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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think it wasn't dds fault her toddler got hurt?

33 replies

HighwayDragon · 12/10/2014 10:00

We were at soft play yesterday, it was exceptionally busy (rainy day) dd and her friend go running into the big frame all excited, about 10 minutes later dd who is 4 emerges with a bawling toddler. This little lad was about 18 months old, 2 at the oldest. She bought him to me and said she had knocked him over by accident, his mum comes rushing over and asked what happened in there and dd says to her 'I ran into him because I didn't see him and he fell on his face' This woman then tells dd that she was very naughty for hurting her son and that she needs to be careful and not hurt other kids (dd started to cry) Well I'm afraid I was not happy and told this woman that it was not my dds fault she had let her baby in there and that she was responsible for what had happened, woman huffed off and I thanked dd for having the sense to bring him out to me and not leave him screaming in there.

Wibu? Dp thinks I shouldn't have said anything, but this woman had told dd off for something that was an accident, and wouldn't have happened if she had been supervising her toddler.

OP posts:
ClapHandsIfYouBelieveInFatties · 12/10/2014 10:02

YANBU I hope you told DD how good she was for bringing him out? Most would have stepped over him and walked off at her age!

She was sill to let a tiny child in the big frame alone.

Only1scoop · 12/10/2014 10:02

I think the fact that your dd came out and confessed what happened speaks volumes....bless her.

You are certainly doing something right Wink

hesterton · 12/10/2014 10:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WestEast · 12/10/2014 10:03

As someone who was also at a packed soft play centre myself yesterday I think your DD behaved very well indeed.

CundtBake · 12/10/2014 10:03

YANBU

She should have been supervising her small child at a busy soft play. Was there a separate area specifically for littler ones?

My DS is almost 3 and pretty tough but I'd still be following him around if he wanted to go on the big frame, especially at a busy time

scarletforya · 12/10/2014 10:04

Yanbu.

Her eighteen month old should not have been left alone in the main frame. She was negligent and wrong to call your Dd naughty when it was an accident.

thatstoast · 12/10/2014 10:04

I bet she was just upset that her son was hurt. If she has any sense she'll have realised after the fact that your daughter behaved very well. I'm certainly impressed that she brought him out and told you what happened.

SavoyCabbage · 12/10/2014 10:04

Yanbu. If I was the other mother I would have thanked her dd for being kind enough to help him out and for telling the truth. You did the right thing by saying something as your dd needed to know that she had done the right thing.

notagainffffffffs · 12/10/2014 10:05

Yanbu 2 is too small to be in play frame unsupervised!

Smileyaxolotl1 · 12/10/2014 10:06

Yanbu - he was too little to be unsupervised and your dd sounds lovely to bring him out and admit it was her who bumped him. I am sure most parents would have thanked her and not given it any more thought.

Original poster
HighwayDragon · 12/10/2014 10:07

Yes there was a seperate bit with a ball pit and some toys and the comfy sofas

OP posts:
NeedsAsockamnesty · 12/10/2014 10:07

Assuming your dd was in the age appropriate section YANBU

UltraNumb · 12/10/2014 10:07

nbu, there are 3 areas in our soft play 0-2, 3-5, 5+ and the kids are strictly kept to their own areas with warning that the children in the wrong place do so at their parents risk and must be supervised at all time.

your lady would have got short shrift if she'd done it there!

dashoflime · 12/10/2014 10:08

I am a slack mum who lets my 2 year old run about unsupervised. But I have the sense to know that accidents happen. I would have thanked your Dd for being responsible and taking him out of the frame

Original poster
HighwayDragon · 12/10/2014 10:09

I was very pleased with her for coming out with him, especially since she never normally cares about crying kids. I've just asked her if she remembers yesterday and why she bought the boy to me she said 'because he was very little and crying' then looked at me like this Hmm Grin

OP posts:
ILovePud · 12/10/2014 10:10

YANBU, you did the right thing to put your dds feelings above social niceties. She did nothing wrong and you've sent her a powerful message that her mum will support her and act with fairness in these circumstances.

moaningminnie2 · 12/10/2014 10:11

'I ran into him because I didn't see him and he fell on his face'

But it wasn't his age that got him knocked down was it, it was your DD not looking where she was going and this would have happened whether the other person had been 18m or 4 yrs old, So technically it was her 'fault', but this sort of accident happens all the time at softplay and it is ridiculous to apportion blame.You have to expect it if you take your child there.

pommedeterre · 12/10/2014 10:11

Aww your lovely dd. She deserves cuddles and treats. Toddlers mummy a twonk, you have to be 200% of your facts before telling someone else's child off. The cheek! Yanbu

temporarilyjerry · 12/10/2014 10:12

As a teacher of young children, it makes me cross when they are made to feel that they have been "naughty" when accidents happen. She didn't see him. She was running around in a soft play area. SWNBU.

I agree with you, OP.

This mother was negligent

Bouttimeforwine · 12/10/2014 10:13

Yanbu

ChippingInLatteLover · 12/10/2014 10:15

She did the right thing.
You did the right thing.

The woman did the wrong thing telling your DD off.
The woman didn't do anything wrong letting her child play in there 'unsupervised'

ILovePud · 12/10/2014 10:21

I think many soft play areas advise that the big frame is for children aged over three or four. If that is the case here and given that it was on a busy Sat then I think it is inappropriate to allow a child aged between 1 and 2, according to OP's estimate, to play in there unsupervised.

Nomama · 12/10/2014 10:23

What she said ^^

It's a no faulter. Kid bounced off another kid in soft play area. Not really much of a headline, is it?

Nomama · 12/10/2014 10:23

^^ was at Chipping's post Smile

Aherdofmims · 12/10/2014 10:27

Yanbu.

Who on earth leaves an 18 month old unsupervised? You have to stay really near them.

Dd was good to bring him out and you were right to take her part.

Woman was wrong in her approach all round.

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