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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not buy DS2 (who will be less than a month old) any Xmas presents

68 replies

mrsHawk1ns · 12/09/2014 13:42

Before I get flamed for bringing up Christmas, I KNOW its only September but I'm trying to get a bit organised...

Ds2 is due on 2nd December... AIBU to consider not bothering with presents for him even though it is his First Christmas? Last year was DS1 first xmas, he was 6 months old and had no clue what all the fuss was about, this year he will be 18 months and way more into l everything. And I had the thought that if perhaps we still made it all about him and less about there being a brand new baby then it might make him less jealous. I'm sure DS2 will still get lots of bits from other family, and he doesn't really need anything at that young age anyway (plus we have so much of DS1s stuff we've kept already) I just wanted other opinions I guess!

OP posts:

Original poster

mrsHawk1ns · 12/09/2014 17:22

I love you all! You've put my mind at rest, I will obvs have the obligatory 1st xmas decorations etc (some already been ordered....) and outfits and blankets too but hadn't thought about wrapping them as they would already just 'be there' DS1 was def a pfb and I went completely overboard with presents and stocking from santa etc we even put a carrot out for rudolph so a savings account or premium bond is a really good shout thank you guys, I know my mum for sure will go overboard so as we will be at her house most of the day he will have lots to unwrap for the photos!

OP posts:

MrsWombat · 12/09/2014 19:10

As your eldest won't notice I wouldn't bother, although a few token gifts would be ok.

DS is 6 and would certainly notice if our new baby (will be around a month old) didn't get anything. I'm planning on filling a stocking up with a baby toothbrush, sippy cup, bath toys etc and will need to buy a token present and probably wrap up some new 3-6 month clothes or something.

eastmidswarwicknightnanny · 12/09/2014 19:23

I am due ds2 in Nov n have a 4yr old so will do a stocking with rattles n essentials like weaning spoon n pots for later on. Also brought a couple lamaze toys so they can be wrapped under tree and 4yr old chose a sophie giraffe teether toy for baby for Xmas.

louisejxxx · 12/09/2014 21:22

I would just get "First Christmas" orientated bits as well, like babygro, bib, little teddy etc and leave it at that. If other people ask then aim for useful things or even vouchers that can be saved and spent on toys when baby is a bit older.

katiegee · 12/09/2014 21:36

not unreasonable at all! our first baby is due in December and we're not planning on buying him/her Christmas presents - maybe a token gift wrapped up under the tree but that will be it. I've watched friends and cousins spend literally hundreds of pounds on their child's first (and even second) Christmas and the child has no idea what is going on. Better to stick some money in a savings account if you feel like you're being mean... but I think Christmases will get expensive enough as they get older so why not take advantage of a few cheaper ones?

Good luck for the rest of your pregnancy

RedSoloCup · 12/09/2014 21:39

Not read other replies but have two in December and neither got much the first year (or second really) DC3 got more but more for show for the other DC.

HavingAGoodThink · 12/09/2014 21:58

I'm due on 18th December with dc2. I'll be doing it a stocking with a couple of bits in, but that's for DD's benefit as she'll be 4.7 and very aware of what the baby gets from Father Christmas.

We have also done half of our shopping this month so it can be wrapped and out of the way in good time. There's no way on earth I want to be spending the Christmas run up either dragging my continent-sized self, or a newborn, around shops.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 12/09/2014 22:01

You could get a few things that you'd have got anyway and wrap them up. A nice, warm coat or a few baby books? It might be fun for you, grandparent and DS1. You could even wrap up a few of DS1's old baby toys if you don't think he'll remember them.

squoosh · 12/09/2014 22:24

It certainly wouldn't be unreasonable but I think it would be a bit grinchy of you. I'd also secretly think (but not say) that you were being competitively sensible. I'd have to get him something, even if it was just teeny.

Don't agree with you not getting the baby anything to avoid your other child getting jealous though. How long will you keep that up for?

Sootgremlin · 12/09/2014 23:19

squoosh 'competitively sensible'

CarbeDiem · 12/09/2014 23:40

Yanbu for cost reasons, but I'd wrap up some token presents. Clothes, new blanket, a teddy bear.

I wouldn't do it to ease jealousy issues though - making a rod for your own back there imo.

thicketofstars · 13/09/2014 01:36

We spent the money of momentos of our DD's arrival, rather than gifts exactly. Not on the high street have beautiful framed name plaques and engraved silver christening bangles. We knew in years to come she would (a) treasure them, (b) have other ideas for what her Christmas gift should be!

thicketofstars · 13/09/2014 01:36

money on

MrsMook · 13/09/2014 05:04

DS was due a few days before Christmas. We had no idea if we would have a baby or a bump, be at home or in hospital on Christmas Day. He turned out to be on his second day at home. We didn't do presents. He was baby 1, and the whole experience was very surreal. Mentally, I feel that his first Christmas was the week he turned 1. He was given a baby's first Christmas babygrow which has never been used as both DCs were too big at birth.

DS2 was 9m last year. We saved and hid the next stage of baby toys, and wrapped them for him, so he had presents, but it just seemed daft to buy more for the sake of Christmas, when we already had enough to satisfy DS1's needs already.

Presents from family are more exciting than unwrapping what you wrapped yourself.

poolomoomon · 13/09/2014 08:05

Even though he'll be very young it is still his first Christmas... why don't you get one of the first Christmas bears? I got all of my DC the mamas&papas one with their names on the back for their first Christmas. We still bring them out every Christmas now, it's a lovely memento to have. Also a bauble for the tree? And maybe just some PJs or something.

hiccupgirl · 13/09/2014 09:26

My DS was born just before Christmas and we didn't even think of getting him any Christmas presents...we'd already bought loads of baby things so I suppose these could have been his presents if needed.

Tbh your DS1 isn't going to remember or really notice if you don't get your second any presents. You could always get a small token gift like a cuddly toy for the show of it but otherwise I wouldn't bother. Save it for when they're both bigger and start expecting Father Christmas to bring things.

Leonas · 13/09/2014 20:00

We have a December baby too and we got her a small present last year so we can tell her in future when her first Xmas present was!

Tallypet · 13/09/2014 20:18

I am the same. I bought DS something small for Christmas (He's a November baby) and still do for birthdays and Christmas. We're lucky that he (he is nearly 4 now) still doesn't see Christmas or his birthday as a gluttonous present fest.
Unfortunately I've seen many mums with cupboards full of gifts and it's outrageous. We have special days away and lovely memories - not piles of plastic tat

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