to refuse to have breakfast at 5am?

[Kveta]

DC have been up since before 5, as per usual. They are ratty, I am ratty, DH is getting his second lie in of the weekend because I couldn't get back to sleep.

Anyway, they are pestering me for breakfast, and I am refusing, on the basis that 7am is as early as I can cope with anything handling food at the weekend. They have had a mug of milk each already btw.

DS (4) thinks I am being deeply unreasonable, and DD (2) agrees with anything he says anyway.

Since they have been unreasonable and comprehensively ignored the gro clock, and woken us all up anyway, am I being unreasonable to not make porridge before 7 a.m.?

Mine are a bit older at 6,5 and 3 but they know they aren't supposed to wake us up before 7am. They're allowed downstairs and can get themselves fruit before then.

If they wake us up to ask for breakfast they get told no until after 7am.

I feel for your 5am start. We are usually about 6am here (including weekends) and it's torture.

Personally, I would give them something like a banana to stave off the hunger pangs until a more reasonable hour.

Fruit is your friend here. I just hand mine an apple and banana, bobs your uncle.

well they have ignored breakfast now, and are playing with playdough instead. The fruit bowl is there if they get peckish in 20 minutes time though.

re: rewarding for staying in bed, that's how we have got to 5am starts... massive improvement on 4 a.m., it just seems to be their rising time though, not much we can do about it. thank god for netflix.

oh, and DD is still bfed, so shouldn't be hungry after a feed at 5 a.m. really! (she doesn't have a feed every morning, and never eats much breakfast regardless of whether she has a feed or not, before anyone asks!)

I would feed them tbh

Mine get up anywhere between 5-7am and generally first thing they do is eat

Mine is 4 and today was awake at just before 6am. He gets warm milk in a cup and a couple of rich tea biscuits and his multivitamin to keep him going till breakfast time and while I drink my coffee.

He's had the milk with something - used to be dry Cheerios or similar since he was about 18 months old and was waking at 5am. I refuse to do breakfast before 7.30 to 8am.

As to staying in his bedroom and not waking us up...I have to admit I gave up when he was 3ish because he would wake up tantruming and literally scream the house down up we managed to calm him down by which time I was up anyway.

Once I'm awake I can't get back to sleep and trying gives me a nasty headache.

Nope. You're right. No breakfast at 5am. Or they will wake everyday at 5 for food. 7am is much more reasonable. But if they're genuinely hungry at 5, waiting 2 hours is a bit mean.

So I would make breakfast at 6am for a week or two. Then move to 6.30am (regardless of what time they get up!), eventually moving it to 7am.

This is what I did with my two. It worked well.

Next week put a comic, sports bottle of milk, and some breakfast biscuits next to their beds for when they wake up, and tell them they are not allowed out of their rooms until 700, except to go very quietly to the loo. Tell them if they wake you up with noise and banging about, there will be Big Trouble.

PS They will need one of those pop up alarm clocks with a bunny's face that wakes up, and at 5 they may actually look at it and then go back to sleep (I think your two missed their last sleep cycle).

If you regularly give food at this unholy hour their little bodies will get used to it and you'll have even less chance of breaking this get up time.... Sympathies, DC did this too. We had breakfast bips ( radio four beeps for the 7 am news) and that was when they could eat (milk before then). Also it was quiet time before then, stories/ cuddles nothing very active..... Other things that helped, loads of exercise in the day, 7.30 bedtime (even when little and everyone else seemed to do 7), and repeated boring reinforcing of the grow -clock role from age 4 on. Youngest won't get it, but your eldest really should be able to follow the grow -clock by now. They had to stay in bed until it was time (big reward if they managed a whole week, strictly enforced- I remember tears and tantrums). Sounds harsh but by this point I knew they knew and the early rising was having a horrible effect on the whole family.
DC are now 4 and 7 and took themselves downstairs at 7 and watched TV quietly.... Like everything out does pass, hang on in there..

Ok. I think i might be too soft.

Tbh during the week I need to be up for 6 for work. So feeding kids early isn't an issue really

DS is 2 and has a gro clock, he knows not to get up until the sun appears at 7am.

I used to get an extra hour of peace by sitting ds on the end of my bed watching the cbeebies test card thing. He'd sit there quiet as a mouse, slurping occasionally on his bottle, waiting for cbeebies to start. At 6 he was allowed to wake mummy for breakfast. I also kept a fruit bowl in my bedroom that he could help himself from.
He was almost 5 before he stopped! He still gets up at 5 every day but he's old enough now to amuse himself until a more reasonable time.

You are not being unreasonable at all. I remember the 5am wake ups, it's grim. It will pass, hang in there

Hungry or not, YANBU.

It won't harm them to wait, and if you do feed them their bodies will start waking and expecting food earlier. 7am is a perfectly reasonable time to start eating.

I read somewhere recently that our bodies are designed to have a long break from food (14 hours or so) overnight, because it allows us to carry out other important processes like healing. It was more complicated than that, but made total sense.

YANBU, if you feed them at 5, they'll just be hungry again by 9 or 10. Not so good for them if they are in class or nursery at half 9 with rumbly tums.

Bugger that. Me and my brother used to think it was a fine lark to get up at 3 am and play in our room. Didn't mean that our mother was therefore obligated to feed us just because we were awake.

They won't starve!

Oh my god feed your babies! Have you never woken up extra hungry for no reason? Do you not feel hungry when you wake up on a morning?

My mother was like this and I remember not being able to get a drink in the middle of the night or silly things like this but as a child I didn't really like her. I much perfered staying with my nana who was nice (non controlling)

Yanbu! That's the middle of the night! Stick to your guns. I doubt I'd even speak to them at that time let alone feed them.

I used to leave a cereal bar on my DS's bedside cabinet every night for this very reason. He'd wake up any time from 4.30, and I was just too knackered to get up and sort breakfast at that time. So he'd eat his cereal bar, drink his bottle of water and be quite content to mess about in his room till 6.30.

What time do you feed them dinner in evening? I would be tempted to move to an hour later

Mealtimes in our house tend to be

Breakfast between 5 and 7
Dinner between 11 and 11.30
Tea 4.30

Snack of fruit or toast mid morning and mid afternoon

That is dc aged 1, 5 and 6

Wow with dinner at 4.30pm no wonder they wake at 5am

Here it's more:

7.45am breakfast (9-10am at weekends)
1pm lunch (1-3pm weekends)
7pm dinner (7-9 pm weekends)

They are 3 and 4. Usually sleep 8pm-7.30am weekdays ( as school), 9/10pm-9/10am weekends.

There is no way on earth dd 17 months would be awake past 7pm

She has her tea at 4.30, milk at 6 and is always in bed by 7pm

I suppose it depends on what time you need to be up and out in the mornings

On a work day I sometimes leave the house at 6.50, with my dd. So she needs to be up by 6. So she can't be going to bed at like 8pm