Over this Twitter message?

[Meh84]

It was my Nan's funeral yesterday, it was a lovely service and we went all out at the wake to celebrate her life, lots of people there, music, good food etc.

My dad and his brothers organised a balloon release, everyone wrote a message and attached it, and then we let them of together. It was such a beautiful sight and very emotional.

So last night I wrote on Twitter about said release and how Nan would've loved the music and celebrations.

I woke this morning to someone telling me off for littering and about how much wildlife would suffer because of it.

I got angry and wrote a response back, asking him politely to fuck off.

Were we being inreasonable to do this balloon release? I was thinking more of my poor nan and not any wildlife!

It's still very raw this morning, and it seems he targets anyone who writes balloon release in their tweets and gives them a lecture with no regards as to what the realease meant to the people who have done it.

Does he tweet from a phone?

Tell him about the environmental impacts of manufacturing mobile phones including radioactive materials, lithium batteries and gold. Then tell him to fuck off.

The problem with posting this on AIBU is that you are going to get many more negative posts than you did on Twitter. People like to jump on the bandwagon and look superior. It's a mistake to post on AIBU when feeling vulnerable, as I learned recently. You might want to hide the thread.

it is a crime, its littering

Well he didn't accomplish much by telling her after the event did he?

Other than upsetting her, nice guy

I think maybe he was just trying to get a point over but at the wrong time :-( .

Sorry for your loss.

But he is right both about harming wildlife and Helium.

Helium is not a renewable resource, and is needed for medical use. It should be banned in balloons all together.

fox17online.com/2014/02/11/helium-shortage-goes-way-beyond-birthday-balloons/

www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24903034

I dont allow my children helium balloons.

Who wants to hear that after a funeral though? Seriously?

"Well he didn't accomplish much by telling her after the event did he?"

But, surely her followers could see his comments, so maybe he managed to educate somebody?

Well he didn't accomplish much by telling her after the event did he?

Well, she won't be tempted to do it again, and IF someone talks about doing it, maybe she'll say something to stop them.

that would salvage something from this mistake.

I bet this wasn't 'something Nan would have wanted' actually.

I bet this wasn't 'something Nan would have wanted' actually

Please don't tell me what my Nan would/would not have wanted. How do you know that she didn't request it before she passed away?? Not everyone thinks about the repercussions of events that this, especially at times like these.

It was really mean of this person to point this out at such a difficult time for you. I'm not keen on those chinese lantern things. But can't see the harm in a few balloons.

So I think I'm going to delete this now. Getting upset, and I've wasted an entire morning!

Also, well done to the tweeter who went over and called us all 'idiots'. I'll be sure to pass that onto my family xx

Sorry for your loss but I wonder if, seeing as you describe your Nan as a remarkable woman, there wouldn't have been something less damaging you could have done? I care passionately about protecting wildlife and educating people in the damage that littering does and if I thought for one minute that someone would do such a thing in my name I'd spin on my funereal axis for the rest of eternity. What's wrong with a good old fashioned charitable donation? It's not over in seconds and it harms nobody.

I think this man is going about things the wrong way. There is little point attacking people who have already released the balloons, and by being so aggressive towards people in Meh's sad position, who have lost loved ones, he is likely to be alienating people towards his campaign.

Perhaps if Meh had seen a campaign against the balloons before making the decision to honour her grandmother this way, with information about the damage they can do AND suggestions of environmentally responsible alternative ways she could have honoured her, she might have made a different choice.

But as this is often done to honour people's lost loved ones, there is a big likelihood that he will be attacking grieving people, and that really sticks in my craw. Of course the environment, and the safety of animals is very important, but there have to be better ways to promote these ideals than attacking people who are mourning loved ones - maybe children.

It's unfair and unnecessary for people to try and make the OP feel worse at this time by suggesting this isn't what her Nan would have wanted. The balloon release has already been done and now she knows the environmental issues the OP probably wouldn't participate in another one so unless you expect her to go out and collect all the balloons there is nothing more she can do so there is no point making her feel bad about it.

I agree SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius

I agree, Topaz. Saying it isn't what her Nan would have wanted is unacceptable, and people should feel ashamed of adding to her pain right now.

Cross posted!

Agree with the majority on the thread.

OP, I'm very sorry for your loss. I think the message to you was very ill timed and insensitive but the sentiment valid.

He was right about the helium and release.

I think his method of delivery undermined his message. I care about the environment and agree balloon releases are bad for it but I still think he's a twat for targeting mourners. He could campaign generally for balloon releases to be banned without attacking individuals.

I have read the thread thank you. I still stand by what I said. You post on the internet, then you need to expect that not everyone will agree with you. You posted a 'look at us" twitter message about a funeral, but then got upset when everyone didn't agree with your environmentally damaging method of mourning. Now you've started a thread on an internet forum about the same issue. Did you ever consider just grieving privately?

some people have nothing better to do OP, just ignore them, I had the Josie Cunningham fan club sending me tweets the other week! now that is sad

He was right in that helium balloons are an environmental nightmare, killing wildlife and using up a rapidly-dwindling non-renewable resource (helium) which is needed for medical uses. I won't buy them or endorse their use.

But his timing was terrible. You are unlikely to listen to him say this straight after a funeral.

What kind of things could we do instead at occasions like this, instead of balloons? There must be something which doesn't damage the environment? I know I don't want my memory to be honoured by a lot of choking small animals and a closed hospital lab.

At my friend funeral, we were all given paper and pens to write little messages that were placed on top of the coffin. The idea was that he would take with him all our love and memories of times shared.

We handed out forget me not seeds at my nan's funeral for people to plant in their gardens in memory of her.