to ask if teenagers are a lot more expensive than children?

[burgatroyd]

Yesterday I asked advice on how to stop my rather irrational broody feelings. Money is a large factor for me not considering a third as I hear teenagers are a LOT more expensive than young children. So though I could possibly afford more kids now would worry I'd find it tough when they are older.

Those with teenagers or older kids, do you find it a lot more expensive?

It depends on whether or not you need childcare. As we both worked our kids were more expensive when younger. as teenagers they can look after themselves when they come home from school and make their own way to and from school. They both have PAYG phones they pay for out of their pocket money. We don't buy them label clothes and they aren't that superficial thankfully. Clothes and activities are more expensive but compared to the large costs of childcare for primary school kids it is a small cost.
If you are a SAHM secondary school kids will be more expensive.

Oh God yes, the showers! I've had to buy a timer!

I'm going to make a lasagne at the weekend and portion it up, that's a great idea.

Yes a great deal more expensive.

Last year I had to buy my 14 yo 4 pairs of dance shoes (£180) Duke of Edinburgh Award money £80, money for Home Ec at school £40, and dance fees for the month £100.

£400 spend in two days- and she is not my only teenager!!

An example of an unnecessary expense maybe, but the price hike is eye watering:

An adult and two 11 year olds, admission to the Matisse exhibition at Tate Modern: £18.

An adult, one 13yo and one 14yo : £50.

Regretfully, we had to give it a miss.

OP, you have had a lot of honest responses.

But when I found out I was pg when DC 3 my reasoning for continuing with the pg was that I would rather sit in an old peoples home chatting about my three DC and and grandchildren I might have, than what nice dresses and cars I owned.

I don't have a nice car, or that many nice dresses, and yes, we do sometimes leave DH at home because it's too expensive to take him on a day out, but if you want a DC3, in all honesty finances aren't going to stop you, unless you really will only be able to afford enough bread and milk for four people rather than 5.

The big problems for us were; DC not wanting to share bedrooms, and finding hotel rooms which you can cram 5 people into. (They're rare; the last time I stayed in a hotel was 8 years ago).

As for Sixth Form. £500 a year for the same bus route as was free last year.

£17 for tie, planner and something else.
£6.50 for a trip and two almost £20 textbooks and it's only the second day of term.

Ds1 this week- school uniform plus blazer, shoes, indoor and outdoor trainers, rugby boots, cadet boots, cadet fees for year and compulsory school trip I know dont get me started 545 aprox.

He also does one sport- kit, comp entry fees, transport plus parental entrance, he has also achieved his last goal and the recognition has to be paid for- 115(thats with 2nd hand kit).

He also needs to follow a very good diet plan not like his mother which is more expensive, I used to be able to feed all five of us with 50. He is 14 and has started to take his sport very seriously, even cut out chocolate, biscuits, bread and cakes this week.

He is always hungry and just keeps growing though, I suspect he will need new uniform at Christmas.(sob)

Excellent point about giving your teenager an allowance and letting them budget etc - so many threads on mumsnet point to relationship breakdowns due to budgeting issues so why not start young?

If your child (like mine) needs expensive sports kit surely this can be a Christmas or birthday present unlike all the ipad for Christmas presents threads.

I appreciate (private) school uniforms are expensive but surely this only applies to a few mumsnetters?
As for buying your teenager make up and hair straighteners - the mind boggles .

There must be a lot of entitled teenagers around.

I'm thinking of the money saved now that we don't need babysitters/nappies/play school fees/swimming lessons etc .

State school uniform has become increasingly expensive. I get off lightly (£9 polos, £18 sweatshirt, M&S trousers, £25 rugby shirt etc) but friends are less fortunate, having to buy regulation everything (bespoke blazer linings, special piping on trousers). And then there's those estate agent suits for sixth form.

Expensive non-school sports kit we do for birthdays and Christmas.

ragwort indeed you can give big ticket items as birthday gifts.

DS got footie boots, shinnies, a new strip to train in for his birthday. But this was £120 plus.

In addition to this will be subs (75), club strip (40), travel to a match every Sunday.

This is one hobbie for one teen!

I really think it's a bit unfair to give sports kit as a Christmas present unless it's to bulk out with other gifts.

It depends of course, example they need new football boots, I can get dd2 a perfectly good pair now for about £30-50 pounds, if she wants a £160 pair that could be a Christmas present.

Anyway yes teens more expensive, girls worse than boys, my dd1 is not high maintenance but everything costs adult prices, clothes, haircuts, etc, she's also got a social life which means more pocket money, and my god can she eat.

And if you go out to eat, it's adult menus not kids.

