To think a disabled adult shouldnt be left in bed til 10am because the council cant be arsed to find someone to do their care

[BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability]

Ffs. Really good start to the day, me crying in bed while the kids slowly dismantle their bedroom. I usually need a bit of a hand to get up, but today my back completely seized, my wrists are too bad too pull myself up and i was stuck. DH got in off nights at 10 am, helped me get up, carried me downstairs and did us all breakfast before going to bed.

The council have agreed care, but because of Dhs shift pattern, cant find anyone to do it. So they gave me direct payments, but i cant find anyone either. Had three people, (a friend, my sister and my bil) who all now have full time jobs and are unavailable. So now, this week, i've had a letter from them saying "as you NO LONGER WANT ASSISTANCE we are going to take you off our list".

I am sick of this. Why is everythign so fucking hard :(

I'm sorry it's so frustrating. I hope you can challenge them.

Can you use a care agency, their hours might cost you more than the direct payments rate but it would be something at least. It is hard finding help though, I'm in the same situation with my ds, hoping you get it sorted.

I am so sorry. I have been in the same state myself for a few days last week. I resent all the tax I and my family have paid into the system. I feel the system has broken the contract, you pay tax if you need help we will give it, well they do not help, they blame you and fob you off.

Teresa May said the terrorists are psychopaths, I often wonder if those in government are too after the nonsense with the King family and the way the vulnerable are being treated in the UK.

Have you tried Leonard Cheshire Disibility?

Have you put an advert in the local paper, there's quite a few in ours.

It doesn't seem like a case of 'can't be arsed' though. They couldn't find anyone, you have backed that up by saying you cannot find anyone.

I know it is not good, but they cannot help it.

Maybe try a private agency and use the direct payments for that?

What area are you OP?

Completely agree RE direct payments, what use is the money to pay for things if you can't actually access the right services to pay them? Makes no sense! Having the same problem with ds2 and direct payments for respite :/

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Ah that sounds tough. Have you put an advert in the local paper. I noticed your previous helpers were all friends or family. Or as others have suggested a local care agency?

Sorry about my pathetic attempt to link but my friend is severely disabled and uses them.

I havent tried much yet, i moan about adult services but havent been great at helping myself. I guess i was expecting them to try harder and its been an interesting eye opener.
I'm not really coping with it mentally atm, have chronic depression anyway since before i was ill, and just want to crawl into a hole tbh.

Council do it through an agency, it was them who couldnt do the hours. Ridiculous as thats the point of an agency! (Im a forner rec con ffs)

What we need is for dh to quit work, but cant cope with the drop in income :(

I'm in newport (in s wales, not one of the other ones)

Yes its been advertised, jcp and paper. 0 responses. I know why, its cause theyve only allocated 1.5 hours a day. Its just not worth it for anyone unless they live practically on my street.

What call times do you need?

I work for a community care agency & we offer calls from 6.30am to 10.30pm, 365 days a year.

Thanks to everyone, i'm just feeling particularly low about it due to rough day + the letter. I know the council arent doing it on purpose.

Half hour morning, half hour lunch, half hour dinner. I'd work around whatever hours anyone could do - its better than having nothing!!

There must be alternative agencies in your area. Its not a case of can't be arsed, the LA has provided the funding for it. But if theres no one local to you, then an agency is the way forward. One worker can do 1.5 hrs because their income is boosted by other work from the agency.

I can normally get up (just about, with a pull from one of the boys). The help allowance is mainly for food prep etc

Just got into a bit of a panic earlier that if dh had been on days, i'd be stuck til night time with two starving, crying children (who cant get past the baby gate), as noone would be coming. If my help was arranged, at least they'd be scheduled to arrive before then. Catastrophic thinking, i know what it is looking back :)

If you can be flexible with your call times, there must be an agency who can fit you in.

I would be livid with Social Services for not finding me one too! I work for Sevacare, and we have a branch in Newport. Do you know if they have been contacted?

Oh, and as Dancing says, a Carer working for an agency will be visiting a list of clients - so although they only have 1.5 hours a day with you, they will still be doing a full-time job overall. I have clients who only have 15 minutes once a day .

I would ignore your DH shift patterns and work around the care for you.

If DH is home, then when the career come then regardless if DH is home let them in to do what needed.

Aww lovey you not got it sorted yet try a carers agency yourself I know you think its a hassle for them but as a pp said they are working shift s so you woul d be part of the shift.

I agree you need to look after your needs even if your husband is not at work you can still have a carer in

The nature of care work is that they work strange hours often with a break of several hours between clients. A carer will have several clients in any given day.

You are being really nice about this oh ill do what suits them so its not a bother type thing you need to be a little bit assertive about it. For example you want 8 12 6 so that is what you ask and pay for. Sounds like your not in a great place atm being disabled and ill with young children is just shit some times