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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not let DS be weighed at school?

294 replies

QueenofKelsingra · 23/09/2014 18:50

DS is in reception. just had the letter home saying the whole year will be weighed and measured for the NHS.

I don't really know why but I don't want him to have this done. DS is a healthy height and weight (75 and 50 centiles respectively) so I'm not 'scared' I will get some snotty letter stating that he is over/under weight. I just don't like the idea of someone else taking his measurements and making comments/statements about him when I haven't asked for it.

DH thinks I'm making a mountain out of a molehill and that it's no big deal. For some reason I just don't like the idea.

So WIBU to refuse to have him weighed and measured? Anyone else do this and why??

OP posts:
MammaTJ · 23/09/2014 18:53

If you can't even articulate why you don't like the idea, maybe it is not such a bad idea after all.

I think you should allow it to be done, if only to redress the balance. You say your DS is a healthy weight. If everyone who had a child of a normal weight refused to allow them to be weighed, then the statistics would be very heavily weighted on the side of the heavily weighted!

MammaTJ · 23/09/2014 18:54

Sorry, meant to say, it is a) about your child and b)about gathering statistics about future health needs.

ArabellaTarantella · 23/09/2014 18:55

Well, at some point in his life doctor/hospital/medics will weigh and measure him. No biggie really.

Bulbasaur · 23/09/2014 18:55

As the school year goes on, you will have bigger problems than your child being weighed. You want your concerns to be taken seriously.

No one will take you seriously if you dig your feet in over something trivial.

Pick your battles.

accessorizequeen · 23/09/2014 18:56

They don't make comments to the child, and if there is a problem it's handled very diplomatically (a friend's child was/is overweight). And I can't think why it's a problem for you tbh.

LadyLuck10 · 23/09/2014 18:56

Yabu, I think that you're being precious. It's his measurements, which isn't a big secret. If you have nothing to worry about then I don't see the reason to not let him be weighed.

Coolas · 23/09/2014 18:56

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Enb76 · 23/09/2014 18:56

My child was weighed last year - she didn't even notice. It's not going to set them up for a life of eating disorders. I can see no sensible reason why a child shouldn't be weighed and I can see plenty of good reasons why a country should have data of this type.

Floggingmolly · 23/09/2014 18:56

Your dh is quite correct. You should listen to him...

PastorOfMuppets · 23/09/2014 18:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AdmitYouKnowImRight · 23/09/2014 18:58

I never have - only because I dont want to be a government statistic. I think it is invasive.

Bowlersarm · 23/09/2014 18:59

YABU.

I really don't understand why you actively wouldn't want this to be done.

NoodleOodle · 23/09/2014 19:02

I declined. Your child, your choice. If he doesn't need weighing, why bloomin do it. Are they missing lessons or break to do this?
yanbu

Original poster
QueenofKelsingra · 23/09/2014 19:02

arabella in that case it would be because he needed them done for a medical need.

pastor that's sort of how I feel, it's my job to keep an eye on his health.

admit yes its a bit of that too I think, he is too young to actively decided to be a 'statistic' and I think I feel a bit uncomfortable deciding to make him one!

am clearly in the minority though!!

OP posts:
PastorOfMuppets · 23/09/2014 19:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Delphiniumsblue · 23/09/2014 19:04

I can never understand this attitude. How can the government ever get to grips with the huge problem of child obesity if parents won't cooperate?
It is no big deal to the child, unless the parent makes it so. Think of the common good rather than thinking a little 5 yr old will find it 'evasive'. Make it matter of fact and the child will see it the same.

Delphiniumsblue · 23/09/2014 19:05

It is hardly a secret- everyone could make a pretty accurate estimate.

cathpip · 23/09/2014 19:06

My ds was weighed and measured last year and like your ds is on the 75th and 50th centiles. What amused me was the phone call from the school nurse who was inputting the data into the computer :). "Mrs pip, this is the school nurse, our records from the recent weight and height measurements show that your ds falls into the category of overweight, are you worried about his weight or diet". Umm no, I knew they would contact me as the two numbers don't match, my reply being after I had asked if she was the nurse who had taken the measurements (she wasn't) was "if you had been the nurse who took his measurements you would not be making this phone call, there is nothing wrong with his weight, end off" funnily enough the school laughed when I told them of my sons apparant weight problem (as did his dr) :)

Whippet81 · 23/09/2014 19:06

I'm going to go against the grain and say I don't think this should be done in schools - if health care professionals want to do it then I can go with that but not a school.

At the age they are it is likely that they wouldn't really get what was being done etc but when I was 11 we had a 'fat pinch' test. My PE teacher said in front of everyone 'oh Whipppet81 needs to do a few sit-ups' in a jokey manner. I am now 33 and it will go to my grave with me. I wasn't huge but well developed for my age and always felt inferior to the other girls.

Can you guarantee that no comments will be made?

I would never let a child of mine be physically measured in any way at school.

BarbarianMum · 23/09/2014 19:07

Your choice (and possibly your dh's?)

Personally, I think it's a good thing for the government to have accurate information of this nature on which to base their health spending priorities. They don't actually care what weight your child is. they're just looking for the trend.

HeySoulSister · 23/09/2014 19:07

He's at school now....he will be a 'statistic' one way or another right the way through til he leaves at 16/17!

Will you be awkward over SATS too?

Also, his dad has a say, and he thinks opposite to you. He can over ride you if he wanted to

PastorOfMuppets · 23/09/2014 19:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ExpiredUserName · 23/09/2014 19:10

YABU (but up to you obviously Smile ). It's the same as getting checked by the nit nurse isn't it? I think it's a good idea.

ILovePud · 23/09/2014 19:10

I don't think this is anything to worry about, but ultimately this is your child and you don't have to consent so you and your DH should make the decision together. Where I work we try to gather lots of personal data, most people consent to answer the questions but some don't, we don't question them on why but I think some people are just uncomfortable with this kind of thing and feel it's a bit big brother/nanny state.

Haferflocke · 23/09/2014 19:14

I did not give my consent either. No obesity here either, rather the opposite.

If I have concerns about my dc's weight, I see my doctor. End of.

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