To consider moving to Sydney and uproot my DH and two DC for two years...

[MrsDe]

Hi all, I've just been told that there is now a real opportunity for me to embark on a secondment in Sydney for two years starting January. Amazing opportunity and we're seriously considering it (currently live in London).

I'm chatting to HR about further details but to be honest they seem pretty clueless and I've never done anything like this before. I'm trying to be objective and work out whether it is something that is good for the family overall or whether I'm being totally unreasonable and selfish in thinking about it.

I have two children six and four and DH is a teacher so will not work initially but would like to eventually if he can. He says he's up for it and fully supports me but I do feel guilty uprooting him.

Am I mad to even consider this with a young family? My job is quite full on and so potentially long hours (which I do in the UK anyway). But what level of salary will this be achiveable on one salary alone?

We will rent out our current house which will cover our UK mortgage/letting fees etc and we're not big spenders or have any other debt and currently manage in the UK with private school fees etc so think we can do this on one salary but I could be just totally naive? Aware of the school fees for professionals on visas etc.

Gosh, sorry about the length of this post! I'm just not sure whether I'm being unreasonable in thinking this is a great opportunity - or am I being selfish and focussing on my career ahead of my family?

Dcs are 6 and 4.

I'd probably go for it if the money makes sense. I moved to North America for two years for my father's work when I was nine and have some great memorides, though it was a little tricky socially. Your children are young and your dh is keen. Go for it!

We already live in Australia but are about to move to Sydney from Melbourne for my dh's work. Housing in Sydney is more expensive from what we've seen and we've found that the cost of living in Australia is higher overall, but that's in part because we now need a car (never needed one in London). It works out for us, though, as we both earn more here. I'd want to make sure you got paid more here than in London to maintain the same lifestyle.

I'd also check on the schools situation. We have a 4 year old who could technically start school next January in New South Wales (late July birthday) but we're holding him back as in Victoria where we currently live he wasn't eligible to start until the following year and so he hasn't done a proper preschool year yet (each state has its own education system and school start age cut-off here...slightly bonkers). It's true a lot of people here hold their child back a year if they're going to be amongst the youngest in the year but it does depend on the child. Your younger child's eligibility to start school may be worth considering. It can be hard to find a preschool place - they're all doing the allocation now and
and have waiting lists.

Do it!
We moved to the UK as a family when I was mid teens and my brother was about your kids age. It was an amazing adventure. Hugely rewarding for us as a family. I'm so pleased my family did it.

You'll be eligible for reciprocal healthcare if you are British so don't need private health insurance just get ambulance cover as a minimum.

If the combination of visa you'll have and the State you're going to mean that you have to pay fees for state schools (it varies a lot) then you may well find that Private schools won't cost you that much more.
Bear in mind that in the public system you also have to pay out for all of their stationary, i.e. exercise books/folders/ pens/pencils/ crayons/ coloured pencils/workbooks, etc plus school trips
It adds up to several hundred dollars per child per year, whereas all of that is usually included in Private schools

Thanks again all. Will post later but just wanted to say thanks for all your thoughts.

Go, go, go!

I'm so jealous! As someone who lived abroad for a couple of years when I was five, I always hoped I'd be able to offer the same fantastic opportunity to my own children, but my my and my husband's careers have headed in the wrong direction to allow it.

Your husband might want to check out teacher exchanges. My sister met her australian husband when he was on an exchange to this country. She emigrated and then twelve years later they came back to the uk with their three kids on another year's swap.

Sorry; RTFT, Gubbins! I see someone's already suggested exchanging up-thread.

Your children are a good age to enjoy the best of Australia, though they may be a bit sad to come back to the UK after, but hopefully the excitement of seeing family will help with that!

I'd go...

No, do it! What an amazing opportunity for you and your family...

My sons were 9 and 4 when we went on assignment to Valencia. Not quite the same I know - it was a bigger upheaval for me than them. My oldest, now 22, can remember it and the two years went by quickly. We rented our house in the U K through an agency and that went well. It was a good experience but i must admit I didnt really enjoy it as much as I thought I should have. My husband was at work and still having to travel. The pressure to 'get on' with other people also on assisgnment was hard for me too. If you do go, I wish you lots of luck with it. I hope it works out well.

Re remembering things at their age, I moved to Australia when I was 5 and I still have very clear memories of my childhood in the UK as well as holidays to Europe when I was 3, 4 and 5, so there's no reason to believe your children won't remember their time in Aus.

Oh and you mentioned about holidays. In Australia public holidays don;t count as holiday leave so you get about 10 (maybe 11) days on top of your leave.

Ok, so it looks as though this could be "a good thing". I'm working out finances to see if we can cope on my salary alone for two years (will be in excess of 200kAUD).

Have factored in cost of state school, will look at shopping and rental, health insurance, tax etc. We'll take all our furniture with us I think.

