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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To consider this? Re children going to park alone...

61 replies

MrsWinnibago · 14/08/2014 10:48

DD1 is just turned 10. DD2 is 6 and a half. Can I let DD1 take DD2 to the park up the road?

It's a big park....which is what worries me really, surrounded by bike track and fields. The park itself though is close to the path and road but fenced in.

DD1 already goes to the shops nearby alone....but she's never been alone to the park....always gone with friends her own age.

My sister says DD1 is too young to be responsible for a very lively 6 year old. What to do?

Shall I just wait till DD2 is a bit older? They play outside a bit but only in the garden. the park is less than 5 mins walk away....

OP posts:

ThatBloodyWoman · 18/08/2014 17:11

I think 10 is too young to be responsible for a 6 year old.

KellyElly · 18/08/2014 18:24

notso I think social ideas on caring for children have changed. Lots of things that were acceptable years ago aren't now, smacking and smoking around children for example.

The scenario you describe about the broken leg with six year olds hurting themselves while totally unsupervised would possibly be referred to child services now.

Things change. Just because they were done a certain way years ago doesn't make it a right or better way.

melissa83 · 18/08/2014 18:36

All 6 year olds are out here. Its not changed at all dependent on where you live.

Notso · 18/08/2014 19:02

It doesn't mean the change is for the better either though Kelly and it doesn't mean that children are any different either.
My older two children were walking to the shop and crossing a road at 6 and 7. They weren't playing out because there was no-one to play with, but I wouldn't have had an issue with it if there was.
RE the broken leg thing child on swing jumps off and breaks leg, DH did the same but broke his arm not leg with his Mum in the park. What is the CP issue there exactly?

KellyElly · 18/08/2014 19:04

Def no unsupervised little kids out where I live in London. They play in the communal gardens but that's all locked in. Never seen any in the park without a parent.

KellyElly · 18/08/2014 19:07

notso The situation with the mum is different as they are with an adult, so supervised. Without an adult at six and breaking a bone is more likely to raise questions. The two situations are very different.

melissa83 · 18/08/2014 19:08

Londons very different. Dh grew up in the north, me in the midlands and now live in south. All the places are nicr and the type of places young children play out. Its not like that in London as its unsafe and dangerous.

springchickennolonger · 18/08/2014 19:18

No kids out here either. But I think we generally underestimate the capabilities of children nowadays. I was walking to school (as was everyone else) sans parent at 6.

I had odd looks for sending my dd to school unattended by a parent at the grand old age of nine!

I suppose it depends on the circumstances, but I don't see anything amiss about expecting a reasonably capable 10 to look after a reasonably well-behaved 6 year old.

In the good old days, it was de rigeur in large families otherwise how could a mother have managed?

TattyDevine · 18/08/2014 19:27

With the "right" combo of 6 and 10 it could work fine, but if you have doubts then perhaps not yet. It might be but a year or so till its fine.

ohtheholidays · 18/08/2014 19:43

No,no way.God forbid anything should ever happen to anyone's children but if it does and it's something horrendous you can't take it back.

last year myself and DH were over the park with our 4 youngest and we noticed a young guy hanging around and he was acting really oddly.
He was paying a lot of interest in two young children a little girl and boy of about 10 and 6(they were really small for age)I went and spoke to the little girl and asked her if she knew the man and she didn't but she said he had been following them(turned out he'd followed them from near they're house)I told DH(he's a policeman)another couple of older children that we know were over the park and came and told us that the guy was strange and they were sure he wasn't supposed to be around children(they're words)DH was already on the phone to the police as soon as he gave them a description of him 2 police cars and a police van was sent out with a police dog(there's massive fields like a forest right next to the park)DH was asked to make sure the guy didn't get away.

He did a runner into the fields and DH gave chase,he managed to get the guy just as all the police went racing past and went straight into the fields to arrest him.

I walked the little girl and boy home and told her what had happened.The children were really shook up bless them.The mum was in shock and said she'd never let them go over there on they're own again.The little girl clung onto me when I got home and said thank you and she said good! to her Mum she said she never wanted to go there again without her Mum or Dad.

I don't know what the guy had done in the past(I didn't want to know)but the arresting police officers spoke to my DH and he said what he'd done in the past was horrendous.

I just don't think it's worth the risk.

Notso · 18/08/2014 19:50

Maybe although when I think about the times I have taken my DC to A+E with suspected breaks I don't recall them or me being asked if I was there or not. In fact the most recent time when DS2 sprained his ankle I wasn't there and said specifically said I wasn't so didn't really know what he did, it wasn't questioned.

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