neighbours complaining about noise

[Catherine928]

Hi I live in a terraced house with my partner, son of 14 and a ten month old girl we have lived here for 5 and a half years and In the last month our neighbours have been in knocking our door and sending us solicitors letters complaing about banging doors pulling out chairs talking in de back garden and my baby playing with a little bouncy ball they also have a 5 month old baby which they say is very sensitive to noise Im at my wits end and fell ive to tiptoe around my own house half the times they say noise is coming from my house im not home both myself and my partner work and im also career for my terminal ill mother what can I do I could do without this stress and hassle

Let's hope Citizens Advice can recommend something. In the meantime, don't be intimidated by their solicitor.

Them choosing to have their house in complete silence is their choice, and they have no right to foist their choices upon you.

Call your council and speak to EH health. say you have been told your making a noise and you don't want to make a noise but you feel what they are accusing you of is un fair and how to deal with it!

Ask EH for reasonable guidelines of every day living.

Trust me, as someone has complained in the past about truly horrendous neighbour noise, I can promise you that nobody is remotely interested in normal living noise - doors slamming, chairs moving etc etc.
they are harassing you and being absolutely ridiculous. It's kind of you to put felt on the chairs, but don't worry about anything else.
Check out neighbours from hell in Britain for some great ideas on how to cope with nuisance neighbours (which they are!!!)

If you both live in a terrace, do they contact their neighbours on the other side too? It would be interesting to see if there are problems there too.
Do you have problems with your other side?

Tbh I think it is their problem. When we had one DC the house was always quiet and we did our best to keep it that way. This meant that DC was a very light sleeper. When DC 2 and 3 came along there was regular noise in the house. DC3 is a really heavy sleeper.

We had a similar situation who neighbours in a previous house. We made normal household noise (if anything we were quieter than normal to avoid setting them off). They convinced themselves that we were stomping around and making noise to wind them up so would shout abuse, send stroppy notes, and turn on loud music at night to 'teach us a lesson'. They said we shouldn't wear shoes in the house (we rarely did anyway), shouldn't go upstairs more than once a day, etc etc.

In desperation we contacted our local community policeman who said that this amounted to harassment and he had a word with them. He advised them to contact the local council's environmental health people and log a complaint with them (about us) recording all our unreasonable behaviour. We also contacted the council and explained the situation (to the effect that we were only making normal household noise but they wouldn't believe us). There then followed a two week period where they had to log any of our 'unreasonable' noise behaviour which, of course they couldn't, and were told that if they harassed us any more then the Police would be involved officially. It did stop the problem but it was hell to live there and be on eggshells the whole time.

I was also advised to record on my phone any conversations with them as evidence of harassment.

It sounds to me like your neighbours have lost all reason as part of that newborn sleep deprivation thing and are listening out for very little sound.

The only way this will end is when one of you moves, I fear.

In the face of their solicitors letter though op, talk to the people who know the law in this area and deal with disputes all the time, the EH dept at your cuncil.

OP, what did the Solicitors letter say? What actual legal action were they threatening you with if you don't comply?

Noise issues can only be dealt with by your local council, not by civil action - and trust me they want to hear cannons going off hourly before they will take 'excessive noise' seriously.

Ignore them and/or tell them you will call the police if they don't stop harassing you.

Just a note to say, if you do record conversations, you might put yourself in a better position if you tell them explicitly each time that you are recording - and of course, make sure you say the words again after you have pressed the "record" button.

ah, sorry, I need to correct myself - your neighbours can take legal action privately, but they would have a hard time proving anything AND they have to prove THEY have acted reasonably in dealing with you first.

They might also have gained legal aid for this, sadly.

It does sound like they are over-reacting though. Good luck OP.

FFS when will people realise it is only a baby fgs.
Keeping a baby in a silent house is making a rod for their own backs and totally neurotic. Wonder if they both have pnd or have worked the idea of having a baby into something it is not. We deliberately kept up normal noise levels when ours were little so that they learned to sleep through it.

They are being unreasonable. Yy to carpets etc. Door anti-slammer protectors are a good idea for finger safety anyway (you get ones where door will only shut if done slowly, great for training kids)

But tbh they sound mental, precious and irritating.

Oh god I was like this when my DS was 4-5 months. Utterly exhausted, sensitive to noise beyond all reason. My DS was a bit sensitive to noise too, but that was because he was teething and I had no idea. I never complained to the neighbours or anything, but would sit and seethe if anyone dared knock the door/turn a car engine on/talk to someone else in the street while DS was napping! Insane.

I got over it in time and now DS would sleep through a baby elephant going down stairs on a tin tray. I'm sure things will improve as their baby gets older and starts making a racket itself!

I've had a similar kind of thing....lived in my terraced house for a year, have a near 4 year old DD who makes the usual amout of noise, never had any complaints. Then we got new neighours and they had a baby at Christmas.
I was shocked at the amount of noise that came through from them, baby always seemed unsettled and cried alot, and still does. I can hear it every time he is crying no matter what room I am in in the house. Nextdoors DH comes in late most nights from work, slams front door, slams hallway door and then slams cupboards in the kitchen.
I have never ever said anything to them about the noise although it does disturb us (their DS wakes me up at 4.45 every morning) because I remember when my DD was small and I would have been mortified if anyone had said anything, I didn't want to put any pressure on them and I didn't know if they were having problems with their DS etc.

