to be annoyed over lie in

[morerogermore]

My Dh sometimes says he will look after DD in the mornings so I can have a lie in, but doesn't put in the effort to make it work. DD gets bored within minutes and asks for me. He doesn't really play with her, often on his laptop, and waits too late before taking her out (and then forgets coat, drink, etc).

He's not a stupid man but it's like he can't be bothered to put the effort in to make things work. He would need to properly turn his attention 100% to her to make it good, but I think he thinks she will just tick along like other things in the house. He won't tempt her to do things or make it sound good, so she just asks for me instead. I do explain to him and he sees me do it, but it's like he just can't be bothered in the morning. But I think it's unrealistic for a two year old to play on their own for a couple of hours while you're on laptop/radio/doing chores. Needless to say I get her dressed, do hair, teeth, breakfast etc. on these days.

AIBU?

clabsy I'm also poorly sick and my "lie-in" has been similarly thwarted by DCs asking me for stuff and, to top it off, DH failing to listen to them tell him what they wanted for breakfast, making them what he wanted, then me having to make them what they actually wanted after they failed to eat his (burnt) offerings.

I've also now tidied up, wiped and hoovered the kitchen, loaded and put on the dishwasher, and opened the mail.

He has finally taken DC1 out, but I've been left to grapple with a very full-of-beans DC2 for an hour or so. When all I want to do is wallow in my sick bed and sleeeeeep.

Oh, and YANBU OP!

YABU to think your DH should be up and out of the house before 9. We have 3 DDs now in their 20's so grown up. However when they were small DH and I did take turns at weekends and we never took them out before 9 unless we were going somewhere special. Saturday's were chill out days.

Definitely detach. Or you'll drive yourself stir crazy after you've had dc2 and dh and dd turn up at the hospital to visit with her having barely brushed hair, mismatching or too large/small clothes.

Some of the outfits dd1 particularly turned up in after I had dts were hilarious. Dh had an innate ability to lay his hands on the clothes at the bottom of her drawers. Even after I had hung outfits on hangers so all he had to do was get pants and socks. I just had to bite my tongue and be grateful he was able to be at home most of the time with her and ds1 when I had nearly 2 weeks in hospital. As for her hair... The children were clean and brushed. It's all I can say.

Relax!

I don't think the Yabu people understand that he doesn't have to go out, provided op isn't being disturbed by them being downstairs BUT DH doesn't put the effort in and therefore to get an undisturbed he should leave the tiny house to op.

Hm no I can imagine that Minisok. But how can a man who has several degrees etc. etc. etc? Also he always manages to get himself dressed ok. If he was wearing his tshirt backwards and tights without a skirt I would feel more sympathetic.

I think YANBU to expect an undisturbed lie in but YABU to insist that your DH has to be up and dressed and out of the house before 9 on a Saturday. Great that that works for you but clearly that isn't his kind of thing to do.

My DH gets up with our DS at the weekend and basically they snuggle up on the sofa watching DVDs until 9 when I come downstairs. He started doing this with him around 2 and it didn't take DS long to learn that that's what he does if it's DH up with him. You need to detach yourself and not go and intervene or help - if she watches too much TV it's once a week but your DH isn't going to find something that works for him if you step in and help or you tell him what to do.

DH And I share lie ins. I don't remember ever taking the children out really early in the morning.

Neither me nor DH are morning folk so we don't tend to 'do' much either. We might read books, watch TV, maybe crack out some pens and paper.

I agree with hiccupgirl - YANBU about the lie inn but YABU to expect him to take her out, especially that early in the morning.