To leave a decent paying job as it makes me ill?

[ginorwine]

Have professional job- rewarding but v stressful. Off work with anxiety and was two years ago for same reason. I only work part time but take extra work home with me and think about work . Have had cbt in past which worked for short while. If I leave we will have to move house and not be in position to help our dc in future - weddings , help at uni etc. this is because I can't get another job to pay half of what I earn now and would not be able to fund a car. If I leave I do not want to have a v responsible job , I feel totally burnt out , hence my potential wage would reflect that, I feel guilty that am letting family down and reducing our income significantly as well as having to move house. We have done the maths. Anyone else been in this position?

You must put your own health and wellbeing before hypothetical events in the future. Don't worry about weddings - by the time your dcs are old enough to consider marriage they'll be old enough to fund their own! If they go to uni they can get loans like most other students. Also, most of us will be working until well into what used to be considered older age so while retiring early is a great option, it's still a luxury not afforded to many.

The impact and long term consequences of you breaking down completely and being unable to work at all would be far greater than any need to make shorter-term economies right now. You are commendably unselfish but actually, it is time to put you first. Not least because if you safeguard your wellbeing, everyone else in the family will benefit.

Life is for living - don't waste it worrying about work. Money is not everything, and the end of the day your family will value your health and happiness over anything.

I completely agree with people saying that if your job is making you I'll then it's time to change job.
What I'm not sure about from your posts is whether it's the job itself that is the issue.
You say that you have a professional job that is rewarding.
But you think about it all the time.
What makes you think that with a job that doesn't have as much responsibility then you still wouldn't think about it all the time? I know a lot of people with jobs that hold small responsibilities that can't switch from what happens at work and what they need to do the next day etc...
And on the other side you would end up in a job that is highly likely to be far less rewarding.

The question is really 'Do you like your job, apart from bringing it back home?' If yes then the answer is to learn to separate home and work. No more work from home, no checking emails, no mobile on. You get the idea.
If the answer is No, then spend some time looking for a job that really suits you and acknowledge that your standard of living will be different.

Tbh I have done that. Change my job for one that suits me better re home work balance. As it happens I am now earning more or less as much as I was before, even though about 10 years have gone by (dcs, retraining, building up the business etc). But I am happier.
What I would want to be careful is run from the problem (dealing with life work balance) only to find it again with another job and less money iyswim.

No job is more important than your health.