She's v good though, will look around for best prices on things she wants, actually saved me on her school uniform this year. But why wouldn't you get her some make up and beauty tools if she wanted? Why would it make the mind boggle?

I want her to be happy and feel accepted in her family and her peer group. It's possible to do that without making her entitled. She realises the value of money and rarely asks for things so when she does, I'm usually happy to oblige.

RJ in my defence, ds could borrow his kit - he's chosen to have his own, Gucci kit instead. I think it's reasonable, if they choose an extensive pastime or to make that pastime dearer than it could be, that they contribute in some way.

For the avoidance of doubt, I mean Gucci in the colloquial sense :D

I'm not sure I agree with girls bring more expensive than boys,I think they're the same!

I wouldn't give school kit/essentials as gifts.

But upgrades I do.

I think the upshot of this thread is that anyone can spend as little as they like on their DC.

They can keep them very short,feed them cheap food, expect them to wear second hand clothes, curtail hobbies and interests.

No law against it .

But of you want your teen to have a reasonably comfortable existence then it costs a lot!

Straighteners are as basic a took as a hair drier,I had a Braun hot brush when I was a teen,I want entitled at all. They don't have to be GHD's, you can buy straighteners for 30 quid and lots of teen girls I know have them for xmas our birthday presents.

Oh good grief. My 5 and 2 year olds cost me £800 a month in childcare and about another £800 in lost earnings by working part time. You mean they're going to cost me more than £1600 a month!

Absolutely positively yes yes yes.

And after the teenage school years there's uni.

No idea how students manage through uni without parental top up.

All of ours worked but still needed help with rent and books.

It's very very expensive.

I really don't think the odd tube of BB cream or lip gloss and a set of hair straighteners means my DD is entitled.

With sports/hobbies equipment, we tend to buy the basics, but if she wants the more expensive stuff she has to wait for birthday/Christmas. For example, DD1 surfs, I was happy to buy her a cheap surf board not that they're particularly cheap in the first place but she wanted a specific one, which was about £60 more expensive than the basic one - she got it for her birthday. Wetsuits - again, happy to buy the basics, but she wanted a specific type so she got it for Christmas.

I tend to think if I've got it, they're welcome to it.

I do think that socialising and spending time with her friends is important and I don't mind bunging her a tenner for the cinema now and then - it's not every week, or even every month.

When the time comes, we will be paying for driving lessons too. We live semi-rurally, buses are OK 9-5, but non existent at night and very few taxis so being able to get around under their own steam is important, and I don't want to be driving them around forever. It's our choice to live where we do, we knew that driving lessons/Mum's taxi would feature heavily when we moved here

I don't say no for the sake of it. If we can afford it, them I'm happy to oblige. Neither of my 2 have regular pocket money and have never constantly asked for stuff and if I can't give it to them, then they're fine with that.

When I was growing up I had very controlling parents, was never allowed to do anything, certainly never allowed to go to the cinema with friends, to wear make up, or even choose my own clothes and hair style. I don't want that for my children. I don't want her to feel uncomfortable or left out, and I do think it's possible to do that without ending up with a spoilt, entitled nightmare

Bike no, they don't cost £1600 a month! But when people talk about children being inexpensive, how feed their family on one Magic Chicken a week and trips out involve rice cake snacks and observing leaves, you can guarantee their children are not teenagers

We're increasingly finding that extracurriculars add up to a lot.

Music lessons used to be one child, one instrument, for half an hour. But DS is doing music A-level, for which piano skills are 'very strongly recommended' -- so now it's an hour of his main instrument PLUS half an hour of slightly desperate piano catch-up.

Plus he needs a replacement tuba .

Plus DD is now having music lessons because it wasn't fair to offer it for one child and not the others. (Moral: don't start anything unless you can afford it for all three.)

Other DS sails. He suffers from depression and this is hugely beneficial to him. He has just crunched his (old, secondhand but eyewateringly expensive) boat, bought from a combination of savings and birthday money. There's no way a Saturday job is going to cover the repair or even the insurance excess...

All our own fault. Looking at leaves sounds like a much better hobby to me, Massa!

I wouldn't like to receive practical items for my birthday or christmas so why would I make my kids have them?

DD1 usually adds an item of make up to the weekly shopping about once a month, and we are happy to allow her to because her allowance is spent on getting the bus to the nearest town and socialising with her friends. We chose to live rurally and the bus is nearly a fiver for a return ticket before she even thinks about paying for lunch or a drink.

Would that be the Magic Chicken that my ds polished off for a snack last night?

I'm used to ft child care will it surely not be more than that