To move into another bedroom due to DH snoring?

[Pollywallywinkles]

I'm fed up with having my sleep disturbed by DH snoring. I've gone to bed well before him for a number of years so I am asleep before he comes to bed. However, I am still frequently woken during the night because of his snoring. Once I'm awake, I find it difficult to get back to sleep and can be awake for more than a couple of hours despite getting up and moving rooms. I work full time and need my sleep.

Things are slightly compounded by peri menopause and night sweats which may or may not disturb me (some nights are worse than others).

DH says that there is nothing he can do about his snoring and has made no moves to seek medical advice. He knows he will be told to stop smoking and cut down on drinking.

I have moved to another bedroom which has really upset DH who thinks I am being unreasonable. Am I?

AutumnDragon - why did you need your husband's permission to sleep elsewhere?

OP - just go in another room. Sleep deprivation could cause all sorts of accidents and you won't want that.

ItsFab - Sorry that was just badly worded. He wasn't happy with the idea, we would both prefer to sleep in the same bed, but he then started to understand just how bad it was getting. I certainly didn't need permission.

Hubbie and I have separate beds as he snores and we are both sprawlers :)

YANBU. Why should you be the only one who gets inconvenienced? Perhaps sticking to your guns will finally motivate him to go to the doctor.

YANBU, but you might still be able to hear him from the other room (happens in our house).

It's grim, I sympathise. And also how did they evolve to snore? In the wild a bear would hear them and come over for snack time pronto?

Also to the ear plug people- you can't wear them if you need to hear young DCs.

Feel your pain. I am going to start with 3 or 4 nights a week in the spare room. See if I feel any fresher. I have gotten into the habit of going back to bed when everyone has left in the mornings. I think part of my peri menopause is light sleeping.... can't possibly be my DH snoring. Can it?

YANBU. I've moved into the spare room too and I love it! Not only is it snore-free, but I no longer have to put up with being coughed on, breathed on, elbowed and squashed. It's great!

I wish I had a bedroom to move to, I usually end up on the sofa. Dh snores so loudly that you can here him all over the house, I have been known to go and sleep in a chair in the garage!

YANBU. If you don't get enough sleep your health will start to suffer. I wear ear plugs but would sleep in the spare room if that didn't work. Many of my friends also wear ear plugs or sleep in the spare room sometimes. I think that it is very common, particularly for couples over the age of 40.

nope YANBU. I regularly sleep on the sofa due to dh's snoring would love my own room

Peppersaunt. These are fab

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B0013HGG0C?pc_redir=1410558925&robot_redir=1

Expensive but worth it.

OP YABU. Make him move.

Yanbu. This is why I am considering moving to a whole new post code, where we can afford a 4 bedroom house.

We had loads of rows about snoring - but I bought him ( yes I know he should have taken responsibility) the nytol snore spray - it's not perfect - but it is a lot quieter and it does wear off a bit by 5-6 ish but I'm getting a lot more sleep and he is actually getting better sleep as his snores or me prodding him is not disturbing his sleep - we're now on our 2nd bottle it's £10 a pop though

YANBU. My parents were sleeping in seperate rooms due to my father's snoring. Now he has a sleep apnea machine which feeds him a constant stream of O2 and it has stopped completely.

my DH could be heard from any room in the house and I had to sleep elsewhere or turn the tv on so rather then loud snores there was a constant drone. I would wake several times a night and if he went to bed 1st I couldnt sleep and would wake up tired with a headache.
He has also been diagnosed with sleep apnoea and has a CPAP machine now, there is a noise like a strong wind blowing but he has stopped snoring so although it not perfect but much better.

Yanbu, I have my own room one of the reasons was for dh's snoring.

it started as he always went up first to watch tv but when I needed to sleep he didn't like that he would need to switch the tv off as I need quiet and dark, this caused endless squabbles when he refused.

Then came the friggin' snoring (when he does sleep).

Also he suffers from insomnia, often waking up at anywhere between 1 and 5 am and not being able to get to back to sleep.
Does he then get out of bed and go downstairs????
No he bloody well doesn't...... he fidgets constantly, plays games on his phone/laptop clatters around for various chargers/gadgets, is up and down for the bloody loo (en-suite) gets to about 5.30am and decides to take a shower (again en-suite) opening and closing drawers looking for clothes .....it goes on with no bloody consideration for me.

He threw a strop when I refused to come back to the bedroom and took it personally. I went over and over the exact reasons why.
He finally realised what a twunt he was being when I agreed to come back in for a night but told him if he woke me up (even once) I wouldn't be responsible for my actions.

He struggled so hard to keep quiet the penny actually dropped.... yes he is a noisy fucker!!!!

On holiday he actually asked if we could sleep separately, so he wouldn't disturb me going out for golf at the crack of dawn..... as I was also on holiday and needed a lie in!!!

Its has saved my sanity tbh and dh didn't realise how much sleep I was losing.
You need to stick to your guns!

It sounds like some of you have much noisier snorers.

I've never tried ear plugs, but don't think I will find them comfortable as I can't wear any sort of bud earphones without getting earache. Would I be able to hear the alarm clock going off?

Record him on your phone and play it whilst he tried to sleep? Get a sound decibel app and record the volume. Then see how fair he thinks it is? The nose strips, throat spray and lozenges all used here for our resident bear and they work. The only consolation from me, I snored like a bear from the minute I was pregnant until dd2 was born. Like the loudest comedy snore you could imagine. I'm quite pleased with that.

Before DH and I moved house and I had a spare room to go to I tried ear plugs. I didn't really find they worked for me, I could still hear him, they just muffled the noise, and I could also hear my own breathing and heartbeat really loudly which I didn't like! There are loads of different types though and I've heard it recommended to order a variety pack and try out the different kinds - wax, foam etc.

I am an ex snorer (more about that later) but I was mortified if I disturbed anyone. I knew I couldn't help it but I was very embarrassed. I eventually had surgery in April to clear my sinuses (polyps plus plus) and to correct a deviated nasal septum. Thing is, until you sleep well (the results have been amazing) you don't realise how awful things were before. I had sleep apnoea because of the blockages and always felt exhausted due to disturbed sleep. I think the idea if recording him is a good one and making him away that his snoring may be attributed to something more than smoking and drinking.

My husband is another one who won't get his snoring sorted. We have separate bedrooms and it works quite well. Jump in for a cuddle then go I to another room. For sleep.

My Dh snored so badly I didn't get any sleep. One night I realised he had stopped breathing and nudged him. He gasped for breath. It scared me so I forced him To the doctor and it turned out he was stopping breathing 24 times every two minutes. It increases the risk of heart attack too. He was so tired in the day I thought he had depression-if he wasn't at work he was in bed.
The doctor found he had sleep apnoea and with the help of the specialist he now sleeps much better with a cpap machine. It's bliss! No noise!
And it may have saved his life.
Force your Dh to the doctors - it's so important to get this checked out.

Don't assume that 'getting the snoring sorted' would help you. My DH has a CPAP machine, and obviously it's good for him and he has to have it. I, on the other hand, haven't had a decent night's sleep at home since he got it 7 years ago because it's noisier than the snoring (but in a slightly different way). :(

Recording him snoring or having a cuddle and then going to another room won't work as I go to bed a good 2 hours before he does.

After a sulk from him last night, he actually went to the pharmacy today and discussed stopping smoking so I guess that is a step in the right direction.