My youngest will turn 5 before next July so hopefully he'll be able to get into school and of course we won't need wrap around care if my DH isn't working - which he doesn't plan to initially if we can cope financially but he wants to eventually to keep his CV uptodate.

Aware of rough areas wherever you go really - we currently live inner city London so don't think that will be a huge issue for us.

I'm the first one in my department to do this and can only really see that it's a positive. I've discussed my return to the london office but it's all early days yet. I'll ensure that I return with the same job title, salary and terms and conditions etc but can't see that they can guarantee that I'll be with the same clients doing the same work. I'm happy to take that risk. Obviously risk that DH can't get a job when we return - we've discussed that.

So, upshot is that I don't feel that guilty now. I'm very excited that I can offer this to my family after reading all the responses - thank you all so much.

I might PM some of you if that's ok? I've got a lot to get my head around and while I do have friends who are in Australia it would be great to get some first hand experiences.

*Gosh, just go.

If DCs were 16 and 14 then it's more complicated but 6 and 4? An ideal time for an adventure.

But make sure you have a sensible agency dealing with the renting of your UK house, not someone doing you a favour or renting to friends.*

This ^^^

Also, we hadn't thought about the exhange route for my DH - though not sure if it will work as we want to rent our house out. But certainly worth looking into that.

Yes, definitaly looking for a good renatal agency. I love my house and we recently had our kitchen redone. The thought of that not being looked after makes me want to weep!

Will your work be based in the CBD (city centre)?

There are lots of fantastic and quite distinct areas to consider in Sydney.

Tell us a little about what you like/dislike, your lifestyle etc and we may be able to give you some insight into areas that will appeal!

Yay for adventure!!

Hi Surfsup1, yes will be based in the centre (CBD - getting to know the lingo now!). Hmm, guess likes/dislikes focuses on my DC, so parks, not necessarily looking to be walking distance to the beach but relatively close by would be good. We're in a pretty urban setting at the moment but close to parks/canals etc so want to keep that.

As my hours will be long then don't want to be too far as not keen on long commutes and like to get home quickly in the evenings - happy to compromise on space for this.

Good schools have be a factor too - my DD is dyslexic so that needs to be taken into account when we're looking at schools.

We love art, running, cyclying, museums, eating out and my DH is a big sailor so getting him sailing again would be great. Where we live at the moment is quite arty/cosmopolitan (inner city london) and we love it where we are.

We lived in Germany and Cyprus for 4 years between them when my eldest was 7 and I had my youngest in Germany. It was a great experience for both my children, although my youngest can't really remember it, and my eldest talks about it all the time.

He has not suffered academically.

Do it!!!!

This will probably post twice.

We lived in Germany and Cyprus for 4 years between them when my eldest was 7 and I had my youngest in Germany. It was a great experience for both my children, although my youngest can't really remember it, and my eldest talks about it all the time.

He has not suffered academically.

Do it!!!!

This will probably post twice.

Sailing! He will adore Sydney. Wraparound care is called before and after school care here.

Oh it's nice to read a positive thread! We are considering a year/two years abroad with children age 6 and 3. Uprooting them is my main concern.

We did the reverse 12 months ago - came from Sydney to London (we are Australian, but come from Queensland not New South Wales). We mostly lived in inner west Sydney - Marrickville/Newtown/Dulwich Hill areas and absolutely loved it. Very walkable area - we had a car but only used it around once/week so a taxi would have sufficed - culturally diverse, politically liberal, lots of festivals/markets/art/music/family events/lovely shady parks. We also lived in the eastern suburbs - Bondi Junction/Queens Park - and whilst it was great, it has a very different feel to the inner west.

We're in SW London now, zone 3, and find that for the same quality, housing was more expensive in Sydney. Having said that, we survived comfortably on $120,000 AUD.
The first year of school is called Kindergarten, and children can start in January when they turn 5 by the following June, although you have the choice to start them the following year, and we found most people in the inner west delayed school entry.

I presume you will do your homework regarding wages and cost of living so I won't go into that. But as far as DCs are concerned, I would do it. There's too much noise about disrupting them and so on, but children are adaptable and it will be a wonderful experience for them living abroad and getting some exposure to other cultures (not that Australia is that much different). They'll love it and be grateful in the years to come.

Go go go! Your kids are young-they will adapt to whatever you do and wherever you are. We have friends who moved to Aus 2 yrs ago and they are loving the lifestyle-they're not coming back! (Kids were a bit older). If the finances add up (and it sounds like they do) and your DH is onside then it is a no brainer. It is so easy to keep in touch with family on the other side of the world now. Better to regret something you did than something you didn't do!!

From a slightly different point of view, as a major concern seems to be disrupting the kids, my parents moved me to a different country every year or two between the ages of 4 and 11. I remember loads and was not traumatised for life - I still remember the first day at each new school with a knot in my stomach but settled very quickly.

We had some amazing experiences and I loved my childhood. Having said that, I think it's knocked the wanderlust out of me as I'm not really fussed about moving anywhere ever again!