To tell ex that he smells?

[PPaka]

Separated, but he's still in the house?
Last night he fell asleep on the couch- a frequent occurence. I told him to go to bed- please don't sleep on the couch.
Then I got a load of abuse, couldn't believe I was having a go at him- he's really tired-blah blah.

The reason I hate him going to sleep on the couch is that he leaves a horrible smell- he sweats a lot when asleep.
I've washed the cushions a couple of times in the last couple of months.
It makes me want to vomit.
It's a horrible sweaty head smell, not bo.

Thanks
We are married

I've just found your posts from Dec/Jan/Feb. Sorry if this is harsh, I can't believe you're still married to and living with this man! Why can't you get a divorce and sell the house ASAP? Is it because you need money for solicitors fees? Could you get Legal Aid or something?

No, no legal aid
I spent £1000 on a solicitor for basically an hours consultation and some notes
If I go down that route I will end up spending £50k which can only be paid from the house. He will not respond to anything, this man has 4 years of tax returns outstanding, he is never going to respond to a solicitors letter.
He won't agree to sell the house, he won't agree to anything
I was out of the house for a month at Easter and most of the Summer hols.
All he needs is deposit for a flat, but he won't save the money

It's hell actually

Sounds simplistic but what would happen if you raised the money for the deposit for a flat yourself and gave it to him - would he go then?

Where do I get that money from?

But yes, if I gave him money he could get a flat.

I looked at increasing the mortgage, but whatever we do with the mortgage we are stuck with for 2 years(penalties) and as we don't know what is going to be the long term solution.
I think we sell the house, take the equity, and we use it either to rent or down as a deposit. I'm a bit stuck then as I'm dependent on maintenance payments for mortgage( there are lenders that will do it) and realistically I'm looking at a very small flat.
But hopefully that's only temporary, until I get my own job.

I started this thread asking about smelly husband, but I always end up having to give the whole story

Sorry, that sounded ungrateful.
But I've exhausted most usual avenues, and it's really not that easy to get someone out of the house if there are intent on staying, if you don't have any money

I'm sorry... I can hear how frustrated you are.

I was thinking something more like literally borrowing the money from a credit card like virgin that transfers money to a current account and then withdrawing the cash and giving it to him. Not ideal to get into (more?) debt but if you're absolutely desperate.... maybe.

I do understand how difficult it must be. I have a mortgage with nationwide that accepts maintenance from my ex.

I started this thread asking about smelly husband, but I always end up having to give the whole story

Oh OP that's because the sweat isn't the problem, but living with an horrible, disrespectful cunt face is the problem!

If the problem was a lovely husband with a sleepy sweat problem it would be easier to solve.

Put sheets on.

Eww. No you're not being unreasonable. There's no excuse to stink in this day and age. You get 4 blocks of soap for £1.

Maybe im just immature but my first course of action would be to drive him insane. stock the cupboards with food he cant stand. cancel subscriptions to stuff he watches on tv, completely ignore him. bring men over (male friends maybe from work that he doesnt know?) and go upstairs with them. watch films or whatever, just do something out of his sight, or better have them pick you up for a 'Date' let him know youve moved on and you dont want him there.
either that or pack his shit and kick him out.

Put fans in the living room, when he falls asleep in the living room crank them up as high as possible, turn the lights on, open all windows and then go out to the kitchen and loudly make food! refuse to do anything to help him. tell him hes not to eat the food you have or use the electricity without contributing, if he wants to be a lodger he may aswell pay his bloody way! constantly bring up how much you want him out, at least once a week, give him numbers to local hostels and charities, if that fails and youre not on a joint tenancy, wait till hes out, chuck all of his stuff out front in black backs with an envelope with say 20 quid in it and label it "taxi money" then change the locks. I would not tolerate my ex in my home.

If you can afford to stay on your own - then pack up his stuff - call the police and tell them what's happening - I've known for them to escort XP's off the premises (need to tell them you are concerned about his abusive behaviour) - then have a locksmith waiting in the wings to change the locks ASAP!!

He's an adult!! He can go to the council for emergency housing! Get well rid!

What Whois said!