To be counting down the days until ds (5) goes back up school?

[Sleepswithbutterflies]

I've so looked forward to him being at home but he's bored. He is an only one and stuck with me for company. Last week we were on holiday so that was ok.
We have quite a few play dates arranged - have had one today - but they only last a few hours and ds basically needs do be doing something at all times.
Today we went swimming this morning, then to the library and then met up with a friend at soft play this afternoon. We got back about 4.30 and now the tv is on and he's complaining he's bored.

He's gets up about 5.30am and goes to bed about 8, that's a lonnnngg time to fill. I feel so sorry for him stuck at home with just me. When it rains it's especially difficult but even when dry thinking up activities that last about ten hour but don't cost too much is hard.
We have two big days out planned next week and another two play dates so that should only leave one day free.

Four weeks left and I miss him so much when he's at school but when he's at home I just feel guilty that he's bored and lonely. He has never been good at entertaining himself, the most he will do is 10 minutes absolute tops.

Back up school? Back to school!!

Now stop it. You are not his one woman entertainment system. You are trying your best, and if your DS is bored then so be it, it won't kill him. Get him some colouring books and jigsaws and set him a challenge. Oh and every time he says "I'm bored," say "Oh that's great you can help me wash dishes/sweep up/tidy then." You may be surprised at how fast he finds something better to do!

He won't colour, draw or do Lego or jigsaws.
Gah.

Sounds like you're doing a good job of entertaining him tbh. I feel a bit like that with my elder child. My youngest has ASD and I booked him on a playscheme on alternate days, which has been fab for him. My elder one is off to a holiday club next week but tbh I think I should have booked them some days out at the same time. He is a bit bored with me I think and tbh I wouldn't mind a break from him, in the nicest possible way! Why not look ahead to next year and see if he can go to a few holiday clubs/activities for the some of the time to take the pressure off. Sometimes you just have to leave them to it. I've pretty much ignored both of mine today and got on with the housework and they are as calm as you like.

Hmm, I'd start to implement some independent play (whether he likes it or not!) as you can't possibly be expected to entertain him all those hours. I created such a rod for my own back with my first, as I played with her and entertained her so much. It resulted in a child who couldn't amuse herself at all. She needed either adult or child interaction all the time. No way did I fall into that trap with the younger two, and they think it the biggest treat if I play with them blush. Otherwise are there no holiday activity clubs you could look at? Then he could have his fill of playing with other kids. Good luck!

^^that!

He will if you stop entertaining him. Ask Cailindana said give him chores, and tell him to stop complaining.

I felt bad when my friend today (with two children) said they haven't had the tv on at all as they either play together (even though there's 5 years between them) or her son will happily amuse himself whilst her daughter (6 and the oldest) colours or makes looms bands or reads etc.

My tv is on a lot when we are in!

Learning to entertain himself is a skill, lots of siblings don't play brilliantly together so don't feel guilty about that.

You have to let him be bored , funnily enough usually after an hour or so of whining they will miraculously find something to do .It will be hard but it is not your role as a parent to entertain him ( at least not all the time) your role is to bring him up , that means teaching him the skill of entertaining himself .

Get him a few massive cardboard boxes - boys love those - then leave him to it (maybe scatter a few pens, scissors around).

Turn the TV off and leave it off. He might start to colour, play with Lego etc if the allure of the box isn't there. Its good for children to be bored sometimes, they need to be so they can learn to entertain themselves. Do you have a garden/yard? If so, there's loads to do out there, even in a tiny concrete yard. Building bug hotels, get a big flower pot, plant some herbs and make a mini garden, you can go to the garden centre and he can choose the plants, then you can let him plant them himself. You can make a water or messy play area, or sand.

I'd say one structured activity a day e.g. playground, and the rest let him sort himself out. You might find if he suggests it himself rather than being chivvied into it then he'll spend a much longer time on it.

There's so much to do in a day! Presumably you cook at least once a day? Maybe bake now and then? Sort washing, meal plan, go shopping? He can be involved in all that with the option to nip off and play by himself if he gets sick of that. But I would say TV only when strictly necessary otherwise he will always be "bored"

Look ignore your friend she is not you and your ds, good for her that she hasent had the TV in, it might be later on in the holidays . You are big his entertainment system, plan some activities, but he has to learn to self entertain. My dd7 who has ASD has got to that stage and it's wonderful, ds 2.5 years no, needs entertaining every second. Wish he would go to pre school.

Agree with outto, you have to let them get bored from time to time. I had boys too so yes to cardboard boxes.
What about some cheap paper, stickers, paints, playdough (I used to make my own) - the stuff the pound shops seem to sell these days?
Activities at local library? Bake some buns?
Visit local museums - they sometimes have holiday activities.
Get a sponge and bucket and clean the car?
I do appreciate it's not so easy when you've one child and they say "plaaaay with meeeee, mummy......"
Have to say I usually found it easier to invite playmates over.

The wonderful thing about being an only child is that you learn to entertain yourself. It really won't harm him to learn this at his age. When I was bored as a kid, my mum would suggest helping with the housework - strangely enough, I always managed to find something to do!

OP Is your friend the next door neighbour from Outnumbered?

Agree, you need to let him get bored.

I have two boys, and although they do play together, they also spend time alone. My youngest (7 years) spent the entire afternoon playing with lego, yesterday, whilst the eldest wandered around saying he was bored.

I just leave various activities around. Ds1 ended up teaching himself the guitar for an hour.

And, yes, of he's bored, get him to sort socks or tidy his room!

The longest he goes without saying "mum, mum, mum" is five minutes. I feel bad because I will miss him so much when he goes back but I don't get a minute to myself. He is in the bath at the moment - that is really the only time he will play on his own.

However if I put water outside for him to play in it doesn't seem to work the same and he still wants me to play with him. I'm an only one but I was always happy playing alone. Ds won't, I don't know if that's my fault or personality.
Tomorrow we are swimming again in the morning and then I need to go to the pet shop so ds can come too and Thursday we will be out all day. It just seems any longer than half an hour in the house and we struggle. It is my fault I know, I feel guilty that he's on his own.

Quiet time after lunch with no telly? He might be overtired with so much going on, seriously. I'm bored, doesn't necessarily mean he is bored, just not quite comfortable, children aren't always so good at articulating their emotions.

The other things is just find another child who can spend the entire day at your house, whether it is slobbing in front of tv, eating cheese on toast, playing a bit of nothing much in parallel. You may find another mother who would eat your hand off to be offered a day like that, and still have your son back for a few hours in return another day.

Dd is one of those children who is incapable of amusing herself, but give her her best friend to hang around with, they will spend all day just doing nothing in particular, arranging pebbles, hanging bits of elastic down the bannisters, tidying drawers etc.

Don't feel guilty for not having other siblings, mine fight!

My friend said "we're having far too much fun to put the tv on."

I start DS (4) off with an activity then leave him too it. I refuse to spend all day entertaining him. We do plenty of fun things so if he gets 'bored' then tough. I will make suggestions but not sit and play all day every day

When we have someone to play after about an hour ds starts to ask when they're going home as he's had enough. This is because he doesn't like sharing me. Doesn't mind sharing his toys, doesn't like me paying attention to the other child. We're working on tact! I find it better if we go out somewhere with another child. He will play quite happily then. He's also pretty good at making friends if we do go out on our own.

No advice but just wanted to say, I know exactly how you feel! I have an only one and also feel that guilt.