To wonder why so many MNers treat FB with such disdain?

[moominmarvellous]

Not so much a thread about a thread as a thread based on several.

There seems to be a nasty undercurrent on Mumsnet that Facebook/Social Media (yes, including the current ice phenomenon) is for plebs and those who are self centred or somehow out of touch with reality.

The same remarks are to be found on pretty much all threads that mention FB - along the lines of:

'You're not a teenager!'

'How do you have time for it?'

'You do know it's not real?'

'It's so self absorbed/self centred/ Me, me, me'

Mumsnet Talk is itself a form of social media, on which we all air our personal views and opinions, and which we all find time for. TBH more time than it takes scrolling through an FB newsfeed.

But also our children will at some point, if not already, be experiencing many of the issues that online communication presents. They'll come to us for advice on managing online relationships and/or we'll have to deal with the fallout of something said or posted in haste or poor judgement.

It seems to me that those not making the time for it - even on a basic level are actually leaving themselves out of touch with how society and communication is changing?

It probably colours my view that I work with teens on issues surrounding the ways in which they communicate and form relationships (on and offline) and to see so many negative, and in some cases uninformed* opinions on a parenting site is a bit worrying.

Ah ok. Why do you think that statement is ridiculous?

It is like Twitter- it took me ages to understand it. I ditched most of the 'celebrities' or well known people and there are lovely, artistic, motivational, helpful people on there. It always shocks me to come out of my cosy compartment and find really horrible people tweeting. Social media can be good or bad, depending on how you use it.

Social media is just society. It/interacting with it is neither good nor bad, useful nor damaging, or anything else in particular. FB makes interacting with your chosen bits of society easier and quicker, sure, but that's all.

"I think that because a lot of the problems and fallings out posted about on MN are caused or exacerbated by FB, it has the effect of making FB and a fair number of its users appear vacuous and self-absorbed. This effect is exaggerated when the fallings out posted about lean towards the more immature end of dissent, such as disagreements over inane statuses."

Agree with you Liney.

I quite like facebook. It is handy for keeping in touch, quicker than texting sometimes. I can almost never be bothered to put photos up. I've only got 60 something fb friends and I've only felt the need to hide one, who uses it to advertise her business.

"I think that because a lot of the problems and fallings out posted about on MN are caused or exacerbated by FB, it has the effect of making FB and a fair number of its users appear vacuous and self-absorbed. This effect is exaggerated when the fallings out posted about lean towards the more immature end of dissent, such as disagreements over inane statuses."

Agree. I'm not disdainful of Facebook but I use it with discernment. As a means of keeping up with friends and family scattered around the world it is excellent. However, I truly doubt that it was ever intended to be a virtual version of taking someone outside for a good kicking.

If they're upset by what's on their newsfeed they only have themselves to blame. They choose their friends, likes, and pages to follow.

So if they think FB is just teenage bullshit, they might want to look in the mirror and wonder why they attract friends that are into teenage bullshit...

I agree with the others who have said it's not Facebook that is the problem, it's the people you have added. If you constantly have the 'I hate cancer' posts, people arguing or other twatty posts then you clearly know idiots! It's up to you who you add and who you see on your timeline.

Some of us are Facebook generation - old enough to have been on right in the early days but young enough not to have had much/any adulthood without it. Let's say those about 25-35.

FB isn't much use for people who see their friends all the time, such as teenagers. It was designed for university students and graduates who don't expect to live in the same city/region/country as their family and friends, and have most of their experiences on their own or in small groups. It's a godsend for us, or we'd have been permanently separated. You don't have to pick your audience - you put it out there and those who are interested join in.

I have a lot of FB friends - maybe 600? - and the usual sneer from MN is that one can't possibly have that many friends. Well, not all at once, but over four schools, a university, three jobs, three cities, three children, large family, etc etc ... six hundred people you've been close to doesn't sound like that many.

And how could I tell that it would be a girl from school I'd end up talking through a miscarriage? I learn things from my friends, and from their friends, why not?

I have great content on my FB - interesting blogs on topics unrelated to the reason I know the blogger (eg spo friend's fashion blog), itelligent political debate or philosophial pondering, also births, marriages and deaths (mercifully few of the latter so far). It's all stuff you'd know automatically if you lived in thesm same village as them, but m y village yis virtual and without it my life would be immeasurably harder.

Totally agree Mrs Hathaway I Facebook friends I have never met in person another thing that is sneered on here but as I said upthread when you have a child with a rare genetic disorder sometimes the only people who can understand what I,m going through are other people wh o have children with the same or similar conditions sometimes however these people live thousands of miles away they have all helped me however !

Since discovering mumsnet earlier this year I hardly go on Facebook, or as it should be known- facebrag or fakebook.
The amount of lies on there is unbelievable, my friend across the close last year posted that she was at a certain high profile concert and I could see her in her kitchen, then she went and put the bins out and I just laughed to myself, it's quite pathetic.
Primarily, I only use it to keep in contact with friends and family who live far away.
Some people live their life through fb, I can't stand the pictures of people's breakfast/lunch/dinner. Yes, we all eat, you wouldn't post a picture of every cup of tea you drank! I don't get it.

I don't like Facebook because I'm concerned about maintaining privacy and about what it might do with my data.

I have a friend who doesn't search using google for the same reason.