straight - and the difference to us both was amazing.

I do wonder, however, whether there might be somereflux - the thrashing you describe could actually be pain. Or, have you tried a cranial osteopath? The only time DS would sleep without drugs was after he had his sessions wit the CO (we only used the drugs for about 3 nights in conjunction with other sleep training, but it did really help).

Massive huge sympathies, bars of chocolate and hugs, it is utterly soul-destroying

cod

outtolunchagain · 16/10/2014 07:42

Hi George , I hope things area bit better , just wanted to mention that years ago we had similar problems after a flight . It turned out that the pressure in the cabin had caused ds2's ear drum to burst . I would get her ears checked you never know

In the meantime have lots of chocolate and a very unmumsnetty hug

naty1 · 16/10/2014 10:14

If she has allergies have you checked soya allergy?

TimeForAnotherNameChange · 16/10/2014 10:24

Go to the doctors and ask about a short term (3-4 days) course of low dose sedatives, or have a look at the online research into melatonin. You need to take action because its impacting on the health of all of you.

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