To impose strict rules on "Gaming Night"

[phonebox]

DH enjoyed a rare evening without me last night as I was at a party.

It appears he spent the time re-acquainting himself with a beloved PC game of his that I have moaned about him playing in front of me before, because it affects his mood - it makes him zoned out and spacey, even to the point of verbal aggression before. This is most unlike him normally but he gets addicted and then frustrated with the game.

Anyway lately he has dramatically cut down on his gaming as we've found hobbies we like doing together and he's been busy with work.

When I got back from the party he asked me if he could have "Gaming Night" one night a week where he just plays non-stop games all evening, as he used to before he met me (only it was more like 6 days a week then!).

AIBU to allow the gaming, but insist he does not play in the front room and that he stops immediately if I need him for something, with a complete ban if it makes him angry again?

We don't have DC (yet) but I don't like the way gaming completely zones him out in the way no other interest of his does - it's somewhat alienating.

Another one that wants to know what game he is playing. Also, what exactly it is that he would need to stop the game immediately to assist you? This has been asked a few time, and not been answered yet.

I think yabu to dictate whether what he does in his spare time. He is at home with you still, just wants to enjoy his hobby. We are a family of gamers (dh & ds1 &ds2 more so) and I'm quite happy to use the free time in the evening to MN, read, have long phone calls to friends etc. Sometimes I will join in & play too for a while.We don't do this every evening, which would probably start to annoy me tbh.

Is your dh waiting for you to decide btw? What did you tell him when new he did ask?

Sorry, meant to add that regarding his behaviour towards you yanbu. That part I agree with you. He has to be able to 'switch off' from gaming mode when he has stopped playing. I would definitely talk to him about that, though wouldn't make it a condition whether he gets to play or not.

Your dh has a right to enjoy his hobby. You have a right to be treated with respect.

I think OP has completely justified being controlling about his game-playing in her original post.

No, you shouldn't respond to someone else's unacceptable behaviour by being controlling.
Being controlling is not an acceptable way to behave.