Getting DH to STFU

[dancingwithmyselfandthecat]

I have workmen in at the moment and am freelancing as well. The noise/disruption has been so great today that I need to work now they are gone.

DH has just left for the gym. Between him coming home from work and leaving for the gym - about half an hour - he wouldn't shut up. "Oooh, the floor, so that's what they've done. Where are my gym shoes? Oh, here are my shoes. I do actually really like these shoes, so much better than the last pair. I will pop in and get some milk on may way back, didn't on my way home because..." you get the picture. Not exactly talking to me, but expecting me to listen and reply in some form. Ignoring fact that I am working. Eventually I snapped and told him to give me some piece and quiet because it was obvious that I was working (sitting at desk, on laptop!).

He has form for this. He simply can't resist coming to speak to me when I am working - to tell me that my favourite programme is about to start (I know that, that's why it's being recorded and the sky button turned blue). To tell me about the new routine he's trying at the gym, or something he saw on his way home. I love him dearly but it is always inconsequential stuff and it is not as if I am always working (I always stop by eight).

He doesn't get - and has never got - the usual sort of signals people give out "uh huhs" when you don't look up, "just a minute please dear" sorts of things, so every single time I lose it. Not shouting and screaming but a very firm "leave me alone". And then he gets sad or put out. On particularly frustrating occassions he will take himself off to do Noisy Tidying.

He does this when I read for leisure at weekends as well. I don't mind if he wants either to start a conversation or to ask me a one-off question, but I really resent being interrupted by this inane gabble.

AIBU and/or a complete bitch? (No kids BTW so not like I have to fend this off from toddlers as well).

My husband doesn't do this at all. He's great. Especially first thing in the morning, it takes me such a long time to wake up and be capable of coherent speech but he knows this and will just say hello and give me a hug without expecting any conversation.

My mum however - when my husband first met her he proclaimed wide-eyed that she was "a wall of noise", and it's true. She never, ever, ever, ever stops talking. It really is a constant monologue, not really to anyone in particular just as long as there's someone within earshot. She tells you the same stories about the same people (who you don't know) over and over. Even in the car she'll mention everything she drives past. "There's the butchers. Did you know John who owns it sold his house and is building a big new one up the road. Blah blah blah." My dad is able to mentally switch her off and even manages to watch TV programs through the noise. I must have been able to when I lived with her but I can't these days and anything more than a day or two I start to lose my patience. My poor husband can't bear it at all, he's someone who likes a nice bit of peace and quiet, and when we stay with my folks he often ends up hiding in the bedroom.

She's a lovely person, very kind and generous, but oh so tiring to spend any length of time around. Thankfully I haven't inherited it, I'm hoping I don't develop it when I get older though!

YANBU. My DH will be a bit like this sometimes... I'll be finally sat down watching a programme and he'll shout out comments about his computer game from the study, occasionally asking me to see what I think about his new town layout & give him some advice. He will often say 'I reckon I've got it sorted now - come and look', so I say 'Do you really need me to?', get grumbles, then go and look only to stand uncomfortably while he shifts things around and reveals that actually, he hasn't 'got it' and I'm expected to stand there watching him think aloud. I go quickly usually and say to call me when he really has.

MIL is like this. She just does not stop talking and it drives me barmy. She says the same thing over and over, talks over you, calls every night to ask the most trivial questions. I dread having to drive her anywhere because it's just this ceaseless jibber jabber.