A few weeks ago, next doors DH came banging on my door, we had other neighbours over for a cuppa and I opened the front door to be told off about the 'banging' my DD was doing and could we please keep it down as they couldnt get their DS off to sleep. This was about 5.30pm.

After my initial embarrassment I asked him to speak outside as told him in no uncertain terms that firstly, it was rude to come to my door ranting, epecially as he could see I had guests. Secondly, my DD was not banging, she was sitting on the sofa as he could plainly see and thirdly, it is not my problem that his baby won't sleep. If my DD had woken him up, ok I would have apologised but she didn't. She is allowed to make a normal amount of noise in her own home at 5.30pm.

I also added that as we live in terraced houses, it is expected that you will hear a certain amount of noise from your neighbours and you must be mad to think you will be able to live with complete silence all round.

I told him that I would be willing to forgive his rudeness on this occasion as if their baby won't sleep, they are obviously stressed and were lashing out. If he came round again complaining, I told him I will be asking him to keep his own child quiet in the mornings as he wakes us up at an unreasonable hour and to stop him crying from 7pm onwards too, as thats when my DD sleeps. He has not spoken to me since.

In your situation, I would contact the local community police and explain. I have many neighbours who have been in the same situation as you and the community police quickly sorted it out. You are allowed to make normal noise in your own home and should not be subjected to this abuse.

I would tear up their solicitors letters and put it back through their door. I'm not sure they are even genuine as it takes an environmental health officer to collect evidence of excessive noise and issue an abatement order. I have had my neighbours in the downstairs flat harass me about everyday noise. The environmental health officer told me that unless I was doing anything unreasonable don't worry. They didn't get anywhere with their complaint. Child noise and household noises will not be enough to get you into trouble.

good idea lorney, call 101 too op and get some advice from them aslo

"I would tear up their solicitors letters ....I'm not sure they are even genuine "
I'm not sure that's a good idea Elfhame. Environmental health officers are not the only people capable of collecting evidence. I would advise OP at least to keep the letters, regardless of what reply (if any) she chooses to make.

It maybe a friend who's a lawyer who sent it for them as a favour.

Keep everything for evidence. You've had some great advice on here, especially those who've been through it themselves.

Is the neighbour suffering with pnd and excessive anxiety maybe? It seems so OTT about noise. It's bizarre.

This sort of thing is SO annoying. I think some people must feel the world revolves around them!

Being a human being involves OTHER human beings and unless you live on a bloody island, alone, you're always going to see and hear evidence of other people living their lives!

I have a neighbour the same...he freaks out if we talk after 7 in the garden. I told him I'd complain about HIM if he didn't stop fussing about nothing. We're not loud...some folk are very strange.

I live in a semi and can hear my neighbours walking up the stairs, closing doors, even their baby crying. But if I can hear that, then they can hear me too, what would be the point of complaining, thats what happens living in a semi.

Ignore it, If they only started complaining since they're DD had been born, they'll get over it.

Do they think they're the first people in the world to have a baby

Don't bust a gut to reply to solicitor's letters. - Hopefully CAB can advise on that (good move to see them).

I'd ring Environmental Health for advice as well. If they have a solicitor's letter mentioning a baby playing with a bouncy ball and talking in the back garden as excessive noise they are going to look bonkers.

I found my 3 slept much better when there was noise around them (shopping malls particularly good). I used to hoover when they were asleep to get them used to it. They still sleep through pretty much anything (screaming right outside their open room accompanying cats bringing in live rats at 3am etc etc)

You are being neither inappropriate nor inconsiderate by making reasonable noise at reasonable times in your own home! They seriously just have to live with it, or move to a detached house in the middle of a field and send solicitors' letters to the birds for tweeting too early.

Loud telly every day after 11pm? Hammering on the wall / using power tools after 8pm? Party in the garden complete with stereo every weekend till midnight? these would be inconsiderate levels of noise. Your neighbours are barking (and/or have lost the plot from new baby sleep deprivation and hormones).

lorney i like your style and I wish I were a bit more assertive.
Not that I have problem neighbours. Mine are lovely. We live in a midterrace. not sure they feel the same about me

i live mid terrace too im always apologising to my neighbours luckily she has had kids of her own and understands you cant keep quiet all the time if either of us gets out of hand (such as my middle child grabbing the hammer and hammering the hell out of the door) we are able to knock and ask for it to be kept down we have each knocked once in 3 years (once when he got the hammer and once when they decorated late into the night and our baby was ill and tired)

they are being unreasonable call the environmental health and call the police on them

I've complained to my neighbours about slamming doors... When they've done it at 2,3,4am, repeatedly as guests come and go, and night after night ... Also asked the LL to pad the doors and they said padding didn't work.

Wish you lived next door to me!!!

But what did the solicitors letter actually say.....