Breastfeeding prison!

[CaJaGi]

I'm a first time Mum of a 3week old DS and I'm EBF. I was really open with feeding techniques but BF just seems to be clicking and working really well so I feel I should keep going with EBF. So while technically things are going great, he's putting on weight etc, emotionally I am finding it really draining and feeling guilty for not 'enjoying' our feeds. It just leaves me feeling a little like I'm in a boobie prison - I can't move or do anything during a feed (which lasts up to an hour) and by the time I've fed and winded DS there's only an hour to go before he wants another feed so I can't fit in much. I have expressed and he will take a bottle however he wont actually settle for anybody but me and gets himself wound up which makes me feel guilty for not giving him his feed from the breast. Anyone else out there feel the pressure of EBF? Any advice?

OneLittle that's a bit unnecessary. One of the OP's options is to give bottles of EBM or formula. Both may help her. And I'd fb doesn't work for you ff a six month old isn't particularly hard so it will be ok either way.

*if bf

It is a big adjustment so I feel where you are coming from.

I will say that when my son was older I found it was quiet liberating in some ways. I never had to worry about supplying a bottle so we could go pretty much anywhere and I could whip a boob out, with a cover obviously. It was nice not to have to lug a lot of stuff around.

I can't say that I 'enjoyed' breast feeding. I found it useful and practical and I was grateful that I was able to do it easily. I never felt like it was a bonding magical experience thing however, personally I think bonding is all in the mind.

I wish you all the best whatever you decide to do.

Keep going!
The gaps between feeds will get longer
You will be more relaxes as you feed the longer you do it
You will begin to appreciate day time TV
You can doze guilt free

You're doing a fabulous job. Give yourself an enormous pat on the back and keep going, I promise it gets easier.

I'm enjoying bf prison!! But then I've got netflix and Hulu and my sister satellite app with american tv on it to keep me company...

Get thee a subscription to netflix OP and enjoy, it won't be long before you're complaining that you don't have time to sit down!!

I currently have an awfully poor day-time sleeper, so six months on that 'prison' of being stuck bfing for longish periods has become a bit of an escape: while DC is feeding at least he is not Awake-DemandingAttention-Won'tSleep-NeedPlay-Don'tLookAwayFromMeWhileI'mBeingCute-NowNowNow-NoAbsolutelyWon'tSleep-MEMEMELookAtME! As other mums have said, Netflix is a lifesaver. Goodluck OP!

I remember that prison

I remember things being less prison like when he got to about 6 weeks. Stick with it and things will get soooooo much better

DS is now 5.5 months and it only takes him 5 minutes to have a feed - it's so quick, simple and convenient.

Mine has never taken a bottle so ay least you have that to your advantage - like another poster said, leave baby with DH and take yourself off somewhere nice.

Congratulations on your baby

Let the baby cry until you have a cuppa, your phone, tv on, you've pee'd and have the remote. In time doing all if that will be possible whilst breastfeeding at same time... (I once ate whole curry and non alc lager and pud whilst b'feeding)

Yep, it's a prison at firsts & bloody hard. Give it a try for bit longer. Xxx

As soon as I felt up to it I started going out for lots of walks. The change of scene was good for me and then the gaps between feeds got a bit longer and I often got a bit of time with the baby as asleep in the pram and I could have a quick cuppa.

It does get better by 8 wks I was flying. Feeds got quicker and easier became much more convenient. Honestly enjoy your feed times. Get a book or box set and plonk yourself on the sofa. Let yourself have some me time while feeding. Dh brought me some great box set DVDs. This first bit is the hardest. Kelly mom is great for advice.

littlebearpad I'm referring to this You all seem to have a very warped view of ff - I too can comfort my baby at any time as he doesn't need a bf (or suckle) to be comforted as obv not what he was use too. And really putting a tub of formula in you change bag isn't that big a deal (plenty of places will give you boiling/boiled water), esp in a city whe're you can pick up pre made so easily.

Besides the OP says the baby doesn't settle if someone else feed him. I'm not sure how a bottle would help. It's just those very tricky first few weeks where nothing but mummy cuddles would do. Even if ff, the baby seems will only settle for mummy's bottle.

I'm sure you know they will grow out of it and be more independent. It's just not going to be overnight.

kindle!

feeds will get shorter as your baby grows bigger and stronger.

If you can find some nice people to spend time with, long boring feeds can turn into a lovely chat with people bringing you cups of tea. Have you got anyone who might be up for a chat and be understanding about bfing? Your local LLL or breastfeeding group would be a good place to start.

3 weeks?! Come back in 3 months!

Wannabe there's no way your baby is that old already!

I'm a natural term bfer and definitely miss my stuck on the sofa days. DH used to make me a payee of sandwiches when he made his lunch and we stayed on the sofa (and I stayed on MN) all day.

I'm 3 weeks in to booby prison. If this might be half way through the sentence that's not so bad. If you can find comfortable positions that don't require so much active holding, I think that helps. I'm lying on the sofa with baby next to me (on a muslin to catch drips) watching telly, feeding and playing on phone.

He's going to get faster feeding wise and more efficient. Just bare with him for the next month or so.

Can you get a good book in the meantime or watch a film while he feeds.

A friend of mine gave up ebf and mix fed as she simply could not sit on the sofa for 6 hours a day (her words!).If you're not into mn, box sets etc it must be deadly boring! Don't feel pressure or guilt if you need to get out once in a while, even if your baby's left a bit unsettled after a bottle, no harm will come and if you need time away then you need it. You've bloody well earned it!

With my first i found it hard to relax into the endkess hours on the sofa easily, always felt I should be doing something else more productive, and that I was doing something wrong. But I stuck it out, bf until he was nearly three. With my second boy I totally loved being in bf prison! By then I had a smartphone, a kindle and stocked up on box sets, let the housework to go hang, and basically locked myself in and threw away the key whenever possible! 'twas fab. I recovered far more quickly from the birth second time round as well, just by spending so much time resting, bf with my feet up. I miss it now!

Well done OP for getting this far. Great advice to try and go with it. It is frustrating at times but it's also over far too soon. For me the benefits later on, much easier out and about, no night time bottles etc far outweighed the initial difficulties. I FF my first and EBF my second. The biggest factor that helped me was learning to feed laying down on the bed, once I could do that I loved having an excuse to laze about in bed

I shut myself away in my bedroom with my Ally McBeal box set

Side-on feeding lying down is the only way to go!

It's probably all been said but....

Find a good series to watch, learn to feed in sling, learn to feed lying down (whilst sleeping),always have a stock pile of cakes/chocolate, get mummy mates around and chill out and watch films together.

The intensity doesn't last. It will come and grow with growth spurts and developmental leaps. They pass.

I always tried to remind myself that these phase is soooooo short and I'll never get it back so sit down and enjoy the cuddles and being completely lazy.