to think that all the fat bashing threads should have their own topic so that i can hide them?

[gymboywalton]

how many hand wringing threads do we need?

how did we get so fat? oh i can't believe how many fat people there are! fat people should pay more tax and it goes on and on and on and on......

it's dull ffs!!! find something else to be shocked by!

I'm fucking outraged at what they did to you Fideline! Numpties.

Makes no sense to me Mintyy

I think it's hugely complex and I am sadly aware that many people have a very difficult and sometimes dangerous relationship with food.

BUT.

I have noticed, since I moved to the UK, that many people of my acquaintance seem intent on not taking responsibility for their overeating.

One mother I know used to announce 'I'm STARVING' after drop off or before pick up. I know she eats three meals a day. But she would also have baguettes with mayo or cheese or cakes or scones, and always said she was hungry or 'needed' a treat/pick up/the sugar etc.

Yes, she was overweight. Yes, she used to complain bitterly at the unfairness of others' apparent fast metabolism, and became incredibly aggressive when someone said 'this is what I eat every day, what about you?' After one too many skinny lucky bitch cracks.

As a nation, there seems a growing belief that we deserve calorific treats every single day/to manage a bad time/cope with PMS etc.

I think there needs to be a lot more personal accountability.

I genuinely do not know any very overweight people who are happy about it. And I do know several.

Monte

That is interesting but it is another attempt to steer the discussion back round to obesity.

I thought the thread was about fat bashing? (Although I might be mistaken, yet again)

Fideline I saw (and liked) the thread you started in Site Stuff on this topic and wanted to post on it, but didn't get around to it. Sorry.

There is a lot of disordered eating out there and I think many of the undereating threads will be triggering and harmful for a lot of people.

As will the threads describing overweight people with gleeful nastiness.

I don't find it all that interesting tbh Monty.

Yes, we are fat because 1. we have been told to diet for years and dieting makes you fat, 2. there are too many snacks and junk food around, everywhere, available 24 hours, 3. portions in restaurants have got bigger, 4. we are much much lazier than even 20 years ago, 5. we are more depressed and a lot of people comfort eat when depressed, and yada yada.

But we do this and so what is the point of rehashing it again and again and again? I should think your example of ONE is an exception to the rule rather than the norm (in terms of seemingly being unaware of what is making her fat, I mean). And anyway, you have no idea whether she is aware or not - everything she says about her appetite could be true.

But we do know this

Why do people care about others business so much? As I said- live and let live! I can't stand nosey people/judgemental people/bullies- hell, i'll stick at my weight if it means i'm a decent person!

Fideline I saw (and liked) the thread you started in Site Stuff on this topic and wanted to post on it, but didn't get around to it.

The one a couple of weeks ago? It didn't go well. But thanks.

Neither did my parody protest thread in AIBU an hour ago. I despair really.

The fat haters are so loud.

Maybe us fatties need to start moaning about the smokers/stressheads/people who do sport which can cause injury and what a DRAIN they are on our resources. I am fat and I have had other people torment me all my life over it. their insults haven't made me thin, just have a low self-esteem.

I understand where you are coming from bauhausfan- but that would make you as bad as them. Rise above it and realise you are the better person. Bullying is bullying, shaming is shaming- regardless of the lifestyle choice.

Yeah but bauhausfan, that would just make you as judgy as the fatbashers. I hate all this judginess. And the supermarket shopping judging threads make me

Oops, crossposted with mulberry. I'm slow at this!

I just can't wrap my head around what makes anyone else care about a stranger's body shape. It is so weird it is unnerving to me.

I mean, it is a weirder thing to care about than smoking or stressy people, because it is doesn't impinge (second hand smoke, careless driving) on anyone else.

If only the fat bashers realised that whatever horrible things they think or say about the fat person they have seen at the beach/pool/shop is nowhere near as horrible as what the fat person thinks about themselves.

I would love to go swimming but at the moment I am too self conscious - not helped by threads on fat people.

I know I am overweight. I don't eat because I am greedy. I eat for other reasons that I am in the process of addressing. I am probably more overweight than I would have been if I hadn't dieted for years trying every diet going - messing up my metabolism in the process.

"If only the fat bashers realised that whatever horrible things they think or say about the fat person they have seen at the beach/pool/shop is nowhere near as horrible as what the fat person thinks about themselves."

So, so true. I am working hard at the moment, with a cognitive behavioural therapist, trying to learn to like myself - and she had to point out to me how harshly I talk about myself and how horrible my opinions of myself are.

I see a thread on obesity, and it makes me wish I was dead - as if I don't deserve even the smallest corner of this world. It makes me start thinking of, and hating myself for, all my bad food decisions. I wish people could see what is in my head, and feel my emotions - not for long - it is horrible being me - but just for a moment, so they could see I am a person, not just a lump-of-lard failure who is eating herself to death.

I thought the thread was about fat bashing? (Although I might be mistaken, yet again)

No I have probably got the wrong end of the stick, so apologies.

Mintyy I beg to differ.

Where I live, when the DC were small, there were regular meet ups at which women would eat cake, scones and buns. And they would spend a lot of time, with no apparent irony, moaning about losing weight.

I do believe we have lost sight of the appropriate amount to eat.

I know people who weigh food, peer disbelieving it at the titchy bowl of cereal, bung in another three times the recommended serving and say 'I simply cannot lose weight.'

I also believe that there are many people for whom it is a debilitating struggle full of self-loathing and a constant hateful dialogue.

I have worked with people who have EDs.

Please remember that not everyone thinks like that, people whose opinions are worth caring about won't judge you like that. I know it's easier said not to care what people think.

Oh god, not the cereal thing again.

Yanbu

SDTG - Please don't think that Their opinions are not worth your sorrow.

I also think we need to be posting this image on such threads.

I also think we need to be posting this image on such threads.

Yes!

I didn't reply on the other thread, because I would've got banned. However, what I wanted to say was "I may be fat, but you're a twat and I can go on a diet!"

Maybe it would be more diplomatic to just say MYOFB.

I agree sonajay, and I'm glad you're making a recovery and coming back to health.

Fwiw my taxes are my business, and if they're being spent on helping people with sugar addiction and obesity then your fat body is my business whoever you are.

Your body is not just your own concern if you aren't able to look after and have limited mobility, disease and dis-ability to work because you have sickened it from overeating. It belongs to a NHS budget, and the care it can afford.

I would prefer my taxes going towards cancer diagnostic and early treatment times, reducing waiting lists and helping those unfortunate enough to fall sick, not those who have got so fat from greed that they need two nurses to heave them up and wipe their massive arses, and all the costs associated with that level of care, both in personnel and equipment.

And in case you think I'm just being fat-ist, I wouldn't be happy to fund liver transplant operations to alcoholics, when there are other people on the list who would look after an new liver, and feel blessed by the chance of a new life, or even to smokers who would light up and inhale smoke into their new lungs.

No use in denying it, and calling everyone who speaks the truth a meanie, and suggesting they can F the F off. Doesn't change the facts.

We are heading towards a global healthcare crisis, and there will be less and less money to treat anyone, and all because of people who won't take responsibility for themselves and do something about their excess weight.