to ask (if i may) how you cope with overly competitive people?

[ithoughtofitfirst]

I've never really had this problem before... or possibly just been oblivious to it when it has happened. Basically a family member doing constant one-upmanship with me. Maybe i'm imagining it? But i don't think i am... it's driving me nuts. Not because i want to be better just because it's really getting on my tits. I feel like i can't do anything without hearing a week later that they've done the same thing but better/bigger/more expensive/faster (daft punk anyone?) ... you get the idea.

Does anyone else have this? What do you do to not give a shit?!

I just.... don't give a shit, I ignore, or say "Oh well done" and gradually stop telling them anything at all to do with my life. Life is too short to have to deal with all that sort of crap....

I know a couple of gobshites who do this. Sometimes I play with them for a bit but usually I just nod and smile.

Just don't bother, it's probably not only you who they're doing it to.
Say something like 'oh glad to have inspired you' with a smile and walk away.

Same as JustAShopGirl

I just don't compete, it's a waste of energy.

Or.......... you do what my complete wind up merchant dad does, invent wild fantasies of what what you're doing in life. According to him, he is currently doing out his non existent basement as a nightclub and is installing a hot tub and sauna in dining room.

it's the little things that keep him going

Can you give an example?

How do I cope with them? Avoid/Quietly drop/Ignore.

Ignore.

I don't . One of the mums of DS3's friend was like this . We used to call her 'two shits ' because if you'd had one ...... . We used to get constantly asked crap like 'what reading level is your DS on , mine is on ... Something fantastic '. 'We read the Bible before dinner , what do you read ? '. Constant constant comparisons , and not only with us , but every other family she came into contact with . In the end it became a running joke with the rest of us , to come up with the most outlandish replies , just to see what she would top it with . And the bullshit ! 'My DH is in management ' - no he wasn't , he drove a bread lorry . Which there is absolutely nothing wrong with in any way shape or form , and nor is it less important a job , but don't boast of something that is patently bollocks , and easily found out when he's parking the lorry in front of your house every night .

Either don't engage or come up with something utterly outlandish that we 'did this weekend'.

'My DH is in management ' - no he wasn't , he drove a bread lorry.

Never underestimate how much management a loaf of bread requires.

Generally speaking, these are the people who, if you have a cold, they have the flu; if you have a sore throat, they have tonsilitis if you have a headache, they have a fucking brain tumour or something How to deal with them?? I generally find that (passive aggressively) pointing out that you've noticed what they're doing works quite well...

I just shrug and vaguely unimpressed. I honestly don't care.

Just let themselves work themselves into nlknots. You live your life and enjoy it for you. Their ulcer not yours! Or respond. With 'really? I know, it's tough having to compromise in these tough financial times isn't it' childish. But they might get the hint that they're being a materialistic ass.

Raptor I love your dad.

Agree with wild embellishments. 'Oh you had your sunday dinner at that michelin starred restaurant? Thats cute. I dont want to boast but a chef I couldn't possibly name - but it rhymes is beston muminthall is a close family friend so I find sunday roasts a tad.... provincial'

I tend to glaze over and act as though something else has caught my attention while they are boasting - once they realise I'm not listening it really knocks the wind out of their sales.

I'm a complete bitch, I know, but it's the only way I can cope with it!

sails

Nod, 'that's nice' and move on. I lived with one of these last year. Nightmare, all you can do is seem really bored and/or laugh in their faces.

Or, if I can get away with it, I may patronise them.

Them: "my reception aged DD read as sign out the other day and asked me what pedestrianised means"

Me: "oh don't worry, her comprehension will come when she's had a bit more practice with reading"

Really petty example but one week i made a sponge with my boy cause it was raining and we were bored/wanted cake. I don't even know how they found out whhat we'd been up to but the following week i get a whatsapp picture of a MASSIVE (we're talking 12 egg) sponge with whipped cream and fresh raspberries lovingly arranged and dusted with icing sugar with... this is the annoying bit .... "a bit different to yours, no?" With a winky face.

I am a runner... i take breaks every now and again but whenver i get back into it they hire a personal trainer and don't stop updating me with how much weight they've lost.

Eurgh. Just shit like that. All the time.

I just don't give a shit.

I don't have to do anything, it's just obvious.

Who's telling you what she's doing? Just say oh, is she? That's nice.

Or start making out you are doing wildly outrageous things, see how far she'll go.

photo shop your living room walls neon orange. Invest in a bald cap. The options are limitless...

Loving these replies btw

xpost. ok. that would piss me off. better than yours, no?

just for the infuriating use of the word 'no', at the end of the sentence, you should reply

Oh my, yes it is. You have put me to shame. You win my life. Congratulations. you've certainly put the effort in. you deserve it.

I don't know anyone who is competitive as such, but pretentious yes! Is it more or less annoying than people who do the constant martyr: 'Oh, how grand, it must be nice to be so rich and successful..' just because you went out for a pizza instead of buying it from the supermarket.